Soft Skills as a Female Autistic

Depends. If you want a life where you are just left alone by sociaty that gets easyer. A lot of other social things get a lot harder. That my impresion based on talking to a very small number of trans men.

Life gets a lot easier if you start presenting as male.

yeah ukrain is a real anomaly. It's one of those rare rare cases where neither side gains air superiority so the man on the ground has been more of a key player. Also russian tanks were old and out of date technically making them much better targets for personal anti tank weapons. The men on the ground are only doing so well because they're carrying very high tech kit that can punch holes in tanks and shoot down planes. No one is charging at the enamy bayonets fixed or marching miles a day to take ground. You don't have to be strong or fit to shoot a shoulder mounted rocket, just have a good eye, steady aim and a lot of nerv. In fact half the time they seem to be flying drones with bombs into each other. In the 21st century war truly is a video game. That said heavy weponry is very much key to the ukrainan advance such as it is. One of the reasons they are still mostly fighting defencivly is they don't have those new f16s america promissed yet. And lets not forget that the sea war is becoming quite decisive where ukrain is kicking russias ass.

Peter said:

Machines win wars not throwing masses of men against the enemy.

If only someone would tell the Ukrainians that, instead of telling them "just one more push"...

I'm surprised by the level of sexism in this forum

I'm not. It's everywhere and just as likely to be here - though it still sucks.

I've always understood 'I know I'm going to get myself in some trouble here' as code for 'I'm going to say something controversial which is likely to ruffle a few feathers but I'm so convinced of my being right that I don't care if it's wrong or hurtful and I'm definitely not going to soften it with 'perhaps, some or maybe. Being right and telling people that is more important than spotting subtlety or grey areas'. But your (Peter's) explanation is more succinct, I agree indeed

I Sperg said:

Do you honestly see what women have now as "Winning"?

To actually ask that question you are either astonishingly ignorant of the history of the women's movement, their suffering and the battles won or astonishingly, wishfully patriarchal.

Do you honestly see what women have now as "losing"? 

Do you honestly see what women have now as "Winning"?

My boss announced that she was pregnant the other day and I couldn't bring myself to pronounce the word "congratulations".

I once heard a woman describe the point at which you transition into middle age as the moment when your friend says 'I'm pregnant' and you no longer know whether to say 'are you alright' or 'congratulations.'

Can we just accept that, 'I know I'm going to get myself in some trouble here,' is just code for 'I know that people will disagree with me but they are still wrong.'

Actually when you say soft skills I tend to think of soft 'sciences.' You know like sociology and political science. Basically 'sciences' that don't involve maths and or lab work. I assumed that's where the soft in soft skills came from.

Edit ---

So I did some digging. Apparently "The term "soft skills" was created by the U.S. Army in the late 1960s. It refers to any skill that does not employ the use of machinery." (wiki) and later came to apply predominantly to social skills "A definition based on review literature explains soft skills as an umbrella term for skills under three key functional elements: people skills, social skills, and personal career attributes."

So nothing to do with gender.

No you didn't. That's my point.

I was just thinking about my mum putting big hairy spiders in envelopes and posting them under the bathroom door when my dad was shaving. She was laughing so much at my dads scream...so much for men spider wrangling and soft  women !

I explained why I felt I needed to. What's your point?

I Sperg said:

I know I'm going to get myself in some trouble here,

But you carried on anyway

Sexism goes both ways. As men have a lot of expectations on them too. I am sure some of the men would love to go out and arrange the cakes or whatever. 

As a woman myself , I actually like doing these kinda things. When it happened in old workplaces, we girls (and sometimes a guy or two) would go out and get the cakes etc and have a chat, and sometimes a wee sneaky coffee total skiving. It was a great way to get to know each other too. 

But yes I think that it needs to be mixed up a bit, so that it is more equal, so you are correct. 

some people like to do that sort of thing, some don't and that is what should be respected here. 

yes and why are 'soft skills' given the name 'soft' anyway? It used to be assumed 'females more likely to display them' in sexist eons gone by but nowadays in the business world it just means 'less direct'. I understand what Peter is saying though as I am also a civil servant and his explanation is exactly what this term means in the civil service and in many other corporate environments I've worked in. Even those environments have now moved on and colleagues now talk about 'communication skills'.  Who in your workplace is expecting you to do this stuff and saying it needs 'soft skills'? Seems bizarre and outdated to me.

This Person (Ottilie) said:

In the workplace it's expected that the female/female identifying colleagues will take care of the soft skill aspects of being in a team

What does this mean? I don't understand it. Do you mean that it is mainly women/female identifying people who usually arrange the colleague celebration life events? If ;you do, then that is not anything to do with 'soft skills' or 'being in a team'. It might just be that some people, who make an effort to understand their colleagues and life experiences are better able to cater for them. It doesn't mean they are expected to do them because of their sex.

This is the chance for the 1970s men reborn to join in again and espouse arguments that were made by men and won by women decades ago.

I consider what you describe as 'soft skills' as nothing more or less than outright sexism. Either everyone should take their turn or nothing should be done.