Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello All,
Not sure if this is a familiar situation or not?
My 7 year old son has suffered from bullying at school the worst of which was dealt with but he has suffered verbal bullying and things like boys shaking their wet hands at his trousers after washing them and laughing, sort of low level less obvious bullying if you like. The other day he came home and said that while queuing outside the classroom an older boy who has picked on my son before, had pulled his ears and stamped on his foot and he had pushed this boy away from another younger boy when he'd turned on him. However the Head teacher said she spoke to the 3 boys involved including my son, and all had a different story. So she viewed the CCTV and it showed our son pushing the other younger boy because he had threatened to pull our sons ears, while the older boy was bouncing around and trod on his foot. Our son is extremely honest and very rule abiding, but as with our older son who is also AS, it takes a lot of careful questioning to get to the actual facts. Unfortunately what has added to his anxiety is his class teacher telling him off for lying and that she is disappointed in him. He now thinks it's better not to tell teachers anything 'incase he's lying'. I guess my question is, how do I make sure he can say something if he is being bullied but cope with being able to sort out the sequence of events and get his story straight before saying anything? I feel like just telling him to keep his head down and don't say anything as I feel like the teachers don't understand that he struggles to communicate his concerns.
I hope this makes sense as its kind of hard to explain.
Thank you.
Abbi
Hello, I’m sorry to hear about your son’s problems. The following article has some interesting observations to make. The idea of a chart or colour code with which your son can indicate the seriousness of the bullying, sounds a good idea to me.
https://the-art-of-autism.com/how-to-keep-the-bullies-at-bay-for-those-on-the-autism-spectrum/
Dear All,
Thank you so much for all your kind words and wisdom. It's nice to have the reassurance that this is an issue worth discussing further with the class teacher and Head.
Abbi x
Sorry to hear of this. It is so hard. Teaching is a demanding job but I will make one point. When my son was diagnosed with autism I was refered to an autism workshop where I sat and listened but was already very familiar and aware of what was being said to me. I'd already lived with this for 10 years why are you telling me? I thought why don't these people go into schools and educate teachers. Would be a much better use of their time. Xx