Published on 12, July, 2020
My son is 8 years old and has suspected Asperger syndrome...we’re waiting for an official ASD diagnosis. Meanwhile, he’s been struggling with a sudden and unexplained rejection from his best friend at school. My son is very sensitive and struggles socially, so he has found this rejection very hard to deal with and is very confused by it. The reason for this rejection is unknown and, tbh, unimportant at this point, as kids will be kids and these things happen all the time in school, but what I’m really worried about is how this is affecting my son. I’ve noticed him displaying symptoms of depression at just 8 years old and I can see that the situation is really playing on his mind. I want desperately to help him, but, not having had a diagnosis yet and therefore any therapy or even advice, I’m not sure what to do. I have been thinking about talking to my son’s teacher to make them aware of the situation, but not sure how that would help or if they can even do anything about it. Has anyone been in a similar situation? Please help! Thank you.
I can't give you advice from a parental point of view as I do not have children. But I can relate to your son so much. This happened to me a lot as a child. Actually it still happens as an adult. I think looking back it perhaps wasn't as sudden as I thought. Because it happened numerous times I think there probably were signs but with my autism, I didn't pick up on them. My social skills weren't good and I think I had a tendency to "cling" to the friends I did make and after a while, they would get fed up and not want to be my friend anymore. It was and is really hard and I can really sympathise with your son about it. I think it probably is worth speaking to your son's teacher. They can't wave a magic wand to make it better for your son but it would allow them to keep an eye on him and perhaps try and help him socially. They may even be able to speak to the other child to see what the problem was. A lot of school is social and as much as the teaching is their main concern, schools are usually good at trying to deal with social problems. If he is showing signs of depression, it may be worth a chat with the gp? Things at that age usually get referred to CAMHS but the waiting list is always really long so it may be worth getting on it incase the signs get worse. I wish I could give you more advice. Rejection is such a hard thing to deal with. I hope the situation improves for you and your son.