This sums up my kind of love Former Member
My love is not kind and gentle like your love. It’s not fair and gives nothing, other than itself. It fierce and unrelenting and it leads me, I don’t lead it.
I don’t know about transcendent love, other than what I learned from you today, but this sums up my love.
Out of curiosity ~ I’ll put it on here because the other thread is pretty long ~ but do people of the conditional love variety, ever wonder about my love. For example, do you see it as something worse, or better (your terms) or is it just a different kind of love to yours, no better, no worse, just different. I suppose I’m asking, do you deny the existence of my world like I do poverty etc? I haven’t got any qualms with your love, now that I understand it, as much as I ever will, I just wonder what you think of my love?
I don't think there's anything 'wrong' with it (your idea of love), I don't think that's for me (or anyone) to judge. It's just different from mine. I don't deny the existence of anything for other people, whatever a person believes is 'real' and exists for them. It just doesn't necessarily exist for me.
Some people believe in ghosts, some believe in god(s), some believe in evil, some believe in all sorts of things that i can't even begin to comprehend and for those people these things are 'real' and exist. For me they just don't exist. I don't spend much time thinking about things that don't exist. Obviously I CAN, if I want to, in a hypothetical way, I just don't choose to very often.
Well I saw a ghost once, having never believed in them, and that was pretty cool! Lol! I don’t believe in evil or different gods but I do understand that people have gods such as money, which I think of as a false god but I understand that’s my perception and it’s very real and far from false to them, and I’m quite sure many people wouldn’t be doing the jobs they were doing etc if money wasn’t their god, so yeah, I can see it’s very real to a lot of people. Just one question, the people who practice conditional love, how the hell do you all figure out who to love and who not to love because you all seem to know the rules? And when did you/do you actually get taught the rules? How could I have missed them?
I agree with this. As I've said on the other thread, I respect anyone's wishes to believe whatever they want to believe - as long as it isn't something that is designed to harm others, or be exclusionist or negatively-judgmental of non-followers. There are too many such people in the world, and they do enormous amounts of harm. Not just to others, but to themselves.
I don't believe in gods, or abstract concepts like 'good' and 'evil'. I reserve judgment, though, on some other spiritual matters. I'm not sure I believe in life after death or reincarnation, either. But some very strange things have happened to me in my life, and they defy any rational explanation that I can attempt. Much of it centres around my mother, and the immediate aftermath of her passing away. I accept that, with the mental state I was then in, I could have been susceptible... or, perhaps, more 'sensitive' than normal. I kept finding coins with significant years of minting on them - significant for both mum and myself. Foreign coins, even. And I found them at particular times - such as when I'd been diverted from an intended course by some obstruction when out walking, or when I'd felt myself oddly 'drawn' to a particular place. I also found a book where it wouldn't normally be - in the waiting room of the registrar when I went to register her death. Not an ordinary book, mind. A favourite book of mine. Not one you're likely to find in charity shops or libraries, either. An obscure one. I found feathers after I'd been told I would find them. All could be simple coincidence, of course. But these things were hugely reassuring. I saw a medium who knew nothing about me whatsoever... yet she described my past and present life in great detail, and gave me specific names of people. Not random ones, such as you sometimes find with mediums. Very specific, with qualities of those people attached to them.
And I also saw my mother's ghost - the day after her funeral. It was very strange. I was with a neighbour of hers in an adjacent flat, telling her how it had all gone. I was alone at the bungalow, continuing with the clearance. I was just leaving this neighbour when I spotted someone - from the corner of my eye - going towards mum's bungalow. It was the figure of a woman in a white dress and white sandals, and for some odd reason I thought it was a nurse. I took my leave and dashed out. The interval was no more than 5 seconds. But there was no one there... and positively nowhere they could have gone in the time. I was stumped. Then it struck me. Mum had a white dress and a pair of white sandals. That's all I'd really seen, because the upper body was obscured by the door frame. I turned around, and the neighbour I'd been talking to was standing there. She asked who it was. I said there was no one, and I couldn't understand it. But she must have understood something, because she said 'That's how they appear to us, you know. Out of the corner of the eye.'
I'm essentially a rationalist person. But...well... I know what I saw. Or what my mind tricked me into seeing. I know which explanation I prefer...
I never really think about life after death and that kind of stuff either, I just figure that if there is life after death then I’ll certainly find out about it after I die so I’m ok to wait until then to find out, if there’s anything to find out. But when I was living in the Isle of Man, there was what I thought could be a short cut to work but I was never early enough setting off to work to try it out. However, one morning when I was setting off to walk to work, I saw a lady walking the short cut way, so I thought great, I’ll follow her. She wasn’t too far ahead of me but further than my reach and I didn’t just want to shout, oi lady, or whatever so I quickened my pace to catch up to her, because I wanted to chat to her as we were walking. But after a while, she disappeared, I thought she must have gone through an enclosed door or something but there was nothing but a brick wall, a dead end and on the right hand side was a massive hedge leading to the bowling club that nobody could have disappeared through. When I got to work, my colleague asked, what was she wearing, and I said thinking about it, she had an old fashioned nurses outfit on and my friend said she asked because the lady took me to what was the entrance to the old maternity hospital, so I guess I saw a ghost then. I also had very clear communication with a dead person once, my friend, which was really weird. I frequently, probably at least once a week, say good morning or whatever to all the people in my life who have died, such as grandparents, family, and friends, I talk to them pretty regularly and often ask for the advice etc as well. I have no idea if they hear me or not, if doesn’t really matter, because they’re in my heart and I just like to talk to them and stuff and keep them in my life.
BlueRay said:I frequently, probably at least once a week, say good morning or whatever to all the people in my life who have died, such as grandparents, family, and friends, I talk to them pretty regularly and often ask for the advice etc as well. I have no idea if they hear me or not, if doesn’t really matter, because they’re in my heart and I just like to talk to them and stuff and keep them in my life.
I do this all the time - particularly with mum. I keep a ritual every Wednesday evening, between 7 pm and 7.22 pm - the last 22 minutes I spent alone with her before she passed. I light candles... and I sit and think about her, and talk to her. It's very comforting. I can't think I'll ever not do it.
Yeah, I find it very comforting as well and I think I’ll always talk to them, I think I always have so can’t imagine not doing it. I can’t look at the stars either without remembering them all, and there’s quite a list, so it’s good for helping me with memory skills as well. I have little jokes as well, such as I often wonder if my 3 best friend’s (all male) can see me now, so therefore when I’m naked etc, so there’s no place to hide in my life! Lol! I imagine they see everything so it’s like I’m sharing my life with them in a way I wouldn’t with a live person. I think I feel closer to them all now than when they were alive.
I don’t really know about love.
I am not certain that I understand what it really is. And I have some doubts as to whether it really exists.
I do think, however, that ‘loving unconditionally’ is a condition in its own right.
I do, therefore, ‘love’ an infinite regress..., if that helps?
I don’t think it’s possible to really know love, not in the usual sense of knowing. It’s more an experience and each person’s experience of it will of course be different. However, no matter how different the experience, there is no doubt about the experience of love. Those who have experienced it may struggle to describe it but they all know what it means, even if explanations differ.
I’m not sure how loving unconditionally is a condition but it’s sounds interesting. Please explain that to me as I can’t undetstand it and I have no idea at all what that means ~ to love an infinite regress! Lol!
Thank you for you answer, yes, it helps, I look talking about this stuff. Thank you.
I guess I am thinking that, if you love people unconditionally, (which I understand to mean loving them without any conditions placed upon them that they must fulfill in order to receive your love ...) then that in itself is a condition on you, i.e you must love people unconditionally (i.e no matter what...) That is a condition (placed on you) in itself isn't it? Or have I got the total wrong end of the stick here?
An infinite regress is broadly speaking (in my understanding,) when someone is asked to justify their answer and then they find that their answer/justification actually only creates another further question, and this process goes on to infinity (and beyond.)
When we start hitting the infinite regresses and the paradoxes, these are my most favourite things .