A few years ago, I said to my mentor, that I loved doing whatever I was doing. He said, that’s interesting, I only do what I love.
I had no idea what he was talking about at the time but I felt that he had said something profound, so I allowed this thought to sink in and once I realised what it meant, I also made the decision to do only what I love.
It was one of the best decisions I ever made because now, I do only what I love.
How many other people only do what they love and what is their reason for not doing what they love, if that’s the case.
It has created an interesting and exciting journey for me because prior to this, I didn’t really know what I loved doing, I’m still exploring that and it’s been fascinating to see how I’ve lived many years without a clue about what I loved doing. Now I love exploring and finding out what I love to do.
Parents always expecting me to fit in with them and relatives. Which involved going on holidays with constant bickering family, partying on traditional occasions, getting drunk, being bombarded with non-productive political rants, then waking up with bad hangovers the morning after. I shunned everything for solo motorcycling and cameras.
I hope one day to be in a position to do only what I love.
I only do what I love. But, I do have very simple tastes.
I love being with my family, so I spend all of my free time with them.
I work a minimum wage job that I really enjoy, because I have no interest in a high-flying career that takes up my time and mental energy. So I know that I'm not tied down by needing a certain salary if I ever stopped enjoying my job, and I have free time without worrying about any commitments.
What makes me happy is just living the easy life, to maximise time with my loved ones, so that's exactly what I do. And if there's ever anything I'm not happy with in my life, I just change it.
That's great Nada. Seeing horses gives me great joy. A house I lived in, in the Lake District, used to get horses going past, I used to delight in the sounds their hooves made and then seeing the fine beast would increase my joy even more.
My upbringing was similar to yours, my family all thought I was weird for not drinking alcohol and joining in with all their 'fun'. I also love cycling, although when in England it is pedal cycling that I do but I love it and yes, I meet with some rather interesting sights on occasion. When I'm in Bali or India I ride a motorcycle. I'm just starting to get a bit interested in the camera although I don't think it's going to be my thing. I always feel I'm missing out on something when I take a photo, as if the camera is depriving me of the moment but I have found a little fondness for looking back over photos, occasionally, and I would like to use my own photos on my web site etc.
Keep up the good work and please share any interesting photos that you take while you're out and about.
You will never be in a position to do only what you love California, our society doesn’t work like that. From being baby’s we are groomed and taught to do what our parents want us to do and then our school system is set up for us to do what the teachers want us to do and then if you go into employment, we do what our employers want us to do and even outside of that, many people go along with the societal norm of how we spend our leisure time. But if you make the decision to do only what you love to do, before you know it, you will realise one day, hey, I’m doing what I love. The decision comes first and the rest flows naturally from that. Never hope, it is a disempowering position to put yourself in as you are effectively giving your power away. Take your power back and decide that from this day forward, you choose to do only what you love. You don’t even have to know what you love doing at this stage, you need only make the decision to do what you love and the rest, as they say, is history. I guarantee you that if you chose to make the decision to do only what you love to do, and you don’t go back on that decision, you will find yourself one day, doing only what you love. You don’t have to know ‘how’ to do it, only that you will and the intelligent life force within you will figure out the way, the most perfect way, in the way it does when it breathes your body and pumps the blood around your veins. You don’t know how to do that but it does and it will also bring your dreams into reality. If you decide to do only what you love, it will make it happen as surely as it breathes your body.
That is so heartwarming and inspiring Blade. I too have simple tastes. I love how you have set your work life up and how you have all bases covered. You’re a true joy and a gift to this world and you’re following in the foot steps of one of our great inventors, Steve Jobs. He used to look in the mirror every day and ask himself, if today was my last day on earth, would I be doing what I’m about to do today. And if he got a no, three times running, he simply changed what he was doing. Thank you for being you and for being a true blessing to this world. Your loving contribution touches not only your blessed family, but it reaches every corner of the universe, touching everyone in it with your calm and loving ways. None of us lives in isolation, we all touch each other, near and far. Radio waves can only travel in a straight line and from one specific point to another but the life force within us moves in every direction, reaching every point and I am truly grateful for the love and good feelings you send out to me and each and everyone of us. The world needs more Blades.
I'm happy for people who are fortunate to be able to do what they love. I really am. Good on them!
But I'm also extremely cautious - as this sort of (somewhat unintentionally naïve) thinking can sometimes be dangerous. It makes the rest of us feel bad too.
I am not in a position to do what I love at all. Indeed, every time I try to do so, I suffer a profound set-back, and I'm made more vulnerable- never mind feeling even more dejected. Instead, life forces me to continually play it's game on its terms; working hard at an unskilled and low paid job, with little hope of improvement or betterment, simply so I can pay rent, taxes and bills. I don't even do much in my spare time anymore as I just can't afford it, and I'm so stressed out by life that I just want to hide when not working.
I'm never going to succeed in life. I'll never have skills, a career, a mortgage, a meaningful romantic relationship, savings or kids etc. Autism has crippled me from a worthwhile existence. I have to struggle for very little reward, whereby it's just such hard and draining work all of the time, just to stay afloat in a meagre existence. Life presents no positive or alternative possibilities, and seeing a black, weighty future only makes my current efforts even harder to endure.
So, yes - it must be like a dream to do what you love. But you have to be careful saying it like a positive affirmation, on the lines of "if you just wish hard enough, you can do it too!" Reality for the rest of us is not so film-like. Rather, some of us are forced to play the game, knowing we will never win, yet also knowing we're not given the option to opt out either.
You already are succeeding. I couldn’t even manage a 7.5 hour job at a coffee shop for more than a few months and I was pushing it at that. You’re a huge success to get this far in life, being autistic in a world set up for nt’s. Don’t discredit how much energy and skill that takes. Actors, the film type ones, not us aspie type, although some actors are also aspie, get oscars and loads of money for doing what we do on a daily basis and not only do we not get an Oscar, but we barely get noticed.
Why would you want a mortgage? You do realise that by saying that, you are effectively asking for debt. And it sounds like you’ve already convinced yourself that you’ll never have a meaningful relationship, savings or kids, so that rules those things out of the equation.
You’re right, life certainly doesn’t present any positives or alternative possibilities, we have to create those ourselves, and it’s not as difficult as you might think.
Somebody doing what they love doesn’t make you feel bad. You feel bad because you feel bad. If you were feeling good, you would feel good to hear about others enjoying a happy life, it wouldn’t suddenly make you feel bad. And of course, anybody who sees a black, weighty future would find even the slightest of effort hard work. Because after all, what’s the point. You’ve already decided that you have only a black, weighty future, with no hope of a huge debt, a meaningful relationship, kids or savings.
Yes, you do have to be careful with saying positive affirmations. A person who already has a belief that their life is doomed would be wasting their time saying positive affirmations. It would be like trying to instal new software on a computer that’s already effected with a virus. You have to clean the bugs out first.
There is no point in playing a game if you already know that you won’t win. Unless of course you are simply playing it for fun, otherwise, what’s the point of even starting? Nobody gives anybody any options, we create our own.
I wonder how your life would change if you decided that although you have previously tried and failed to get what you want in life, you would be willing to look at where you went wrong and try again.
You are also giving yourself mixed messages to start with. That would lead anyone on a merry goose chase that has no ending. You say you are happy for others yet their happiness makes you feel bad. Which one is it?
I wonder how your life would change if you were willing to admit the truth. That you are already a great success. Anyone who ever learned to walk is a great success and how many attempts and failures did that take? You never gave up then, after no doubt several hundreds of attempts and failures. You didn’t decide that this is it, I can’t do it, life isn’t handing me any favours, I’m just going to give up and stay on my bum for the rest of my life. Maybe you were going around things the wrong way on your previous attempts of creating the life of your dreams?
For example, are you absolutely certain, 100%, what you would like to experience in life? If I said to you now, I’m going to increase your wages by four times. What would your life look like? If I said I was going to increase your wages so you are bringing home £10,000.00 a week and I’m going to reduce your working hours by half and your work load by more than that. What would you be doing today? If you can’t answer that immediately, with all it’s fine details, then you don’t know yet what it is you do want because I guarantee you that when you know what you want, you will get it. Just like when you learned to walk, despite the set backs. When you know what you want, such as, to walk, set backs become opportunities to start again with more awareness, they’re for growth because you have got your eye and attention on your goal and nothing is going to stop you. Life doesn’t hand out chances and opportunities, you have to create them and that is done beneath the surface, by the very same power that pumps blood around your veins and breathes air through your lungs. When you know what you want and you have a burning desire to achieve it, you will, because you don’t stop until you have it and every step on that journey is blissful joy, even when things don’t work out as planned. You keep your focus on what it is you do want, you go to any lengths to achieve it and you don’t give in ‘until’ you have achieved it.
I wrote a long response to this,but the site bombed and I lost it.
It was probably for the best, as it was exceptionally negative.
Damn, don’t you just hate it when that happens!
It doesn’t matter how negative it is, it’s better out than in and by exploring these things we often find hidden pockets of negativity within us. Once we see it, we can dispel it but while ever it’s hidden, it’s festering and giving us exactly what we don’t want.
Have a look at the decisions you’ve made so far. You have decided you will never get a mortgage, relationship or savings. How has that worked out? Have you got exactly what you decided you would get?
And in terms of learning to walk, despite all the set backs, did you achieve your aim once you decided you were going to walk?
We always get what we want in life, it’s just some people give up before they get there so instead they get what they don’t want. People who succeed, simply keep going until they get there, despite the difficulties and set backs, they just don’t give in. There’s no magic formula other than deciding what you want and deciding your going to have it and don’t be distracted along the way. You simply keep on going until you get there and once you’ve made the decision, you simply show up, do your best and allow life to take you on a magical journey.