Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi, everyone
Not sure how this all works yet as new to the site.
I have 4 Children all boys from 21 - 12, two of which are likely to be getting a diagnosis very soon for Aspergers. I have already been through the diagnosis process once for my now 19 year old, but they felt he was borderline so could not do a diagnosis, now however as he as got older, they have decided they want to re assess as they feel he is on the spectrum.
I also have a 14 year old, who is almost at the end of diagnosis. I have done alot of online research on Autismn and have also learned through my own experiences of coping with different situations, but i must say i am struggling slightly with my 14 year old who has selective mutism also and am wondering if anyone else has a child with selective mutism, that can share any pointers.
Thank you xx
Hi, so lovely to hear back from you,
Your son's problems sound very similar to my daughter's. The problems that she encounters because of her autism would be much easier remedied if she could communicate what the problem was, but as she can't ,it all builds into an anxiety meltdown.
It has often been the simplest thing, such as her pen has broken, but the whole lesson is lost to tears because she can't tell anyone. The school, and to be honest also me for a while, couldn't understand why she couldn't just write it down. I know now that once she is in that place , she simply can't think 'straight', so writing isn't an option. And if I, her mother , have taken so long to grasp that then her teachers aren't likely to understand.
Does your son have a designated TA or anything in school? I know this has helped my daughter immensely, though she is only there as and when she's needed (ie when she has a tearful breakdown), and is only there at the school's discretion. Though she has a diagnosis of ASD from the local health authority, she doesn't have a statement of special educational needs. My understanding is the school has to provide all available help anyway.
As for outside therapy, we have had involvement with various agencies and have meetings at the school fairly regularly. So far, an educational psychologist has been in and asssesd her and made reccomendations to the school. Speech and language are involved but little has been done yet, and we are waiting for an appointment with CAMHS.
For us, it's all about managing her anxiety and keeping her in school, we would love her to do well, but she has refused to sit exams in some subjects( all the humanities basically).
How do the school expect you to provide 'evidence' of anxiety, surely they can see if he's not coping. It is their responsibility to provide for him in school. Have you had involvement with CAMHS yet, or an educational psychologist? There will be a wait for an appointment though, if your LEA is anything like ours.
And yes, I'm hoping for the light at the end of the tunnel too. It's not all bad though;there's always minecraft. xx