Published on 12, July, 2020
hi everyone,
I am very concern the way i am being treated by my specialist as I felt they are forcing to adapt the normal enviroment and i am very traumatizing. I had been hurting myself alot these night with lots of bruises and cant sleep due to the depression.
my specialist had been forcing me to put down my special interest in disney characters, fairy tale and costumed characters and adapt the mainstream enviroment. they even force me to interact with someone I don't like (my peers). My peers loves things like sport and watching television whcih i don't like.
In my world, i like playing with the children and we play together around my area with toys and dolls. the reason i like interacting with the children because they share interest like me. but my specialist is forcing me not to hang out with them because of age difference eventhought no one mind about it. their parent don't bother about this and no one care about this. but they still force me not to hang out with someone who shares interest like me while interact with someone don't have interest like me. they are doing this to me because of my age and i feel like they are bullying me.
i am very traumatized but no adult are listening to me as they all are on my specialist side just because this lady is a therapist. if i talk to my parent about it, they will punnish me for not being greatful to my specialist. I have no one on my side. I need help.
I am being forced to adapting an enviroment that i don't like. I am very very traumatized.
Does anyone here is on myside and think it's okay of what i like to be doing as i need help.
reminder i am someone at my very late teen.
Hi Adrien. Sorry to hear about how your feeling right now. I would say as long as the parents of the younger children are fine with it then it's not anyone else's business. I do understand that these days people may worry for your safety (accusations) and others in regards to age differences. It would be awful for things to be perceived in a way that isnt correct. I dont have Autism my son does and hes 10. I can tell you he prefers the company of his 7 year old bro and his friends than that of kids his own age. His peers are bored of the things he's still very much interested in. It's so hard for you guys I really feel for you when making sense of this world. I cant make sense of this world and I dont have Autism. I recently recieved a post about blue buckets for halloween. It said I may look older but I have autism and still enjoy halloween basically. I'm thinking you enjoy things that other people perceive to be too young for you but like the blue bucket raises awareness for halloween it should raise awareness all year round??? People need to be more educated and accepting of Autism. Are your parents supportive. If so maybe talk to them about how you feel?
well about age difference concerned, lewishad, i mean if i have autism, that shouldnt be that concerned. my therapist could tell people i am autistic. like i even heard a severe autistic man who has a mind of a child and one day, he just said hello to the child and even hug him because the child is cute, the parent didnt even mind as they can see he is autistic and even smile and say that he is good with children. i mean having autism should be a freepass for interacting with children as long as both get on well okay which is also apply to other people of any age. and as what the therapist are concern, i mean eventhought a 16 years old interact with younger children, some people still get worried but i did that since as a 16 years old as well but no one mind. so that shouldnt be my therapist business and coming to destroy my world and ruin me.
and for accusation, i mean the gardai (mean police in ireland) are trained to deal with people with autism and i also have my autism id card. say if the accusation did happened, all my parent could say is that i'm autistic so the gardai will understand and nothing will happened.
Autistic Adrian said:so do you mean by i can interact with children but i still need to interact with people at my own age as well as children?
Well given that your psychological maturation is more like a child's, and your physiological age is more like an adult's, a measure of both interaction types would seem reasonable, so basically yes you still need to interact with children the same age as you mentally 'and' adults the same age as you physically.
Your mind is maturing at one rate in terms of being younger, and your body is maturing at another rate in terms of being older, so these younger and older rates of maturation or development need to be accounted for and worked with at different times ~ to allow for your psychological (personal) and sociological (social) development to happen for you in a healthy life affirming way, as in terms of being an autistic person.
Does that make sense?
so do you mean by i can interact with children but i still need to interact with people at my own age as well as children?
Autistic Adrian said:but why are you agree that my therapist to force me to interact with someone i dont like.
I am not agreeing with forcing you to interact with someone you do not like, whereas I have been explaining to you the nature of society in order that you consider a balanced approach to socialization, and how 'you' can choose to go about achieving it in terms of your developmental maturation ~ or more simply growing up mentally to balance more with your age physically.
This does not mean that I mean you have to give up your special interests and your interactions with those who share them.
Autistic Adrian said:i know that i do need to have some people at my age, but i do not agree that i need to stop interacting with children just because of my age as that's agist.
It is only you in this discussion that imagines you have to stop interacting with people that are younger than you.
Autistic Adrian said:Well i'm telling you, you dont want me to discriminate those who are not in my group but they dont discriminate against me for playing with children younger than me just because of my age either as i am autistic. i have evry right to be difference. that is just being difference , interacting with cchildren way younger than me.
All you need do is balance up your interactions as you have stated that you know you need to do in terms of interacting with people your own age.
deep thought, i want to know what do you think is mean that autistic people should be accepted? i know that i do need people who are similar age as me but that doesnt mean i need to stop playing with other children especially if they or their parent dont mind. i do not called this is acceptance if i was forced to adapt the social norm and the age appropriate concept. like what you said my therapist are trying so hard to stop me playing with other children just because of afraid of false accusation.
like false accusation could happened between anyone of any age. like even a middle age woman can frame me that i had touched her when i did not. so does that mean i need to avoid interacting with woman just because i'm a male. no. that just restraining you from interact with people i want to interact with and i do not restrain me like that. plenty of men interact with woman. so why children is the special case. that's just age segregation between adult and children. i do not called this as equality and democracy. children are also the same as woman.
well i am autistic, i do not follow the social norm or age appropriate to torture myself. no one will dare accuse me as i am autistic and disabled. and age difference friendship is just a difference which is normal for me and my nature. as long as i am not hurting anyone, then i should be free to be myself including interact with my little friends.
like i even heard once there was a girl age 25 who was severely autistic and one time, at the playground, she like running around with children and her mum dont mind and the children's parent dont mind as she is autistic. the mother even told other parent that "my daughter is autistic. she likes playing with children" and the parent saids " it's okay as long as she is fine with that". and her social worker even encourage her to interact with these children.
so why is that difference for me. well the society include the children should accpet autistic differences. as long as autistic people are not just hurting other for fun, then thats okay.
but why are you agree that my therapist to force me to interact with someone i dont like. JESUS CHRIST! i know that i do need to have some people at my age, but i do not agree that i need to stop interacting with children just because of my age as that's agist. Well i'm telling you, you dont want me to discriminate those who are not in my group but they dont discriminate against me for playing with children younger than me just because of my age either as i am autistic. i have evry right to be difference. that is just being difference , interacting with cchildren way younger than me.
Autistic Adrian said:and about the age difference friendship, are you saying i need to stop outplaying right away now because of my old age, this is pressing my red button?
No ~ I was stating nothing of the sort. You were imagining that I a said what you were pretending instead to be the case, even though I stated this:
Deepthought said:Of course not, but as long as your therapist is not discriminating against you as an autistic person who is psychologically maturing at a slower rate than is normally the case for non-autistic people, you are not entitled to discriminate against her on the basis that autism is free pass to do anything you want either. Remember that equality in your situation with your therapist and society in general ~ involves that you can interact with children in terms of a shared interest in Disney toys and games to reasonable extent, and that interacting with more responsible people of your own age is also involved to a reasonable extent ~ in order that you can in a balanced way participate and develop in society as the talented individual that you are, and can more as such be.
Of course not, but as long as your therapist is not discriminating against you as an autistic person who is psychologically maturing at a slower rate than is normally the case for non-autistic people, you are not entitled to discriminate against her on the basis that autism is free pass to do anything you want either.
Remember that equality in your situation with your therapist and society in general ~ involves that you can interact with children in terms of a shared interest in Disney toys and games to reasonable extent, and that interacting with more responsible people of your own age is also involved to a reasonable extent ~ in order that you can in a balanced way participate and develop in society as the talented individual that you are, and can more as such be.
A reasonable extent of interaction with children involves a reasonable extent of interaction with people about your own age and older also.
So being that you are not yet as psychologically mature as you are physiologically ~ you need in part to interact with people who are psychologically the same age developmentally as you are, so that you mature with them in the way that children do, and you need also in part to interact with people who are physiologically the same age or older developmentally than you ~ so that you mature with them in the way adults do.
The basic problem (it very much seems) is that you have been thinking as many autistic people do in terms of 'absolutes' ~ involving what is called autistic black and white thinking, where everything you want to do (white thinking) involves children and nothing you want to (black thinking) involves adults, and when you previously read me stating that you need a bit of both ~ you only imagined one type of interaction wholly, rather than both partly.
Is it possible then that your therapist actually requires you to interact a little more with people your own physical age, over time, and as such to interact a little less with children who are your own mental age?
Autistic Adrian said:i do not have to have another meltdown and i dont want a terrible future as this could lead me to a terrible life.
Well with a slow graduation from just interacting with children, you could also be interacting with adults who will sooner rather later have children themselves ~ or else risk the lonely life thing yourself more possibly?