Published on 12, July, 2020
I am over fifty, just wondering if it is worth pursuing a diagnosis or a waste of time. I have worked in Education for a long time and always suspected that I have traits.
Since childhood, I have always struggled with social situations, avoiding them whenever possible. Always used to be possessive about friends, couldn’t cope with friends from one part of my life meeting friends from another part.
Always been at peace only when alone. Hate changes of routine. Struggle with relationships, find loss of space very difficult. Had a few periods of depression, usually when in long term relationships, even if happy.
Have worked all my life, but found it exceptionaly exhausting, particularly when living with others. When I lived alone and came home from work to complete peace, I coped. Whenever I have lived with a long term partner ( hardlyy ever), I experience stress if don’t get some time alone at home. Recently, with age as well as this, I have had work difficulties and had to leave my long-term career for much less secure employment.
I get totally exhausted if anything changes e.g. if I cannot use my usual routes. Also, if things get moved in the home. On moving house, it has always taken me 4-5 years to settle in. I do have an amazing talent for remembering certain things...faces, car number plates, phone numbers. I can recognise people I haven’t seen since childhood. Also, have recognised strangers from a meal in a restaurant a long time afterwards etc...I can remember all the car number plates from my parents and my cars over the years for no,apparent reason.
I score 37 on an online AQ.
Hi. I have just been diagnosed at the age of 55yrs. As a woman I was ignored and misdiagnosed, mismedicated etc. I would say that a diagnosis may help you to understand whats actually going on with you BUT it will not make any difference to your life unless you are very, very lucky.
In my experience there is little/no actual support out there once you have a diagnosis and, certainly in my case, it has not helped me at all, if anything it has made me feel totally hopeless. There is a difference between suspecting that you have a syndrome and confirmation. My diagnosis has rammed home the fact that my whole life has been ruined by this condition and as there is no cure or even useful therapy etc there is little point in having a label as nothing is going to improve and at my age there is no chance of picking up the pieces and starting again.
Think carefully about what you want before you make your decision.
wildernessvoice said:
Which is a perfectly valid take on it. As I said, it's a double-edged sword, and for many the negative edge will be the sharper one.
Where I differ is that my diagnosis helped me to realise that there isn't, in fact, anything 'wrong' with me after all. I'm simply different. Yes, my life could have been easier. But when I look back on it all now, and when I look at general society as it is, I'm actually glad that I'm different in that way. For me, the difference between suspecting and confirming was mainly positive. When I was only suspecting, and even though I was in no doubt, I still had the worry that I would be told 'No... it's not that.' Confirming, on the other hand, was final validation. And that, for me, was priceless.
As for labeling... well, I had plenty of that prior to diagnosis: anti-social, shy, rude, fussy, stupid, naive, gullible, over-sensitive, immature, pedantic....