Published on 12, July, 2020
So, I have just come across this site after looking for more information on autism. I am a 34 year old mum to 7 year old twins (boy and girl) who are my absolute everything. Both my kids are now considered autistic but we are still waiting on a diagnosis and have been waiting for 3 years. We have with the schools help come to terms that my daughter is autistic and the school have been fab to try and get a diagnosis. I finally had a speech and language assessment for both of them last week and found out then that my son is autistic too. It felt like a bit of a smack in the face. Deep down I had a feeling that he was but as he didnt show the same signs as my daughter does, which are extreme, I kind of pushed it to the back of my mind. When I got told I felt pure guilt. Why??? I felt and still do feel like I have neglected him a bit when it comes to maybe seeing the signs as I have been so busy with my daughter and it has been so much hard work I think I made myself believe that having one 'normal child who supports his sister was what I could handle. At the moment I feel like I can't handle all this by myself. Their dad who lives with us has still not taken to autism and keeps telling them off for their little kinks (thats what we call them). I work nights so i can be there for both kids during the day and i am not sleeping coz all i am worried about what their life is going to be like having to live wih autism as all.i have ever heard is horror stories so am really looking for some inspirational people who have deat with this and can maybe explain to me.how I am supposed to cope with this and the worry about what' going to happen to them coz I want the best for my babies and I do everything I can to make sure that they have the best life possible. Thank you for letting me go on a bit.x
All I can say to help you is that everyone's "story" is different just as each person has an individual character/ personality so is our autism . On this forum alone and there are several forums and Facebook pages .. there any cross-section of people. Those in full time jobs and careers, those with friendships and relationships and their own children. There are people who can utilise the gifts of autism and be successful in their own way. There are as you can all too well imagine those with the opposites of those things. But as parents of children who have been diagnosed young you have chances to help your children that many on this forum never had. Im pleased for you that you have a supportive school and hopefully that will be the same for your son. As with everything in life we often have to take one step or follow through one part at a time as we cannot predict the future. My advice is to concentrate on giving your children the happiest childhood they can have and to be grounded in your love for them. Get what support you can. Make sure you use any respite that is offered to you for the well being of the whole family. Look on the main NAS website for their information and support. There is parent to parent support by phone I believe which might help if you can chat to other parents. See if there are any NAS groups in your area there is a directory on the main website.