Lately I'm trying really hard to admit when I can't follow a conversation. I do this by saying 'I don't understand,' and most people are really helpful and respond by explaining what they mean in a way that makes sense to me. It means I don't have to pretend I know what's going on when I have absolutely no idea.
This doesn't always work though, some people react by repeating the same instruction a bit louder and by the third or fourth time they're shouting and I still have no idea what's going on. I am not an idiot, I just need things reworded sometimes. If I say this to the other person it often makes things worse (but at least it makes me feel better).
I have no solution but I thought there might be a few people on here who relate! Are there any things you wish other people would do differently?
I wish people could talk slower. People often speak too fast.
Definitely relate to this. Tricky to find a phrase that works. Good for you working on this, I am too.
In a work setting I try saying "let me see, are you saying "this, that and the other"?. Then they have a chance to correct any misunderstanding.
With people I know "I don't get it" is enough to trigger a better explanation.
The Irish have a lovely expression "my head's away" sometimes using that (with an Irish accent!) and adding "so I missed some of what you said" is a gentle way to get another chance to understand.
I find it helps to run a quick diagnostic. Why am I finding it hard to follow this conversation? Is the lighting too bright, too noisy, does the person have strong perfume, am I tired, thirsty or hungry.? Is it possible to have this conversation at another time or in a different setting? Small changes can make a big difference to how well I can process conversation.
Keep up with your efforts. Clarity is out there.
I quite often get this at work,I now have the confidence since learning about autism to say"hold on I will write this down as my memory is useless," not exactly true but helps, I also feel more confident to say"ok so you want this done this way?" Quite often I have got it wrong but I have told my bosses I am ASD and to begin with they doubted me, I think they are now beginning to see the cap fits. I have educated them to just what autism is and how it effects me.
I also have some great work mates who I can call on to listen for me, I rely on them quite a lot but I am a fair understanding foreman so it works both ways.
Yes, can definitely relate to this too! As Aspergoose says, I also find that just to say "I don't get it" helps people to explain things in a way I understand. I get hugely distracted if the TV is on in the same room and usually just mute the sound so I can concentrate on someone's speech (rarely watch TV so this isn't a big problem).
I often had major problems interpreting people's instructions when I was working (currently not working here), and the suggestions here are very helpful - I'm going to make a note of them for when I re-enter employment.
People who just shout and think they'll then be understood are the idiots. They obviously don't realise it's the way they've explained something which is the problem...their problem!
I'm in love with the goose :-) where did you find the picture?
Since English isn't my first language I get this all the time, think British people are known for it (repeating the same louder, I mean), so why should it be different when you don't understand something for another reason... Language is a good excuse though :) Think my biggest problem with understanding (well, before moving to Norway) is that if I don't understand some little and often unimportant detail I keep thinking and wondering about that and then miss the things that did actually matter. Then people find it impolite and offensive because they think I got bored and stopped listening... In a way I would prefer if people thought I had a thick moment, at least they wouldn't get angry. Anyway, I also keep asking if I didn't get something, I can't have that, to not know what exactly someone meant, even if it's not something that's crucial for me to know.