Published on 12, July, 2020
At work/uni, I often get to the point of almost crying in front of people, and I have suicidal thoughts. I've refused antidepressants in the past, in case they affect my uni performance and/or I become dependent on them. I know my depression isn't purely biological, it's because of my inability to fit in in the world. I'm interested to hear the experiences of other autistic individuals with antidepressants. Did they help you, or did your low mood persist because of your autism? How difficult were the side effects, did they affect your ability to work/study? Did you become dependent on them?
Thanks for your responses :)
Depression is a very common co-occurring disorder with AS/ASD. I was very against taking anti-depressants for various reasons, but I've been on Citalopram several times (and currently) and I've found it useful. I find it difficult to determine when I'm feeling depressed because it kind-of creeps up on me, but I usually spot it when I realise I'm feeling down for no obvious reason. Unfortunately, repeated experience has helped me get better tuned into what is going on. I know I don't get physically addicted to Citalopram because I can be quite bad at remembering to take it, and a few times I've gone a week or so with not realising I'd forgot to take it and then generally though, oh well, I might as well come off it then.
I'd suggest talking it through with your GP and seeing if you can find one that suits you. Your GP should keep a close eye on you for the first month or so because they can take a while to work, plus sometimes things can feel worse before they feel better. Also not all the drugs suit everybody, so it may take a bit of experimentation before they find one that works for you where the side effects are OK. I don't feel any particular side effects that I'm aware of from the Citalopram.
If you're feeling down and it's impacting your life I'd definitely suggest at least having a chat with your GP.
I agree. I have chronic clinical depression and in addition to talking therapy and other coping treatments I have been taking Citalopram for many years. Before that I was taking Imipramine since my 20s, over 30 years ago. I have had no problems with side effects or dependency with either antidepressant and can recommend them for their stabilising effect. Depression is dreadful and can be crippling.
They had no impact upon me when I was studying criminology at night school/evening classes and not being depressed helped enormously.
Hi Windscale, thanks for this response, it's really useful :) It's especially encouraging to hear about your lack of dependence.
Did you experience your feelings getting worse before they got better? If so, how much worse is worse? That's a difficult question to answer I know, haha. Sometimes just now I become suicidal, so if it got worse things might end badly before they have the chance to get better.