Anti-anxiety meds


So I have always suffered with anxiety and low mood. This year I found out I am an Aspie.  Not just a little bit but a lot. 

Sometimes anxiety or sensory or both cause me to shake.  At night, like last night I wake up and I am in the foetal position rocking with anxiety.

So I am considering anti-anxiety meds. But...

1) I am worried they will change my personality for the worse and

2) as a side effect suicide is possible.

Has anyone been on these and what effects have they had.