A friend has just forwarded me this recent article. I found myself nodding my head a lot as I read it. The points on bullying and 'camouflaging' are particularly pertinent for me.
The Hidden Danger of Suicide in Autism
I think I'll go sick next week and go and see my GP. I don't really want to go down the route of medication - but I need something. I'm getting a lot of end-game thoughts. Anti-depressants can increase those, of course - I know that risk. I'll ask about medicinal cannabis. I'm not sure what the status is with that. I could go look it up. I think it's probably very truthful to say that if it wasn't for my cat here - following mum's passing - I probably wouldn't be here now.
This episode with my colleague has really brought me down. I'm starting to feel more and more alienated. Or you could say I'm alienating myself. That's how it must seem. I try my best to please people and I hate upsetting anyone. I'm going to deactivate my FB account for now, then think about deleting it. I can't go on like this. Social media has its great points. But the downsides are not good at all.
Hello. I'll be blunt: seems like an overreaction over something that happens all the time to a lot of people. Would you be going off sick just to avoid your colleague? I'd try to force myself to go in, and in some quiet moment make a bit light of it and put on a hurt tone: 'you defriended me' and see what she says (and be prepared for saying nothing and holding hands up in an exasperated and uninformative way).
(Edit: sorry, I realised you said she'd be away next week. Jumped to the wrong conclusion.)
I can't advise against making a GP appointment though.
Hope you and your cat have a good afternoon, and try to do something nice.
Cassandro said:I'll be blunt: seems like an overreaction over something that happens all the time to a lot of people.
This is true. It's why I've been told so many times in the past that I'm over-sensitive, and that I should just let it go over my head. I can't do that. Stuff like this, which many would look at and say 'So what?', hits me like a train. I think it's probably a lot worse because I'm feeling pretty frayed at the moment. Work is getting me down. I wouldn't go sick simply to avoid that colleague, but I find it very hard to work in an environment where someone has taken against me in some way. I admire people who can do it. Another colleague at work was reported by someone else about perceived abuse and faced a disciplinary - which was thrown out. They still work together, keeping it professional. I simply couldn't do that. If it happened to me, I'd have to leave.
Tom i don't think you (and I ) are over sensitive, personal comments or actions are meant personally. I would have to leave as well in that circumstance, if nothing else there could be no trust between those two colleagues.
If only people thought more about the full impact of their actions. But they don't. I make a jokey comment - and get unfriended and blocked without an explanation or a further word, and by someone I liked and trusted. It makes no sense. It's screwed me up.