We all get tired and stressed from work and we all definitely have our bad days and even bad jobs, but I am finding as time goes on I am coping less and less with work.
I have recently moved jobs due to numerous issues at my last place of work, but I am finding that I am constantly run down, fatigued, stressed and just generally feel unwell as a result of working. I am in my early thirties and I know we slow down and get tired with age, but I feel ill - not just tired.
My mental health is strained, I am suffering with anxiety and possibly depression, GI issues, skin complaints, respiratory problems, migraines, fatigue, muscles cramps/pain, joint pain, general illnesses etc etc.
Packing my job in is not an option as I have bills to pay, but I also want to work and like having purpose and responsibility - I just wish it didn't take so much out of me.
I have been looking at career changes, but at the moment I cannot financially afford the risks and even then I am not really sure what I could do that would alleviate these health issues.
Most people seem to breeze through life (ok slightly over dramatic) and get a weeks work done without a hitch and then make the most of the weekend. I spend my weekends and evenings a wreck, just trying to recover to start again. Are other people like this and just hide it better or is it me?
If I have to work until my late 60s until I retire, I am starting to think I won't make it anywhere near retirement at this rate.
chuckalicious said:I firmly believe that we all need to find jobs that work for us, rather than trying to fit a square peg into a round hole and trying to modify a "normal" role .
You may well be right. All this talk of reasonable adjustments may be nothing more than the logical extension of the lie, "you can be anything you want to be".
Even those of us who can get regular work can't seem to get permanent roles.
To me that is defeatist. I worked for a long time in a busy library on the front desk. I did that for 7 years but I remember seeing a conversation on an autism forum with autistic people agreeing that such a job would be impossible for a person with autism. Well, it isn't, but if you start of believing it is then you shut doors before you've even tried to open them. I was good at that job. It only ended because govt cuts shut the library.
My next job (the one I mentioned before) was working directly with students, some of whom had autism, some other disabilities, in their classes. Again, not something you would think a person with autism could do, but I was partly employed BECAUSE I had that empathy and I was really successful at that job. Unfortunately that was a temporary contract and it did get extended but then the funding ran out.
In both cases I had minor reasonable adjustments to timetables or whatever and I was good at my job. I don't believe in impossible. I'm now a full time student finishing a PhD. I was also told I would never go back to university but I have, twice.
In short, we should be able to do more things than people believe we can. Accepting outside views that we can't is just feeding into the prejudice. It *is* about finding the job that is right for you and that you can do - but my point is that it isn't right to limit what those jobs might or might not be able to be just because of prejudice and a lack of support in the employment world.
Ringorin said:To me that is defeatist.
It's not meant to be.
I'm a Chartered Engineer. I ran an engineering team in a pressured environment for nearly ten years. There was a business need to address customer line stop issues or RMAs within ~24 hours. Changes made by my engineers would be in consumer products rolling off that production line when it was restarted. We're talking shipments in millions of units. Many of the team were listed as contributors to internationally agreed standards.
Ringorin said:it isn't right to limit what those jobs might or might not be able to be just because of prejudice and a lack of support in the employment world.
No it isn’t. You just have to be able to jump the hurdles and keep your neck above the waterline and under the radar simultaneously.
Thats not being defeatist either, just realistic
I only work 4 days. I had the option of 5, but the difference - once stoppages are taken into account - would be minimal. I get working tax credit. And I have a small monthly amount (£80) from a pension I cashed in early. I just about manage on that, but I have no extras. I'm never likely to earn more now.
I'm seriously thinking of going sick next week. I think I've reached the point where I am losing the ability to function properly. I feel sick. I don't think I'm liked at work, and I don't find it easy being in an environment like that. I get paid for up to 3 weeks at full rate. I'll go see my GP, anyway. I'm really starting to lose my will. Life seems empty now.
There's no one size fits all. What I meant was that jobs that aren't a good fit for someone who is autistic and is struggling are rarely going to be made better by trying to make adjustments.
For example, when I was a software developer (which according to all the literature is supposed to be a great job for an aspie), the actual task of writing the code was great, but no job is just one task. To have taken me away from all the bits I struggled with would have made it impossible to do my job. So that job simply wasn't suitable.
You found a job which worked great for you and worked with your strengths even if those didn't match up with a standard aspie profile. Another aspie regardless of how positive their attitude was, may have been totally overwhelmed.
It's about finding what's right you, and being an aspie and knowing your strengths and limitations is what's important .
I got £18 an hour in my last role, but I'm nowhere near able to afford my own place. At any rate, my mother appreciates the help.
Well, fighter pilots are good at that sort of thing, but ASD is a disqualifying condition for joining the RAF.