Failing to care about myself

If I could spend the rest of my life in bed and simply just give up, I would... We are all dying, much like our own star. Getting brighter and brighter until it gets too much and collapses into small glowing object, a fraction of what it once was. Consciousness is the same. I love my lucid dreams, where I'm truely free from myself and the burden of existential burn out.

I've accepted this fate that immortality is not for us. So when do I get to leave to never have the need to feel better?