Every time I go out and do something, like shopping, browsing or take the kids out I am absolutely shattered after and fall asleep no matter how hard I try to stay awake. It really is quite annoying and I feel so silly having to go and lay down in the middle of the day
At the weekend my husband suggested taking the kids (5 of them) to Smyth's toy store, just to get out of the house and do something the children would enjoy. It was packed full of people! There was music on the speakers, sounds from all the toys and hundreds of voices all at the same time. Everybody was brushing into me and the kids were going mental, wanting to try every scooter they could find. I HATED IT! When we got back I fell asleep for a couple of hours!
Yesterday and today I have spent my mornings taking photos of Pre School kids and last week I did another Pre School. I have hundreds of photos to edit so they can order before Christmas but I am SO tired ZZzZZzzzzzzzz.. It's SO hard!How do you deal with fatigue and work?
Hi Lone. Sorry, I know it's not the best advice. I am exhausted all the time too. So much that I have no energy to do anything after work not even cook or exercise. Even yoga has become difficult. Although, I can't imagine how hard it must be with kids too.
Aside from being 90% coffee I'm always in bed by 9.30-10pm. On occasion it'll be earlier depending on how tired I am. I've gotten to the point where I know I need to make sacrifices for extra sleep. I can't function otherwise.
My sister understands, we talk about it all the time. she helps me by doing things like extra chores for me when I'm struggling.
Good question, I'm currently working on it.
It's funny you mention coffee Abigail, I've just given up coffee. I absolutely love it but if I'm not in balance, it does me more harm than good. It can keep me awake but I pay a high price for it so at the moment, I have decided to do without it.
I'm putting into practice what has worked for me in the past. These last 12 months have been a total burn out so no chance of doing much of anything, so I accepted that and went with it and eventually, my energy levels are coming back. I'm slowly eating more regularly and better food, this is still a work in progress but I am seeing changes.
I'm also working on getting a regular sleep and getting up time back so I got some sleeping tablets from the doctors today to help with this although I haven't used them yet. I'm moving towards daily exercise again although so far I think I'm managing once a week at the gym and one night doing a bit of swimming which is actually amazing compared to the last 12 months and even for a few years before that. I want into get back to exercise every morning and also getting outside to get fresh air everyday, but I need to take this slowly.
This is a lot, for me anyway, but it has worked for me in the past so I'm working back up to it. These are things I'm making as a priority as well as doing things I enjoy, and not just my latest obsession, for example, I'm joining a little art group as I want to do more drawing and maybe start painting.
It's early days and I am working hard not to push myself too much. I have had periods throughout my life where I have these burnouts so what I've realised is, I do too much of the things that drain me and not enough of the things that nourish me so my thinking is that if I change that around, I won't burn out so often and maybe when I feel myself getting to a point of burnout, I pull back before it happens because I don't want to get in this state again.
It's much more difficult when you have children. I also made an appointment to get my bloods done, particularly vitamin D and B12 and I'm taking vitamins (when I have the energy! lol). It's a slow process for me. I'm also bearing in mind what ayurveda say about exercise. They say we should only ever exercise to 50% of our capacity because it is supposed to energise us not wear us out, so if you can swim 10 lengths, swim 5 to start with and build from there.
I feel like I'm learning to walk again for the first time or something and this time I'm taking my time because I don't want to keep falling down. Oh, I am going to start having a bullet proof coffee in a morning, before exercise, but I don't feel I'm quite at that stage yet but when I am, I'll start my day with a bullet proof coffee. I've switched back to a whole food plant based diet and I'm really enjoying it. One thing is for definite, I will always from now on limit my time around people, that definitely drains me and I don't need draining. So it's all a bit of a work in progress for me at the minute but I feel like I'm heading in the right direction.
You have so much self-control, amazing! I have been thinking about giving up my tea to see if that makes a difference, but it's hard as those warm cups of comfort mean a lot to me. I have a phobia of deep water so I can't swim. I hate going to the gym and I can't even get myself to walk the dog :( Everything just seems really hard at the moment, especially as I have a lot more work than usual and deadlines make me freak out! It doesn't help that I don't sleep well at night, even the tiniest change in sound/temperature/light wakes me up.
To be honest, I just feel like going into hibernation.
Try not to be too hard on yourself, i have no idea how it's even possible to run a house and business with 5 kids?! I honestly don't believe i could do that. My mum was really tired when she was low on iron, so maybe you could check your iron levels. I would say try to make sure you do something to relax to try to sleep better at night, but i don't suppose you have time...maybe just some breathing exercises or visualisation for 2 minutes (even as i type that i think it must be obvious i'm not a mother!). If you have a garden perhaps spend a few minutes out there for some fresh air. Oh, you might be dehydrated, that makes me feel sleepy. Or your blood sugar might be crashing, so you could research that. Think that's all i can think of at the moment! Probably not anything you've not already tried!
Thank you, I never thought about dehydration leading to fatigue. I will try and drink more. Also, I only have 2 kids but my husband has..... Hold on...... 7! 2 adults and 5 smaller ones. So it's only at the weekend we have a lot
Wow! This is an amazing thread so much I can relate to! I've just recently "passed" my initial ASD tests and am currently waiting for assessment for formal diagnosis. Energy levels have always been massive issue for me even as a child my sleeping wasn't great. I too find being around people particularly draining i work full time hour's over four days a week which gives me a day off in the week (I'm an administrator in a hospital and condensed hours are the norm) working 9+ shifts may sound crazy but I've actually found this helpful as I have Wednesdays off so only have two consecutive days off working (work Mon,Tues, Thurs,Fri) most days I could quite easily turn loafing and sofa snoozing into an Olympic sport lol! However since I've changed working hours from traditional 9-5 Mon-Fri to My current condensed shifts I'm gradually finding it easier to function. Like blueray I've also been trying to exercise more - I started off with small goals of a 10 min walk, then walking instead of driving short journey, I'm now using a free app I downloaded to train to run 5km. Gradually finding energy levels and quality of sleep improving, I'm not at all a sporty person (always the last kid to get picked for teams) but after many an abandoned attempt to join a gym, take up a sport etc i found something I like doing that a) I like doing, b) is cheep, c) I can fit into my day - running I've found it helps me wind down. coffee makes me sleepy believe or not! But I love it and find it comforting but not great beverage option during the day for me lol! I switched to decaff but found it joyless so just drink my favourite black sugary coffee once a day and drink plenty of water and this has helped. not sure where I'm going with all this but I think what I'm trying to say is I've found that small things all add up, 5 mins meditation when I wake up, cutting myself some slack by being kind to myself by not feeling guilty for.needing to take some down time useful, looking a what and when I eat , exercising etc I guess half the battle is finding what works for you. Phew! Hope some of this is useful ....
Tiredness can be caused by many things.
Sometimes things that make one person tired make someone else euphoric.
There's physical work, mental worry, coping with problems, worrying about the future, lack of exercise, dehydration, lack of sleep, too much sleep, physical illnesses etc
Regular Sleep is very important. Plan to get enough by going to bed at a reasonable hour. If you get it right you will feel refreshed in the morning. I, for example have very bad sleeping patterns. I often wake up exhausted. Going to sleep at 3am and getting up at 7. I then fall asleep during the day, on buses, trains, in front of the TV. Sleeping tablets are dangerous because of the risk of overdose/suicide.
Regular meals also help to relax, as is having breakfast and remember to keep hydrated by just drinking water.
Physical exercise can also help tiredness as long as it's not to rigourous. If you're fitter you can cope better. Physical health can help mental health is what my psychiatrist quoted.
And get regular blood tests. Several years ago when I was tiring very quickly, multiple blood tests eventually found that I had a low red blood cell count caused by a low iron level in my blood. I was anaemic.
'I just feel like going into hibernation' - this is exactly how I feel today even though I've been in hibernation for the last 12 months. I thought I was coming out of it and I am doing a lot more but it's just so tiring and it's like every time I come into contact with someone I go into this stupid default mode that 'I'm ok' when I'm not. I did admit that to the nurse today but as soon as I get talking it's as if I'm ok again when I'm not. It's so confusing, annoying and frustrating. It's so much easier in hibernation but then I'm scared I'll never come out of it. I wish I could help you. I do have a lot of self control and I'm sure it's going to help me in the long run but I feel like I've wasted so much of my life and now I know what the problem is, I just want to get on with it but can't. Arrggggghhhhhh I did make it to the swimming baths again last night, which is good but I haven't been back to the gym yet, it just feels like too much hard work sometimes :(
@ Queenie Redshoes ~ yes, that is useful and gives me hope. I used to work as a Social Worker and I remember doing my hours over 4 days was helpful but I still don't think I can go back to that work. I know what you mean about decaf, I tried that as I love cappuccino but I too found it joyless and was convinced it didn't taste as good so went back to full strength but at present I know I can't cope with it. Sometimes it makes me sleepy, which I don't mind but when it makes me high, it's more than I can handle just now. I too love running and did the 5 k thing but have started from the beginning again although have only been out once recently. I suppose it's small steps which is what I'm struggling with, I just want to be ok NOW lol! Just coming on here and reading your replies has made me feel better and I've got a better perspective but I think I'll follow your lead and start to walk places instead of using the car all the time. I did think about doing that the other day then forgot!!! It sounds like your getting a handle on it, which gives me hope. Thank you.
I've had some bloods taken today, I asked them to check my iron levels and vitamin D levels so they said they'd check the whole lot while they're at it.
Your list of possible reasons is helpful, I'm coping with problems and worrying about the future, wondering when I'm going to come out of this burn out and worrying that whatever I do in the future is going to result in the same thing or if I'm going to be able to cope with work and still try to have a life! I can see that I am worrying more that I realise. Physical exercise, a good sleeping pattern and regular meals has always helped so that's what I'm trying to get back to and even though it doesn't feel like it sometimes, I am actually doing more than I have done in the last 12 months, even though it doesn't seem like much. I'm still not eating great or enough some days but some days I'm eating fairly well which is an improvement and most days I'm keeping hydrated and I'm getting out of bed every day so I am making progress.