Hi :) Hope everybody is well. I've had asperger's well diagnosed about 22 years ago (35 now)
Now there's been a change in my home circumstances (still live with my folks) but that's about to change. How did people.............handle it? (if they had these sort of things going on in their life) I know...............I have been struggling to be honest (Not going to deny that) especially with all the delay's i've had with this (had pretty bad thoughts I won't go into) I got a call the other day though saying that something had finally been found (looks like I have accepted) but now that's going to likely cause other anxiety's in me you know dealing with the rent erm...........money side of the situation and obviously how to look after myself (I have been promised support though but not sure as to what extent it will be at the moment)
Hope this sounds all OK...................?
Hello welcome aboard,I am no expert in this area but I like to think if the support is there for you then things will fall into place, it may take a while and there will be periods of time when anxiety builds up,will your parents be fairly local? Or at least at the end of a phone?
Anything important like rent then start writing a to do list or get mum or dad to write it for you, when my daughter went to university my wife wrote everything down for her and did a budget and spending list,and she is neurotypical apart from dyslexia,she can read and write.
It is a big thing for any child moving out of the home so you are not alone in feeling nervous. I assume the place they have found is suited to your needs?
I am sure others better informed on here will give you specific advice better than me.
I just wanted you to know you are experiencing what a lot of young adults go through,you have specific needs and challenges but don't be afraid to ask on here if anything isn't obvious.
take care and keep us updated.
It's going to be a small 1 bedroom bungalow I believe (I have street view'd it) it looks more than ideal for me. I have had meetings with the people from the council erm the benefits.................maximiser I think (they told me that rent would be more or less nothing same with council tax I think) I'm not looking for anything big or huge just when certain um things happen (despite the asperger's) you feel it's time to look for your own place um..........of course I will continue to let people know (think it';s more the initial I get in erm get settled then it's trying to help me substain long term you know) I think i'm going to have teams coming in I do know it's not going to be one of these they going to give me the keys and that's it. I know I wouldn't cope with that
Hi that sounds great,I am very happy for you,it will be a challenge but take one day at a time and try setting yourself some reminder notes, having. Routine even if it isn't a rigid one will help you know when to expect certain things like money coming in,how much and then get help deciding the order of importance for spending it,
Even setting a time to have breakfast and dinner,it helps to break the day into manageable parts, far to easy to just forget it's dinner time,it may not seem important but going without food will not be good for you.
preparing something to eat means giving some thought as to what to buy,how long will it stay fresh, a good thing to learn about from maybe someone on the team,it needn't be a full roast dinner but just buying the right ingredients and preparing it can be very satisfying.and healthy too.
please let us know how things are going.you should never feel afraid to ask even things that seem silly.everybody has to learn and we are here to help you.
If you struggle to recall verbal stuff such as the amount of rent etc you will get in terms of assistance, simply say "please can I have this information in writing", it's a common request and is helpful for you to be able to plan.
Another good resource is Citizens Advice Bureau who could find someone to help you set up a budget for your expenses. It is OK today disclose to people saying "I have ASD and I might need to ask some pretty obvious questions, because I know there are times when I don't understand simple stuff.
Although change is scary, can you think of some positive things about your new living arrangements? The one I would find best is only me to make mess!!!
Hope you are all well. Received something positive on the phone about half an hour ago. I've arranged a viewing :) The house is getting repaired just now but a viewing is going to happen. Now I will say though Saturday night had a bit of a tiffy with a friend on the phone they believe I will struggle with all of this (the looking after myself part they're more worried about although I strongly suspect they think because i'm moving means I will be out of their lives. I know that won't happen and they seem convinced that after the council support initially.............they think that the council will turn on me and leave me to it (and charge me for the care I am going to get) they couldn't do that to me surely............................
sorry if i'm quoting other peopke unintentonally btw not sure how this place works to reply to things on it's own without quoting
It's a big step, but something you must go through. I left home when I was really young, although I had an abusive father, so it was my escape, and that felt wonderful. I too was scared of rent, it is good to keep on top of your bank statements. Try and stick to one bank account and one savings account, have the savings account with a different bank. If there's some problem with your main account (card stolen), then you have some backup finances to tide you by until replacement card turns up. I would Check them every month, and work what budget you have for living expense and you will need a bit more spare cash for unexpected things. When you have some confidence with your budget, start moving some cash to your savings account, but make sure you keep a reasonable balance (float) in your main account to avoid charges if you go overdrawn. Try and get an overdraft, then if you do go overdrawn, the charges will be much lower. Try and get your rent payment date to tie up just after a pay date
Just some suggestions
Hi everyone. I hope you are well. I apologise for not getting back to anyone on here. Things have moved on for me quite dramatically. I have had my bad days and my good days but the last week or so well 2 and a half weeks have been like whoah. For a start I have had some frustrations (my support assessment got cancelled once was rescheduled for 2 days later that did annoy me as I do like my routine and plans) but that has happened and what not. This week though has been the one. I had had another bad day on Tuesday so I did email my contact whose dealing with this to find out what is happening. Thursday (Yesterday) My contact and her well one of her assistants met me at the house and I viewed it for the first time. I've completely fallen in love with it. The living room and my bedroom are huge and I have a wetroom type of shower so minimal cleaning will be required. I have said though that I would rather wait and move in (let the council discuss the community grants to fill up my house with furniture and carpets) and wait to I get certain things sorted out (my gas and electricity tarriff and broadband which I discovered I can get virgin media where I am so that will make a dramatic difference) and also I was given the keys to the place too. Today (Friday) I had another meeting to get my ESA sorted (increase that by 15 per week a extra 60 a month) that will help quite a bit too. All positive moves. I am now awaiting to hear from someone from the simon community (a local charity in Glasgow) to carry out another assessment with me to get all the support from their end set in motion. All in all I am a lot happier than I have been in such a liong time.
All sounds good,well done for getting through all of that,you are amazing.Enjoy your new freedom,just remember there is a lot of new things in your life,just take it one step at a time,even when things look impossibly hard you will cope,I have no doubt.
well done you.
Thank you :) This week i'm not going to deny has been a eye opener. I know this is now about to happen and very soon. The excitement is building for me :)