Published on 12, July, 2020
I recently had an assessment through my local authority -- I've long suspected I'm on the spectrum, but only found out a couple of years ago that I could self-refer.EQ and AQ scores came back with significant indicators, my ADOS test also showed that I am autistic, but the diagnosing psychiatrist disagreed with all of it.
So, they decided not to diagnose me because:
1. They could not get enough of my developmental history (parents are dead)
2. I didn't demonstrate bad enough meltdowns or intense special interests (which was completely untrue)
--- The week before the meeting I had a meltdown where I accused my girlfriend of 'ruining my life' because she didn't want me to use my old chopping board!
--- During the assessment I had a new camera (special interest) in my pocket and was absolutely aching to talk about it, but resisted due to masking and previous experiences.
They also ignored my extreme sensitivity to sharp noises, good childhood memory, fascination with numbers, repetitive eating, childhood toe walking, fake eye contact, stimming, childhood food issues, childhood tantrums over my haircuts, bullying and advanced capabilities with tech etc.
I got the impression they were leaning more towards Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder, in spite of these issues being with me my whole life, and me not quite matching the OCPD criteria.
Anyway, I had a meltdown in the practice, and stormed out in a state of overwhelm -- and then sat in my car for an hour while I calmed down! Part of me is embarrassed, but another part is glad they got to see me in full blown crazy!
The service have contacted me, to check I was safe, and encouraged me to write in, explaining what I thought was wrong -- and so I wrote an 11 page essay (!) trying to outline all my grievances -- they're then supposed to have phoned me on Thursday or Friday, which just led to me pacing all day in anticipation (the call did not come).
I think, at the best I have comorbidity with personality disorders, but that doesn't explain the issues being with me my whole life -- and right now it's like being treated as an unreliable witness to my own experience and it's sent me into crisis.
What are other people's experience with local authority services -- I don't want to think of them as incompetent, but if everything I know about myself points to ASD, then what exactly has gone wrong, and how do I get a second opinion anyway?
I have edited out my original comment as I wasn't happy with it - but you can read it in your email notifications - you ought to be able to get a second opinion on the NHS - if you have a problem with one NHS GP, you can try another, the same ought to be true with psychologists/psychiatrists - whether it is though, I have no idea.
The service said I was welcome to continue to self-diagnose -- but that's not the point at all, I don't want an identity, I want focused help on the executive functioning I've struggled for years (I'm 53).Anyway, we shall see what happens next, but I will certainly ask for a second opinion, unless they revise the way they process what they already know about me.
There are certain things that, without a diagnosis, I'll just be told to get over myself.Like, I'm in a council flat and removed all my smoke alarms because of the noise they make if I cook anything smoky -- they since came round for a fire inspection, insisted I had some new ones, which I promptly took down again.I had similar in my last home where they refused to do any work unless I had them installed.I know that's a tiny example, and I know there are risks with the above, but I've got a whole heap of little issues that can make me seem entitled, when really its extreme sensitivity to sharp sounds.
I think you can ask social services to assess your needs if you need help - they don't always base things like social services support and benefits on a diagnosis - although I suppose that one does help and I can fully appreciate why you want a diagnosis. I wish you luck with getting some more answers from your local autism service or from someone else anyway.