Published on 12, July, 2020
I tried and tried to find the reply JuniperFromGallifrey gave me but cannot. So I am posting this information hoping to contact them. It is what we were talking about, women not having power in history. It is an article by Tara Mohr called Learning to Love Criticism in the New York Times if you want to look it up. It is the paragraph starting:
"There's another, deeper factor that informs women's relationship to criticism and praise."
I really wish this forum was nice and clear like the PHP forums. I search and search for people's replies, then the reply button doesn't appear. Sooooo frustrating.
Oh hi!!! How strange. I'll try to friend you :)
After refreshing the page a few times, the reply button appears! There, we are friends now!
I think I've had better luck on Chrome than Safari. Sometimes this is the case for various websites. And what a good article!
I often describe my younger self as not having 'agency' - and this is exactly what this is about. But I also had a youth riddled with just not comprehending the social structures and use of language around me. And in the house I grew up in criticism was not kind or affirming. It was debilitating. To my own credit and maybe un-recognised wee spectrummy me (LOL) found ways to Escape, created distance - probably recognised certain typical ways of engaging that I felt disgust by.
I think in my late 20's I met humans who where kind when they used a type of critique & seemed to care. This obviously changed my expectations. But, yes, add a difficulty with social nuances and language and getting it wrong meant being homeless!
I preach the Gospel according to Firefox.