How can i make my aspie husband happy?

Hi guys,

My husband is an aspie. He's very sweet and deep and perfect ^^, but he is always stressed (especially when he has to interract with others or when je gets out of his daily routine), and he has depression and anxiety tendencies.

Do you have any ideas how can i help him in order to be less stressed?

  1. Thank you im advance!:)
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  • i guess one way, if you're not already doing it, is to ask him "what would make this bearable?" if there is an unbearable or anxiety inducing situation. Not to indulge him but to see if there is one thing that would really help or de-stress. For example, if I'm going somewhere where there will be a lot of people, I need an escape route or a time when it's acceptable to leave. Or to explore a place on google maps before actually going there. 

  • thanks a lot, <3 it seems very helpful, i will do that. if you dont mind, what do you mean by escape route?

  • It could be a quiet place to go and shut the door if i am feeling a meltdown or anxiety attack coming on. Example - a noisy shopping precinct  - where is my "quiet place".   Hopefully not always the toilets, lol.      In some cases it could even be an excuse to make so i can leave.  Example: a work night out - how to politely make an excuse and go at 9pm for example.  By thinking a little about it in advance, often I don't even need it.  Just like a fire drill.   Those plans might feel like a big palaver at first but soon become integrated into daily life. 

    All aspies are different but I need to know the layout of a place and make contingency plans for different scenarios. I also need to plan some alone-time if it has been busy.   My husband has got used to this quite quickly.  

    The important thing is to ask, like coaching, help him to find the "one thing that would help", he might know it but not be aware that he does.

    Doing this together will surely help, but please take care of yourself and remember that you are half of the relationship.   You can even try it for your own needs to make sure his needs don't take over everything. 

  • i am so glad i asked you ^^. you have me a lot of good ideas. bless you <3

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