Is that sometimes facts can be interspersed with a negative picture of you that reflects a deep rooted antipathy/resentment towards you.
A picture that is removed from how things actually were. It can be as much about passing negative comment as it can be about providing
supporting details to help with your assessment. That's the situation with the letter my sister wrote.
Surely you filter all of the evidence supplied? My mum was in total denial - I wouldn't have bothered asking her.
Perhaps I should have done, but didn't. My sister is not in denial that there are things that point to possible ASD, but she paints a very negative picture of me within that. Like it's a character/personality fault as much as anything else.
Then that's a trait of ASD - you were given an instruction and completed it - it never occured to you that others would not be supportive - you could add that as more evidence.
One of the issues we had we the assessments, both my older son and I, was that many of the questions seem designed to elicit negative information and that, once the ball is rolling, it becomes easier to add to that and keep it all in the same vein.
I didn't get a report myself, just a diagnosis letter (the NHS at it's finest!) but the detailed report that my son received after his private assessment came with a stern warning from the lead psychologist - to remember when reading the report that this in no way reflects the totality of you. The process is simply zooming in on the ways in which you meet the diagnostic criteria and these are framed in negative terms - the typical deficits approach of the DSM. She reminded him before letting him have sight of the report of all of his stengths and aptitudes and that a "whole person" report would have looked very different.
I cannot of course say that there's no antipathy/resentment reflected in your sister's negative comments - your gut feeling is probably informed by years of experience with your family - but my thoughts are that the assessment process might also contribute and encourage this bringing forth of the negatives. I certainly felt that way as a parent when they interviewed me about my son. It felt similar to when I complete DWP forms. They upset me because the picture is completely negative. And then I worry about what my sons might think if/when they read this stuff. I'd ideally want to go back and balance it all up with the missing positives but, of course, the process doesn't call for that.
I can understand the need to pinpoint negatives in terms of how something affects you. However these were more indicative of providing what she saw as character/personality flaws. The letter combined factual stuff that may support a diagnosis with a negative portrayal of me as a person.
Sounds very disheartening, to say the least. Has your sister said anything about it? in my son's case, I would feel the need to counter it all by mentioning the positives but I guess much depends on the person and their understanding of the situation and its possible effects on you.
I'm sorry to hear that your sister's report was negative. As bad as that is though, the clinicians carrying out the assessment will have a lot of experience dealing with this type of thing and will be more than able to filter what they are reading and pick out the bits that are relevant to ASD and leave the bits that are just your sister making a nasty comment. They may still ask you about it in your next assessment, but you could use it to provide further evidence of ASD, such as not being able to see things from your sister's perspective or understand what made her write such things.
I suppose I could have edited it before sending it to my stepdaughter to print out for me. I didn't think to do so though. There's been no further feedback from my sister.
Yes- I guess they must get their fare share of negative comments from other family members. There's still quite a lot of stigma when it comes to ASD.
This where I find the process difficult - your family are suddenly needed to fill in forms for something they may deny or don't understand and their accidental answers could scupper your application.