Published on 12, July, 2020
Am I wrong in feeling offended that a task I've been performing for over a year has now been assigned to someone else, with someone other than myself supervising them?
Said supervisor hasn't consulted me and has disregarded my documentation / process.
Feels like a massive FU to me.
My work colleague tells me not to take it personally.
I'm growing tired of people spouting things like...
"Don't take it personally", "You're not the only one this affects", "I don't understand your problem", etc.
Management at work do my head in.
Can I start by saying there is no right or wrong with feelings. It is ok to feel angry, sad, jealous, offended. What ever the emotion is. Emotions are perfectly natural and we can't really control how we feel. The part that matters is what we do with those emotions and how we behave when we feel them. For example it would be wrong if you went to this other person and started shouting at them because they were working on your task.
I personally do struggle with these things a little and I do worry that I've done something wrong in order for it to be changed. There could be many, many reasons for this change though.
The way I see it is you've got a couple of options. You can accept it, try to get past feeling offended and move on. Or you can ask management why.
Nah I didn't start having a tantrum and being rude to people.
I just felt upset and offended given that I'd been doing it for over a year and everyone seemed happy with my work.
I discussed it via IM with a couple of colleagues whose response was to not take it personally - this is something I struggle with massively.
It's a trait I have in common with my mother, who I suspect is also on the spectrum, amongst other things.
It's called self obsession and when you accept that, you will no longer struggle with it and instead you will learn to make the best of it, the above article probably explains it better than me and it would be worth your time to read it because it seems that nobody has explained what autism is, to you and if you don't identify, then you know that you're either not on the spectrum or you are on the mild end of the spectrum, so to speak, where people generally get looked over for a diagnosis.
Thank you but it’s ok, I’m leaving. I’ll repeat what I’ve said to the others because yes, I am self obsessed, I am not mildly autistic, I am full on autistic, I fit the description perfectly, I am autistic and although I didn’t pick up on it before and I thought it was funny, I get it now, I don’t belong here. Thank you and I’m sorry for any harm caused, I don’t have that strength or the ability to monitor my every word so I’ll leave and if this day continues this way, you might get really lucky and I might never have the chance to come here again, which would at least keep you guys happy and I’d rather do that than live in a lonely world where I’m not welcome anywhere. I really do apologise.
Don’t worry, you all might just get lucky. I’ve just come through one suicidal episode, maybe not being accepted, even in the autism community, might just be the trigger that makes me successful. Keep your fingers crossed that something upsets me today and you might hit jack pot ~ blueray, the self obsessed, clearly severely autistic but unconditionally loving autistic person has finally departed this earth plane, then you can all say, thank god.
I get the message, thank you for spelling it out for me, I really do appreciate that, I really am autistic so I honestly don’t pick up on this ***, but you spelled it out loud and clear and I’m autistic but not sTupi d, I can understand I’M NOT WELCOME! I get it Thank you
That’s ok, it isn’t the first time and the moderators are always very supportive with me, they understand that I’m autistic and they do what they can to support me. And maybe I am the only autistic person here.
SciFiGreg Don't take that drastic action unless you need to.
This thread has gone toxic due to a couple of posts but there's still support here.
If possible just get this thread locked/deleted and reach out directly to anyone who has been helpful.
Maximum spoons, people...
Can you please take it round the back of the local Wetherspoons then please. Also, surely moderators would not be needed if we were able to regulate and moderate our own behaviour.
Ellie
(Currently using the forum having recently gone through her autism assessment and awaiting the response and needing the support. Also having fled an abusive relationship and awaiting a police decision to charge and needing folk here as rather isolated her. The forum is very important to her at present....
Understandably the degree of aggression I am finding both unsettling and upsetting.)
Bye
This has now reached a point where this forum is unhealthy for me.
I will therefore be deactivating my account.
I can’t sit back and watch a gang of bully’s take it out on one person. I Always stand up to gangs of bullying folk. i
This Place Is Wide Open to trolls and abuse.
Yes - I guess. 32.. ?
Dint worry - all people born after 1980 are the PC brigade. Responsible partly for the modern collapse of the UK
The community is fake and full of nasty stuff
it’s designed to get you all arguing.
Blueray - without doubt is the most aware autistic about autism I’ve ever known.
She has found herself - most humans never do.
If you wanna be happy - listen to her.
She has got pure soul and spirit bursting from her heart.
Whether or not she annoys you - that is Your problem not hers.
You’d do well not to gang up on a loving autistic being.
Pack it in boys. Please... if this is how this community is going it is going to lose people who seriously rely on support here
Oh great another troll.
Do me a favour and stop before you start.
You’re obviously a Snow Flake? Are you under 38 treats old?
Why not?
I gave him plenty of opportunity to stop, if that's refused then I'm afraid I become very direct and yes perhaps rude.
I'm not apologizing for it given that I offered a solution and that he willingly irritated me to a point where his input contributed to my rage yesterday.
Um... are you still sticking to this comment
”Piss off you inflammatory twat.” in relation to BlueRay?
like all aspies we have our blind spots and can cause offence.
Would it be prudent to keep to the topic of the original post.
best wishes
Ellie the arsehole x
Already did that after BlueRay's initial response.
He's still around being a goon though.
His posts were not directly responsible for but definitely contributed to two rage meltdowns I had yesterday.
Ouch.
Former Member I'm afraid I've reported you for abusive behaviour.
You are blatantly trolling SciFiGreg in what should be a safe space.
There's only one self-obsessed person here and that's you.
Sorry, I can’t help it, you make my day seriously though, I do actually know it’s only your autism that’s talking, and not you, so I don’t take offence, far from it, this thread has had me in stitches. But seriously, I really do wish you would read the article I linked or talk to somebody about how autism actually affects you because I promise you, you can rid yourself of that horrible obsessive thinking and taking things so personally. How do I know? - because with help, I am no longer stuck in that mind trap of spiralling destructive thinking, I’m still autistic, I still blurt things out and say them in my way, which upsets about 99% of the population, 99% of the time, so learning about autism doesn’t change who you are but it can help take away the horrible bits and some bits, well, we have to live with some bits but we can work on those as well with the right information/education and support. I don’t want anybody to be stuck in that horrible autistic obsessive compulsive black and white catastrophic thinking, but yeah, I do tend to say it as it is, or obviously, as I see it. Good luck, I feel quite sure there’s nothing at all wrong with your work.