Am I wrong to feel offended by...

If you want to feel offended, go ahead, there's no right or wrong to it.

I, personally, would instead ask, does it benefit me to be offended?

It is common for autistic people to take offence at things like this because we live in our own little worlds so we think the world evolves around us, therefore anything that happens around us, we think it is all about us and we therefore take it personally and feel offended. NT people are generally not as self obsessed as we are and therefore they are able to not take it personally and not be offended and they're able to see clearly that, even if they don't like the changes, they can see that they have absolutely nothing at all to do with them but in fact, something much bigger than them, like they have pointed out, you are not the only one that the changes effect.

So go ahead, if you want to take it personally, like you're the centre of the universe, by all means kick and scream like a two year old, who also thinks they're the centre of the universe and if it works for you, there's no right or wrong and no judgment. You don't need anybody's permission to be p****d off. And I'm sure you equally do the heads in of the management at your work, it's just how it goes, life is but a mirror. But yeah, get that anger out one way or another and if blaming someone else works for you and makes you happy, go for it. The others who you blame won't care, because they know it's not actually true and they'll just think you're acting like a two year old or something, unless they know you're autistic and then they can be much more open with you, maybe?

Anyway, no. it's not wrong to feel offended, that's your feeling, your choice and you can feel what you want.

A bit harsh.

Your use of language and your implication that I'm  having a tantrum like a 2 years offends me.

You don't know me, so I'll thank you not to generalise.

I'm not generalizing, show me an autistic person who doesn't live in their own bubble! And that's me added to the list of people who offend you then :)

I'm not generalizing, show me an autistic person who doesn't live in their own bubble! And that's me added to the list of people who offend you then :)

Me. I don’t live in my own bubble. I have a thriving social life and I understand humility, discretion and other people’s feelings. I got assaulted by a bouncer on my birthday and all my NT friends said to let it go as though it is so easy. Does that mean I live in my own bubble? No it means that external stimuli can overload someone with autism. I feel violated and confused because someone who has no right to lay hands on me while I am waiting patiently for my friend to pay for me to enter a club as he had offered, does so anyway. It is a criminal offence and yet the police won’t follow it up. 

It’s them not us who are disabled if they design a system which is supposedly inflexible but then conveniently always seems to be flexible when it’s convenient to them. They are inconsistent without any valid reason and they have the audacity to further fuel their ego’s and further their assumption that because they are the majority they are automatically the correctly functioning individuals. In my opinion people who aren’t inconsistent and can’t make their minds up are the disabled ones. We struggle because we are the minority, not the disabled. There is a difference. 

Former Member Honestly? I think you've completely misunderstood that article.

For a start it's framed as a question, not a statement: "Autism – ‘autos’: literally, a total focus on the self?"

Then it talks about 'self-focus' rather than 'self-obsession', being focussed on yourself - essentially on something you can control.

It also rolls out the old saw that Autists aren't interested in other people because "they don't have empathy..." which I think is now widely discredited and there's a good argument that we have too much empathy which contributes to sensory/emotional overload.

The original (Kanner) derivation of 'Autism' from 'Autos' = 'Self' was related to the fact that the patients deemed to be 'Autistic' seemed happier when not forced to engage with others... again, I think this 'withdrawal' is exactly that - moving away from the stress and overload that interaction with others brings rather than 'toward' the self.

A bacteria that moved away from an acidic environment that it found 'harmful' would be described as 'acidophobic' but it would be inaccurate to infer that it was 'alkaliphilic' i.e. movement away from one thing does not infer an attraction to its opposite.

Self-obsession is being "excessively preoccupied with one's own life and circumstances; thinking only about oneself."

That's not what SciFiGreg has described.

He's saying "I feel like I've been treated unfairly and I'm pissed off about it... and it's being made worse by people suggesting I just 'get over it'..."

The article you refer to says in the conclusion:

"People with AS may have trouble empathising, which imprisons them inside their own self, but they are frequently highly moral individuals, who think deeply about how – in novelist Nick Hornby’s words – to be good. Through their good logic, they typically have a strong sense of justice, for others as well as for the self.

I'd argue that it's Greg's sense of injustice that's been triggered and this is difficult to 'get over' - I have the same issue i.e. when what is 'right' or 'fair' is ignored for the sake of convenience or 'politics' or simple incompetence it drives me nuts... that's not me being self-obsessed, it's me being frustrated that things aren't how they should be and no-one else seeming to care.

I’m not laughing today. I'm sorry, I didn’t get it before, but I do now. I might be autistic but I’m not stupid and when people talk straight to me, I get it. I get it, I’m not welcome here. I’m sorry, I apologise and I’ll take your advice and leave. 

I’ll copy what I wrote to somebody else, with the same message 

Don’t worry, you all might just get lucky. I’ve just come through one suicidal episode, maybe not being accepted, even in the autism community, might just be the trigger that makes me successful. Keep your fingers crossed that something upsets me today and you might hit jack pot ~ blueray, the self obsessed, clearly severely autistic but unconditionally loving autistic person has finally departed this earth plane, then you can all say, thank god.

I get the message, thank you for spelling it out for me, I really do appreciate that, I really am autistic so I honestly don’t pick up on this ***, but you spelled it out loud and clear and I’m autistic but not sTupi d, I can understand I’M NOT WELCOME! I get it  Thank you 

I'm not taking sides but surely we are better people than this and must be mindful that the purpose of the forum is to have a place that we feel secure to raise concerns, worries, seek support and be part of a network and feel less marginalised.

We have been here before, where it all becomes very Lord of the Flies.  Its ugly.  

Surely if you do not agree with someone's post, you are not duty bound to reply.  Also bear in mind that although there can be great synergy of experience on the forum our views are often very subjective.... but please do not resort to verbal abuse.  Question that viewpoint, find out how it was arrived at, or chose to ignore it.

Ellie and her female genitalia signing off.

Maybe a violent door?? Ffs

Guys - this makes me wanna puke! 

Youre all ganging up like NTs do! It’s sinply wrong. If you don’t agree - perhaps you’re not autistic. Blue ray is spot on. 

I’m a selfish mfer. Of course We ALL are. 

If if you think otherwise. Stop trying to be NT. 

thats the whole hole issue with this piece of shite site. 

Autistics trying to please NTs. Forget it folks. 

NTs and autistics are like comparing a cat with a dog. We are a different species. The autistics who realise this are enlightened and live in Heaven in Earth mostly. Awe and wonder. 

Tone?? Are you kidding? This Is a forum. I can’t hear any tone at all. 

Maybe this article will help you understand yourself a little better. Some of the wording is a little out dated but it's still pretty accurate. And if you don't identify, then as it says, you could still be somewhere on the spectrum but it isn't bothering you enough for you to get a diagnosis, which is what the article describes, or for want of a better word, you are at the mild end of the spectrum, which would explain why you were all getting so upset. I'm full on autistic so I identify totally with this description, but you're right, there are clearly others who are on the fringes of the spectrum who don't identify, which explains why you are all so upset so maybe you would read this article and learn nothing at all because it's not describing you, it's describing somebody at the more so called severe end of the spectrum, within the scope of Asperger's as it was known when the article was written. In which case, I apologize, I thought you had all been diagnosed with autism. 

http://www.autismtruths.org/pdf/Autism%20-%20'autos'%20%20Literally%20a%20total%20focus%20on%20the%20self%20-%20Simon%20Baron-Cohen.pdf

hahaha I'm sorry but I can't help myself, this is hilarious, I know I shouldn't laugh but hey, I'm autistic as well and this is my space as well. If you think that I have low self esteem you have clearly not read any of my posts. What do you think autism is? 

And for the record, I'm not speaking for anybody other than myself, stop taking things so personally and why the heck have you brought your kids into this? lol! 

If you think you are degraded for being autistic, that's your view, I would say it is you therefore that has low self esteem, I accept myself with open arms, my self obsession makes me the kindest person I know. I love all people unconditionally, I don't know how not to and I don't take offence from anything anybody on this planet could say, how is that even possible? How can a stereotype damage somebody, unless they believe it to be true about themselves and it's something they don't like but then again, how can somebody not like themselves? That's beyond my comprehension. If you don't like yourself you're gonna have a hard time in life because you can't get away from yourself.

Don't let the door hit you on the way out.

simply the nature of autism

Not all!

It is not the nature of autism but the vial ableism and myth about it that you seem have absorbed and distribute now.

No one can stop you thinking whatever you like about yourself privately, also it must be damaging for your self esteem and mental health to internalise such crap.

But you cannot speak for others, let alone for 'all' autistic people as a group. This ideas are degrading and damaging stereotypes!

You do not speak for me or my children. Plastic seem have made his position crear.

none lol, what makes you think I'm having some trouble?

Jesus, just read your own post back and if self obsession doesn't jump out at you, you need to read up on what autism is. The word itself  literally means ‘self’-ism, derived from the Greek word ‘autos’ (‘self’). It's not a, what's it called, a judgement or saying something bad, that is simply the nature of autism, that is why we have difficulties in social situations and communication etc, it's why we love our obsessions etc, it's not a bad thing, it's just who we are. It doesn't mean that we don't care about others etc, we often care more about others than most people, but seriously, we cannot ignore the very basis of what autism is. Well we can if we want to live in denial, I suppose, which is always a choice, so you win, because this is getting beyond ridiculous, a bunch of autistic people who haven't got a clue about autism! I'm out of here, I'll leave you lot to swim in the denial. Adios amigos, but you really should listen to your colleagues and your bosses, your work is good and this is not about you. 

What part of "you're not being helpful" are you having trouble understanding?

You call me selfish and self-obsessed then  proceed to ignore my request for you to stop posting in this thread then declare you can do whatever you like and carry on being unhelpful and disrespectful.

You don't know me so cut out the psychoanalysis and stop being such a tool.

and who's been giving advice? I simply answered his question and said what I would do but that's hardly advice and as for the rest, I have no idea what you're talking about?

oh my god, stop what???? Seriously, what are you all talking about????

Now I'm really confused?!?!?!? I think I must have missed a post or two?!?!?

I don't know how to do sarcasm nor do I recognise it so I can assure you, I'm not being sarcastic or making a joke.

Of course a diagnosis doesn't involve a value judgement? What are you talking about? I'm lost now? 

Seriously, just stop.

Have you been reading too much autism hate propaganda masquerading as advice?

You are joking, right?

Sorry, I am new here, I was lurking, but obviously just scratched the surface, I obviously have issues with sarcasm.

Diagnostic criteria do not involve any value judgements you mentioned. If I didn't know better, I would have thought they are common stereotypes and prejudices.