The assessment draws near(Wednesday) . Anxiety levels are rising. Going through major doubts as to whether I'll meet the criteria. I certainly don't think I'm neurotypical , but am more doubtful about being on the spectrum.
Am second guessing why the pdoc put me forward for an assessment. Would it be par for the course for any patient where the subject of ASD is raised, or would the pdoc have to have some level of belief you are on the spectrum to put you forward for an assessment?
This is normal. And yes, a referral for even the initial assessment will not be accepted, unless the referrer can provide enough evidence to suggest the person may very well be on the spectrum.
What helped me, was reading and listening to other people’s experience of feeling this way. It didn’t make the thoughts or feelings go away of course, but it somehow helped me to know that I wasn’t alone and this is typical for an autistic person to experience just before they go for the assessment.
Just be yourself, firemonkey - as obvious as that sounds!
If that's how you are, you'll get through it.
When my assessment came, I went into it with relief that I could finally get things properly and honestly out in the open.
Afterwards, she said to me 'You should get the report in about six weeks... but between you and me, I don't really think there's any doubt.'
Fingers crossed for you.
BlueRay said:And yes, a referral for even the initial assessment will not be accepted, unless the referrer can provide enough evidence to suggest the person may very well be on the spectrum.
The mention of ASD was a secondary event in terms of what was discussed at my appt. I'm wondering how much evidence is based on non-verbal observation as opposed to what is said verbally.
Even what we say, gives clues, without us realising what clues we're giving out. My psych told me that what he was looking for, isn't covered in any of those online tests. They know how to interpret certain signs.
Yes. My report mentioned several things she'd observed about me that I wasn't conscious of at the time. Tone of voice, overly-detailed answers to short questions, etc. I've noticed that recently in some of the job interviews I've been to. I'll answer a question, only to get the interviewer saying 'You've effectively answered my next question, too'. The only thing I was really conscious of was not making eye contact with her... which is normal enough for me, anyway.
After the assessment was over. I asked the psychiatrist if I could ask him a question. I asked why he did that dreadful thing of talking about something he had done which related to something I said. I said I hate it when that happens, it's so distracting and down right annoying, and I never expected him to do it to me. And he said, it's called reciprocal conversation and it's what nt people do, and it was one of the things that spells out autism in me! Lol!
I think I know what you mean. Like when you talk about one of your traits and they say something like 'I do that, too', or 'Lots of people do that, too'... almost as if it's trying to diminish it as having any relevance.
When I was talking over the bullying with the behaviour manager in my last job, she kept on about 'Lots of people get bullied in the workplace', etc.
My brother is the absolute worst. 'I was bullied at school, too.' Maybe. But he was also in the school choir, the school rowing club... and, at age 67, he's still in touch with friends from those days. He has absolutely no conception of true bullying. I lived in fear at school. He loved his school days.
It may be 'reciprocal conversation' - but it always seems like they're trying to normalise everything, as if you're trying to make a big deal out of nothing at all.
good luck for Wednesday!
No. It's more like, if I say I've just come back from Bali, for example, then whoever I'm talking to might say, oh I went to Bali last year, and they will then proceed to try to tell me about their experience in Bali. Things like that. I'm always like, WTF, why are you telling me that????? If I had wanted to know if they had been to Bali, I would of asked them!!!!
With the psychiatrist, I think I mentioned a time when I lived in Cornwall and he started to tell me something about a time when he was in Cornwall. I just ignored him because I didn't know why he was saying it. I've noticed other people do it sometimes but I wasn't expecting it to happen during an assessment for autism! But it turns out, he said it precisely because we were in an autism assessment. He wanted to see if I would engage with that kind (reciprocal) of conversation. Which of course I didn't, because I hate that kind of conversation.
My sister has just emailed her observations- 1) From age of 4 I became more quiet and withdrawn. She was told this by our parents. 2) I didn't seem able to engage in imaginary play and found it difficult to truly play as she and my brother did 3) I was much happier doing my own thing 4) I was physically awkward and quite clumsy 5) I
could be quite obsessive over certain things- like collecting baseball/ football cards even though I had no interest in playing the sport. 6) I had a difficult time reading the emotions ,feelings or reactions outside of those in the family. 7) I had no close friends in childhood and teenage years 8)I preferred to spend much of my time alone 9)As I grew to my teenage years I became more socially awkward and reclusive 10)When younger was quite obsessed with facts and figures 11)I was very insistent on always being right 12)When in a bad phase I had difficulty thinking of others and struggled with empathy 13) I was prone to serious rages 14)When I met my wife in hospital I stabilised more and more . 15)My wife ran the household something I've struggled to do without strong outside support 16)I was much calmer by this time but could not function without my wife organising my life 17) I suffer from extreme social anxiety 18)I have compassion and kindness but struggle with empathy at times. 19) I find it very difficult to multi task 20)
I remain academically smart but increasingly less socially able 21) I'm very intelligent.