New diagnosis

Well I’m gonna be brave and tell everyone tomorrow, if some have issues with it and wanna distance themselves from me then I don’t need them in my life anyway. Hopefully after I will start letting mbe me more then

yeah, I get that. But my rationale is "this is the real me so like it or lump it". Those that know me well TBH have probably always thought I was a bit weird anyway, and accepted it and me, so to them I'm just getting a bit weirder! (I'm gradually telling them about my diagnosis as well)

I still find it hard to let me be me around other people cos I know me is weird, I like my weirdness(so does my wife which is gd) but other people do not. 

I think that's definitely it for me. I've always called it "letting the crazy out", but I've realized it's actually ME allowing ME to be ME. So I like it, and I'm doing it more often rather than feeling I needed to hide it.

At yoga today (first class since being diagnosed a couple of months ago) I realised just how much I stim at yoga! Facial grimaces, little noises, waving my hands.....I've done it before, just never realised what or why. Now I know it's stimming that's great!

I noticed the autistic side of me more once self-diagnosed, but could look back and see that , say the fidgiting, was something I'd always done. Once I had the formal diagnosis, I felt more relaxed about it all.

I got to a point where everything got too much, I’d lost all tolerance for people and couldn’t be around them. I also had enough of living with all the *** in my head and realised I needed help. So last September I went to docs, showed him a list of all the issues I’ve been collecting since I can remember, bout 7 years old. He instantly said looks like autism, year later I have assessment and get diagnosed with aspergers. Wen I went to docs I ended up having 5-6 months of work, got new job in January but should still be off to be honest as head is still slightly ******. 

Hopefully now I can put some meaning to my issues and with some therapy(recommended by asd assessor) I can start to live a better life 

I don't have diagnosis

ok. I have learning difficulties

Hi, how did your diagnosis come about? What's the story?

No it ain’t! Heard of masking? Trying to pass? You’ll be more self aware at this present point and maybe masking less. I find if I’m stressed out I display stringer autistic traits as well.

Glad it ain’t just me

Since I was diagnosed I have noticed all sorts of "autistic" things I do that I never realised I did. I think subconsciously I am now allowing myself to do those things whereas before I was clearly suppressing them.

But on the surface it seems like I am way more autistic than i ever was before.

Don’t get me wrong I’ve always fiddled but seem to be doing it more since diagnosed kinda like I subconsciously think it’s something I should be doing, what’s that all about 

Hi me again lol, is it also normal to start noticing urself doing “autistic” things that u haven’t noticed before ie if there’s something near me to fiddle with I’ll fiddle with it ie tv control, a bottle top or my headphones. Also that said fiddling is increased more when anxious which I find strange as I didn’t seem to be as severe before I got diagnosed. 

Welcome, Jason.

Yes, having a touch of "imposter syndrome" is perfectly normal from what I have seen over the past few years, and it does take some time for all the repercussions to work themselves out, especially when there are years of events from the past that are suddenly shown in a new light.

Forums like this one are just the place to be, in my opinion. Like you, I was given reading materials etc. after my assessment. However, like the one you mention, they were all written by professionals; that is, people looking in on autism from the outside, not people who actually experience the different thinking that leads to the behaviours that they use as diagnostic signs. There is far, far more to autism beyond the narrow range of traits used for diagnosis and the external signs that lead neuro-typical people to find us a bit strange. For example, through talking to people on forums, I have realised that my autism is characterised by hyperlexia, demand avoidance, executive functioning difficulties and alexithymia; all barely touched on at my assessment, and not mentioned at all in my formal report. In fact, even the latest diagnostic guidelines (ICD-11) still make no mention of sensory sensitivities, melt-downs, masking, or burning out, despite the fact that these are all extremely common autistic experiences.

We all have wildly differing combinations of those traits, and even where we share them, they can show themselves in different ways. You really can't beat finding other people with similar experiences to learn from, and to see beneath the behavioural traits to the underlying mental differences.

But do try not to overwhelm yourself by trying to take it all in in one go, it's a lot to swallow whole! And I hope you find the community as beneficial as I have.

Is it normal for an autistic person to be in denial. I’ve been diagnosed but when I read a book I was given called, Autism: a guide for those who support adults following a diagnosis, I don’t think any of it really relates to me. Yet reading some of your guys posts I see myself. 

Im a little confused right now to be honest

It’s been a day and I’m already glad I’ve found this community

Welcome. You’re home. 

I found that too. Better yet, the sense of 'oh, of course, that makes sense now' stays for years, and applies to new situations too.

Take the time to experience it, find out how you relate to daily life and interactions now, and don't feel the need to tell others yet. You may want or need to, but you'll find you change yourself anyway, and that may be all that you need.

Above all, celebrate that you now know a little more about yourself. You're still the same person, just better informed.

Welcome. I think writing new posts and replying to other people's posts here is a good start to find people to talk to online :)