Struggling through life

Hi, I’m new to the forum. 

I’ve always been different from the crowd and have suffered from depression all my life. I’m 41 and work in a fairly demanding job, but I struggle socially and I struggle with dealing with life. 

I recently watched Chris Packham talking about his autism, and although I’ve thought I may have aspergers for a while, some of the things he spoke about hit a chord with me. I’m very ritualistic when I do things regularly. I choose to have no friends as I find people so demanding. I find work absolutely drains me of energy. I don’t go out socialising. I crave time alone and spend a lot of time alone. People, mainly my family, don’t understand how I see the world... the list goes on. 

For the record, I don’t have a boyfriend, have never even been engaged and I don’t have children, so it’s safe to say I’m a fairly unsuccessful human being. 

I went to my doctor a couple of weeks ago to ask about getting a diagnosis and he told me the NHS will only diagnose people up to the age of 19, so I’m well out of that age range. 

Can anyone give me any advice of direction as to what I might be able to do next? I need to find a reason for my weirdness (I went to an art university and was weird even by their standards)

thanks in advance... 

Parents
  • That’s not true, that the NHS only diagnose up to the age of 19. I’m 50 and was diagnosed at the end of October. Read all the notes on this site, regarding the process in the UK for getting an assessment. Then write out a list of the traits that apply to you and go back and see a different GP. You’ve got a right to an assessment and your doctor only has to have reason to refer you for an assessment and the guidelines you’ll find on the NAS website will help you prepare that information. It’s likely to be a relatively long waiting list, although mine was completed, much quicker than they had predicted. It has been less than 12 months from start to finish. A diagnosis is extremely important, to those who seek one, and no doctor has the right to deny you that option. Read the notes, prepare your list, then go back, armed with knowwlefge, to a different GP. 

  • Thanks for the replies.

    The only problem I have is that I went to the best doctor at my surgery. I was surprised when he said I wouldn’t even be assessed. I need to go back though, I can’t carry on feeling like I do without knowing why. 

    I’ll try again I think! 

Reply
  • Thanks for the replies.

    The only problem I have is that I went to the best doctor at my surgery. I was surprised when he said I wouldn’t even be assessed. I need to go back though, I can’t carry on feeling like I do without knowing why. 

    I’ll try again I think! 

Children
  • It’s an official process, so, as long as you go armed with knowledge and evidence, it’s simply a matter of formality. The gp has a form to fill in or simply has to give a few reasons why you need an assessment, and you’ll give him/her the reasons, and then it’s the job of the assessor, not your gp, they aren’t qualified to diagnose you. Don’t give in, this diagnosis is potentially life changing. It was for me. 

  • Hi MooHippy,

    Yes, I would certainly try again - or see another GP.  I'm 58 and received my diagnosis 2 years ago.  I was seeing a therapist at the time, who put in the recommendation to my GP to make the referral.  She had no hesitation in complying.  But I don't think that a therapist's recommendation is necessarily a precondition.

    Good luck.