This week I left what I believe to be a great company as I've worked for them for seventeen years full time and twenty-three years part-time. I left 'mutually' but have left good staff behind with an antagonist working amongst them and other issues which aren't the company but people related.
I'm having an extremely bad day emotionally and haven't left my duvet. Whilst looking at my four walls of my bedroom I'm thinking of those I have left behind but also what I can do to help others. My hands are tied due to me leaving 'mutually' but there must be loopholes so I can help mainly other people. I believe in helping others and have real difficulty in looking after myself and in a way helping others does help me if that makes sense.
40 years in a job and place of work is getting to be very rare.. it will be a huge change for you and we don’t “do” change easily. Give yourself time to adjust and just keep taking one day at a time. There are plenty of opportunities to help others in lots of different ways so be patient with yourself. Sorry you’ve had such a tough day. Sometimes a duvet day or two is very necessary and hope you feel less awful tomorrow.
Thanks, not only change but change that didn't need to happen if people were honest. I believe in honesty and now I am unemployed with no job on the horizon. My hands are tied but I want those that don't know the truth at Director and board level to know so others won't be disadvantaged. I managed to get some help with one colleague I use to work with as they are a vulnerable adult but there are others not so lucky. Also, my manager told me about an antagonist he was aware of but didn't do anything to sort the problem out and instead tried to help but just not going far enough. As a member of the team said my manager could talk the talk but not the walk. The company I worked for has nearly 150 centres and the industry is a close one.
I contemplated suicide last week because of the stress of making the decision and told my Union rep and advocate but what I don't know even though I asked for it to happen was for my HR to be told of my distress.
I have been in a job where I felt unsupported and management not doing things fairly across the board. I ended up being very ill. I should have involved the union but unable to by then . I resigned which made me lose out and it took a long time to get better. At the moment you will most likely be stressed, tired and running on emotions. If you really think you can help others then good luck but otherwise try hard to walk away with dignity give yourself time to get some balance back and then decide what to do.
Hi Misfit, don't think the union would have helped you. I don't know anybody who had these sort of problems where the union would have helped to keep the job. At most they may have some nice words for you, maybe some advice how to leave, that's it. Employers don't care much about what they say when it comes to this. Unions are good for pay negotiations and that sort of thing (ah, and you get discounts on car insurance and Alton Towers tickets, which is particularly useful if you haven't go a car and can't stand leisure parks), but when there are problems with working relationships they are completely useless (despite everything they may say and perhaps genuinely believe).
Thanks Oktanol. I have often wondered and kicked myself but you are right. In addition you have said everything I wanted to say too. Like you said it was too close to my heart and didn’t want to sour addlestones thoughts.
Been a bit stirred up after someone tried convincing me yesterday of what a wonderful thing unions are, mainly for the parties they do... so been thinking about this for most of the day and think I've come to the conclusion that these kind of work relationship problems just aren't something a union is in a position to do anything about. It would require employees to be honest, without this a union is powerless. No idea if this is just typical for UK and perhaps different here, but I doubt it really. Guess we all start with similar ideals - everyone should be treated fairly, nobody should be bullied, people should be honest to each other, when circumstances make someone less productive than required people should get help rather than being punished... Then one or several of those ideals are being violated, as a result most people will feel uncomfortable. What a few idiots (probably many on that forum) do is fighting for those ideals, with bare hands. What many other people do is one of two things: either they convince themselves that there must be a good reason for someone violating their ideals, and therefore it is no violation anymore. That's a very handy reaction because it also implies that the same will not happen to them, because they don't behave in ways that provide this reason. The other option is that they keep being upset about it but convince themselves that there is nothing they can do, that voicing their opinion will not help the victim and will only get themselves into trouble. And they are right - for the one reason that lots of people think that way and therefore all of them do nothing which puts the one of few that react differently in a very vulnerable position. If most would think making their disagreement heard and suggesting solutions can make things better for everybody then this would have a fair chance of happening and in that case some help from the union could also be effective, but it's not going to happen, sad as it is.
Just to show the other side of the coin. My employer is being pretty useless at implementing the RA I need. I've involved the union, esp as the stress was making me suicidal. They're negotiating a settlement agreement for me so that I can leave with a lump sum worth six months wages.