My 9 year old daughter has sensory issues, which is getting worse :(

Hi all, this is my first time into the forum. I have a very bright 9 year old daughter, who seems to function fine at school and then comes home and has awful meltdowns when its time to get ready for bed or getting dressed in the morning. She has always struggled with socks/tights and their seams, so I bought her some seam free ones, but they weren't right and were too stretchy she said. But now its seams on clothes, waistbands, cuffs etc. She spends over an hour screaming and shouting and generally being nasty most school mornings, whatever we do. She also thinks its okay to ask us to dress her, but she's 9.

She also never wants to go anywhere at the weekend, even though we have said we are going to go out previously and we take her to fun places for children. She's fine once she gets there and has a great time, but the transition of going out seems to be the issue. No teacher has ever picked up there being an issue. Her dad is an undiagnosed case and my half sister probably is. I feel very piggy in the middle as my husbands ASD means he didn't want to have children and he hates confrontation etc. Any advice, really appreciated!