Published on 12, July, 2020
OK, so after last weeks violent incident thought we'd try something else.Son was banned from his PC and mobile but it didn't seem to do any good - he was even sneaking back on.
Apart from that hes been pretty good the last week, and is finally making an effort with some of the charts the counsellor has asked him to fill out. Not brilliant but its a start. So we decided to try a difference approach.
We sat him down and made sure he understood. We praised him that things had improved and he was trying and also for his behaviour. We said there are stil things to improve on but we were willing to give him a chance.
We said, he can have his phone back, and have 3 hours a day on his PC.
BUT, and we wrote this down there were some basic rules which he agreed were fair. We said if rules were broken then PC/mobile would be removed for at time again. He moaned a bit about the 3 hour limit but agreed he understood and it was fair.
These included:-
- Mobile stays downstairs at night to resist the temptation of playing games after hes supposed to be in bed.
- He continues with the forms and also reads the books we've bought him.
- No attempting to "forget" how long hes been on PC and exceeding the time
- No sneakily attempting to use mobile/PC after hes gone to bed in the middle of night.
Guess what - less than 24 hours later wife goes upstaris at midnight. Hes in bed playing games on his phone. I just don;t understand how he thinks hes going to get away with it.
Please someone tell me if the approach is right or wrong?
Games for PCs and mobiles are designed to be constantly engaging and addictive so you keep playing and go back to them. When I was younger, I drove my mum to despair for constantly playing video games, but it wasn't because I was deliberately rebelling, they became my special interest and comfort, and to make things worse, my sense of time was and still is awful. As an adult I have coping strategies in place so I don't waste my life away to my interests, but this was only developed during my mid to late twenties. I now set myself a timer if I am going to engage in an interest like video games, or else I risk wasting a whole day to it and achieving nothing else. Whether this is linked to the ASD or not, I find I constantly have to be disciplined with myself and regulate my routines to stop myself falling into bad habits.