Advice/Experience on Giving up Work

Hi all, I'm new here and wondering how other parents have managed when quitting work to become a full time carer.

I've always managed to work around my child's needs by receiving childcare help from my parents but they are now getting to the point where they are finding it harder as they get older.  Coupled with the fact that my child will be leaving school this year (she'll be 16) with no place to go yet I feel I can no longer work and provide the care she needs, my daughter obviously comes first so the current job has to go as I work 12 hour shifts.  All other family members work full time so no option there.

I've tried finding work that's within the hours available but there isn't anything, plus I can't start a new job as the hours may change in a few months and I'll have to leave that job.  I need to be on call for her also as she has no road safety skills and is oblivious to danger, so I would need to accompany her to places.  I've considered outside care for her but I work a minimum wage job so it would cost more to supply care to her than if I just finished work and be there for her myself, which is also my preferred option, she's adorable :)

I'm hoping to receive financial help to cover the loss of income but that is also uncertain, everything is very uncertain at the moment.

I would love to hear from anyone on their experiences with a similar situation on how you dealt with it, are dealing with the change, and any advice you can offer.

Many thanks in advance.

Parents
  • This is a very sore topic for me so I apologise up front. My child was diagnosed with autism and reliable childcare is an absolute nightmare. Using the word inclusive is so wrong. I have had to stop working so now we exist on the fringes of the poverty line. I have found having a child with a disability means you have to struggle for existence: decent place to live, a decent education. How can we change this so being born with a disability does not mean this kind of life.  I can work and contribute to society but now try to exist on income support and caters allowance. 

  • No need to apologise, I understand your struggle completely.  Childcare costs are expensive as it is before you factor in the extra care required, which obviously bumps up the cost so this even isn't an option.  Even if the child attends somewhere during the day it's impossible to find a job that fits in exactly with those hours, plus having to be on call and ready to leave that job for them at a moments notice is another issue with having any employment.

    I've been lucky up until now with childcare but now it's non-existent due to my daughter's life changing and my parent's (the childcare) needs changing.  I don't even know if I qualify for carer's allowance yet as it takes 8 weeks so I'm technically broke until they make up their mind as I can't even work the agency job I have due to the issues mentioned above.  Plus I want to be there for my daughter, I'm the best person for this care, but feel as though I'm penalised at every turn for doing this.

Reply
  • No need to apologise, I understand your struggle completely.  Childcare costs are expensive as it is before you factor in the extra care required, which obviously bumps up the cost so this even isn't an option.  Even if the child attends somewhere during the day it's impossible to find a job that fits in exactly with those hours, plus having to be on call and ready to leave that job for them at a moments notice is another issue with having any employment.

    I've been lucky up until now with childcare but now it's non-existent due to my daughter's life changing and my parent's (the childcare) needs changing.  I don't even know if I qualify for carer's allowance yet as it takes 8 weeks so I'm technically broke until they make up their mind as I can't even work the agency job I have due to the issues mentioned above.  Plus I want to be there for my daughter, I'm the best person for this care, but feel as though I'm penalised at every turn for doing this.

Children
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