Published on 12, July, 2020
Just a bit of fun...
"That's not being neurotypical. Everyone's a bit stupid." "You can't be neurotypical. You don't have a job." "What's your special talent?" "But you don't look normal." "Neurotypical people have no imagination... and you're no exception." "I'm being serious. Don't treat everything like a joke." "But you have no sense of humour." "Why aren't you doing it this way?" "But you seem unfriendly enough." "I haven't started speaking yet." "My friend was neurotypical, but he managed to get over it eventually."
"Are you sure you're normal?"
I think that we should all collaborate on a book - along the lines of Alistair Beaton's 'The Little Book of Complete B***ocks' - a send up of the self-help genre, with entries such as
URINE
Let urine be the mirror of your soul. Every Monday morning, use a chopstick* to whisk a little of your urine in a white porcelain bowl. If your urine turns frothy, you have a terminal illness and will be dead by the weekend.
* If you have issues around chopsticks, it is better to use a fork.
ANXIETY
If you feel anxious, just remember...
you've probably done something wrong to deserve it.
Embrace your anxiety.
Embrace your wrongdoing.