Published on 12, July, 2020
I am a 24 year old female that was recently diagnosed with asperges I feel the diagnosis has made me doubt my self doubt my intelligence and feel so lost. I am at a point where I want to have a career but I can't even handle applying for university. Everything affects me so easily and any minor setback can push me back 100 steps. I want to pursue my dream and be a teacher one day but I am suffering from a lot of anxiety and stress and dont have the family support. I am so scared of waking up one day and feeling like my life has been wasted. I do feel like this disorder is a curse in a lot of ways as it affects so much of my life. I would like to get married and have children and have the career like any other person I just don't know how to take the first steps. Can anyone give any tips or advice or share your own experiences.
Thanks
Hi, just a thought I instantly had reading your post. Not saying that it can just easily be switched off, but comparing yourself to others ("like any other person") is probably not a thought doing you much good. Plus not any other person actually does achieve those things. Of course others compare you constantly to other people or themselves, and if you differ from what they see as the ideal they may make you feel bad for it, it's not good for anybody. Your life won't be wasted only because it doesn't run like other people's lives. Wanting to marry because you have a partner you love is great of course, but there's nothing wrong if you don't do it either. Guess wanting to become a teacher it's likely that you love kids, but try not to start believing you are a failure if that doesn't happen (yet). Family can be awful when it comes to this, hope yours isn't too bad.
Anyway, think it's best to aim for what we think is good for us, not what other people have and do or think we should achieve. Sometimes I believe if I accept myself others will too, but often it seems that's a bit of wishful thinking. Doesn't mean accepting ourselves is wrong though.
Oh yes I have done this for my whole life. I am my own worst enemy and biggest critique and yeah it probably isnt healthy to compare myself to others. I think when I learn to fully accept and love myself this will change. I still have so much to learn about myself I think the diagnosis hit home for me that I can be nice to myself more
Hi.
I went to University, studied Law and did a post grad. I am going to start the process now, but my AQ results are 41.
The only advice i can give you is take baby steps. Email, ring Uni’s and find out what support they offer to those with Aspergers.
Once you have done that, arrange to go and visit them. If you can’t go on an Open Day, ask if you can go on a normal day. Ask to meet and see their support services and Halls if residence.
When you are ready, make your application. Plan your Personal Statement and then write it.
Then apply. Once you apply wait for the offers. You don’t have to accept them.
Remember baby steps.
Regards
Matthew