Published on 12, July, 2020
Do you ever offend other people unintentionally, like me?
I try to live a quiet life, not bothering other people. But other people expect me to behave in a particular way and get very upset at things that don't really concern them.
A recent example is how I upset me sister, by not inviting her to my graduation ceremony.
Beforehand nothing was mentioned or discussed. I never had any intention of going to the ceremony. The idea of getting dressed up and being seen on stage by hundreds of people terrified me. Since the ceremony was optional I turned down the invitation and the two guest tickets.
A week later I got a very distressed phone call from my sister, trying to invite herself to my ceremony. She had assumed from the beginning that she would be invited.
End result was that she was so upset. I got uninvited to her family Christmas.
Greetings. As I said upon a different Thread, I, personally, seem to "offend" some people simply by EXISTING. I attempt here, an example of some significance in my life, which I have always wanted to say to other people, just to find out reaction to the event. It sort of also relates to "graduation", certainly to schooling, and certainly to "offending people".
In secondary school, I was as if not allowed to complete one of my "A-Levels". At the end of the school year, I was one day invited into the head-mistress' office, where she fumbled successfully through reasons to expell me from the school. I asked her for any reasons why, and they were as follows:1 - 'You fell behind in your work!'My answer - 'I recently contracted pneumonia, as you know, and I have since made up for the work which I missed.'2 - 'You are rude, and you STARE at the teachers, including at me right now!'My answer - (I immediately break "eye contact", to begin upon the technique I know for "not staring") 'I look at you, Miss, as you look at me. Isn't it seen as rude to never look at people when you are talking to them?'3 - (After a minute or so) '...You are flaring your nostrils at me!!'My answer - (...I am, and to this very day, *still* utterly astonished at this given reason. Thus, I can only sit there, absolutely flummoxed, confused, and dumbfounded...) ....!
End. If anyone finds this post to be silly or unbelievable... then that means that you have indeed fully understood it. All of it is true. And it is NOT FAIR. Yet it took me thirty years, perhaps, to understand the *real* (unsaid) reasons for my being "let go"... But I wait to see if anyone here also cares or understands..? That is all for now.
This Post is written for the sake of common courtesy, to extend a great "Thank You" to those who replied (DeepThought and Blue Ray)... My initial thought, upon seeing replies (*from real people!?!*) was:"VINDICATION!!!"... and I can see how this "Internet" business has its appeal. But I still cannot do "live chat", or E-Mail, or even "Private-Message", and this whole business still makes me as hesitant and nervous as when speaking face-to-face...Yet I post this as a genuine Thank You; and in closing, I add that I eventually figured that the REAL reason for my pseudo-expulsion from school... was due to reasons nothing-more-or-less than the fact that I had just turned Sixteen, and so they were no longer Legally Obliged to "put up with me" anymore...(!). End of Post.
I'm surprised by your post.
It seems like a contradiction.
Common courtesy !?!?!?
You right a thank you post as common courtesy, yet you were expelled from school?? For your behaviour.
I and many autistics have been accused of lacking Common courtesy.
You’re a great conversationalist DC. We can all shut off at any time, so we understand. You’re doing great.