Sleep mares and schools

Still having problems sleeping & having nightmares and reading on this website others problems with getting children to school, just brings back bad memories of my school days!

Last night I had 6 hours sleep. 3hours sleep, then 2hours in pain and watching DVDs then another 3hours sleep.  So better than average.  The nightmares involved engaging with two people who died years ago.  Why on earth did I dream about them?

I don't drink. (Don't enjoy alcohol. )

I don't take drugs. 

I don't have sleeping tablets. (Overdose/suicide risk )

I don't socialise. (Don't really know how)

My school memories are so bad, I don't understand why parents are so obsessed with sending their children to school regularly.  School just made my mental health worse.

I mentioned previously that I attended 7 different schools by the age of 12. Here are brief details of my experience

WARNING this is a rant!!!!

School A.

First day was 'bad', I remember other children trying to talk to me but I understood nothing they were saying. I wet myself because I didn't know how to ask about toilets or how/what/where......I just sat there.

The next 3 years were a living nightmare. I was physically beaten every school day by the teachers for not speaking, not paying attention, not following instructions or just for unknown reasons.  Apart from crying I was mute.  I missed school for weeks at a time.

After long absences, the school, my parents with interpreters, eventually discovered the obvious that I didn't understand spoken English.  My parents were East European refugees.  So I was sent to.

School B.

My first special school. A school for kids with language difficulties.   Here I was the only white kid in the school with one traumatised black boy and around 50 Asians.  All shunning me and constantly referring to me as the 'englishhhhhh'  got no help in this school.  After around 4 weeks I was expelled.  And so...

School C.

Another normal school very similar to school A.  Except I was no longer mute.  I was an 8 year old with an English vocabulary of a 4 year old.  The violence was infrequent and I actually managed to talk and interact a little with other children.

School D.

This was a Saturday morning school that my parents sent me when I was 8.  Saying that I would love being with my own people.  It was an absolute nightmare. First day, teacher collected last week's  homework and asked us to turn to page 29 of the book to continue where we left off.  

There I learnt nothing.  I was shunned, bullied etc and every time I was dragged there I was thinking of walking out into the road and under a bus , rather than going there.

My attendance was under 50% and after a year I stopped going.  Another year later I was sent there again.  As a 10 year old this time, starting again with 8 year olds.  Again, started a few weeks late and I hated the place and I was shunned by the other kids. 

School E

Was the middle school following on from school C.  I found the change to a new school with new kids very difficult to handle.  And after refusing to go to school for several months I was sent to.

School F

Another special school.  Which I  described a few weeks ago.  This was a cross between a school and a psychiatric ward and I fitted in fairly well. After a year I was returned back to ...

School E for a second time.  This time it was tolerable and I coped up to a point.  Then

School G 

A secondary school , full of problems. New school, new children who knew each other from previous schools.  I knew no one.  Totally alone, bullied and shunned I withdrew socially into myself.

Parents
  • Good evening, to all. If you are reading this, then I have successfully started a new Thread:

    A Query About a Theory: Of The Mind.

    ... Which I was going to post here, but then thought it either to be too long a digression, or for it to be possibly misunderstood. Given further replies since I last posted (!), I see that the topic, here, is back upon schools and dreams, and I wanted to explain my own point of view; yet I saw, and so I wondered that if I said something, then no-one else would understand what I was talking about...!

    So, well, there it is. If I reply further here, then it is because my thinking is in *That* way. And I discovered this approach partly from my own bad dreams. I shall sign off, now.

  • Good evening to any and to all... it is me again, and back here again, if that is alright? "Four Days", says the indicator, and in those four days I see that I was correct in creating a separate digression as I said, for even on my own it is indeed of a fair length (I.e. - it's long). Yet I had to explain that point of view before responding further concerning the content of DREAMS at least...

    The thing is, that I did also used to be interested in the 'Metaphorical Association' (?) of Dreams; e.g. a "bad dream" = "badness in life", or "snakes/spiders/killing/scary things" = "scary/evil/treachery/problems/surmount-that-thing-in-real-life"... I was indeed interested in those sort of metaphors concerning Dreams.
    But then I would have Good Dreams about things which were cited as "Bad" = Snakes, Spiders, Death ... And Bad Dreams about things which are cited as "Good" = Children, Babies, Flying, Cartoon characters... And when checking in a book it would say: "Consider what these things mean to yourself !", and so then I would wonder the point of such a book in the first place, if it is only going to tell me *that*...?
    Concerning this Thread... the reason I left off, and then came back, to write this here... is that, in order to get rid of a lot of Bad Dreams for myself, I had to stop engaging in "Bad" things. I really did like films such as "Robocop" and "Alien", yet they *are* very VIOLENT...and once I stopped watching so much violence upon the Media (not at all an easy thing to do), then my "violent" dreams very much began to fade away.
    Nowadays I have "Good" things constituting my very Bad Dreams, because the Bad Memories are always stored as a Physical thing as a part of my Physical Brain.
    In Sleep, the conscious mind is able to "see" the Brain recuperating (resting) itself, which is a Linear Map, which links to experiences stored in the Brain, which may also link to Bad Schooling, which I also know a bit about... yet I now end this Post because it is quite long. (!) Fair play to all who fully read and understand this Post.

Reply
  • Good evening to any and to all... it is me again, and back here again, if that is alright? "Four Days", says the indicator, and in those four days I see that I was correct in creating a separate digression as I said, for even on my own it is indeed of a fair length (I.e. - it's long). Yet I had to explain that point of view before responding further concerning the content of DREAMS at least...

    The thing is, that I did also used to be interested in the 'Metaphorical Association' (?) of Dreams; e.g. a "bad dream" = "badness in life", or "snakes/spiders/killing/scary things" = "scary/evil/treachery/problems/surmount-that-thing-in-real-life"... I was indeed interested in those sort of metaphors concerning Dreams.
    But then I would have Good Dreams about things which were cited as "Bad" = Snakes, Spiders, Death ... And Bad Dreams about things which are cited as "Good" = Children, Babies, Flying, Cartoon characters... And when checking in a book it would say: "Consider what these things mean to yourself !", and so then I would wonder the point of such a book in the first place, if it is only going to tell me *that*...?
    Concerning this Thread... the reason I left off, and then came back, to write this here... is that, in order to get rid of a lot of Bad Dreams for myself, I had to stop engaging in "Bad" things. I really did like films such as "Robocop" and "Alien", yet they *are* very VIOLENT...and once I stopped watching so much violence upon the Media (not at all an easy thing to do), then my "violent" dreams very much began to fade away.
    Nowadays I have "Good" things constituting my very Bad Dreams, because the Bad Memories are always stored as a Physical thing as a part of my Physical Brain.
    In Sleep, the conscious mind is able to "see" the Brain recuperating (resting) itself, which is a Linear Map, which links to experiences stored in the Brain, which may also link to Bad Schooling, which I also know a bit about... yet I now end this Post because it is quite long. (!) Fair play to all who fully read and understand this Post.

Children
  • A reply to "DeepThought", although it is going to seem a tad daffy...
    - I am grateful... yet then I see the length of it. Reading all of that upon a 7-inch E-reader, Online? No way! My mind switches into "paperback" mode, and so I have to go away and print it out...
    - I read it (full, A4). To reply to this would be an entirely new Thread altogether (!). It is a pity that this is Internet only, since, if the "Papers" you discuss are as like that Post, then... well, if anyone deserves a BOOK, then it is you for all of that.
    - ...Differing cultures, Lucid Dreaming, OBEs ("Non-corporial", you called it, meaning "Non-Corporeal"?), Psychologically "priming the mind", and what is currently socially acceptable... I regret that I cannot "Private Message" you (or anyone), since this is all quite interesting to myself, and I already do/know things about it, yet, of course, specific books (uniting Dreams with Science in this way) are hard to find...
    - ...This is where my reply becomes daffy: It was very inconsiderate of Nintendo to also bring out a new "Pokemon" game a few days ago, since I had become distracted with how to answer you whilst also thinking about petting "electric mice"...!

    To keep this short(ish), I have to close this, now. But that is why I did not reply sooner. Good Evening.

  • Disallowed Cynosure said:

    The thing is, that I did also used to be interested in the 'Metaphorical Association' (?) of Dreams; e.g. a "bad dream" = "badness in life", or "snakes/spiders/killing/scary things" = "scary/evil/treachery/problems/surmount-that-thing-in-real-life"... I was indeed interested in those sort of metaphors concerning Dreams.

    I think that "Bad dreams" and "good dreams" are qualitative evaluations rather than as such 'Metaphorical Associations', in that what relates to what and for what reason is covered under that heading.

    Disambiguating Cynosure said:

    But then I would have Good Dreams about things which were cited as "Bad" = Snakes, Spiders, Death ... And Bad Dreams about things which are cited as "Good" = Children, Babies, Flying, Cartoon characters... And when checking in a book it would say: "Consider what these things mean to yourself !", and so then I would wonder the point of such a book in the first place, if it is only going to tell me *that*...?

    Obviously, whether we like or dislike the theme, content or outcome of a dream is down to personal inclination, or capacity such as reaching our limit of psychological and or physiological endurance ~ i.e. losing sanity points, motivation or energy, or dying in the dream and living on in another, going non-corporial (or out of body) and or else actually just waking up.

    As far as looking in dream books goes, the vast majority of the general fare varieties were not really of that much interest to me, not unlike yourself it seems, but I would occasionally have a little perusal once in while to see what was considered socially acceptable or 'knowledgeable' (wrote I humorously smiling in respect of some, bless). I was though more interested in the categorisations of dreams, but in terms of looking for them in books ~ I had to go into the much more specialised stuff in the psychological and psycho-spiritual or spiritualistic-initiatic sense.

    As for "when checking in a book it would say: "Consider what these things mean to yourself !" this is actually a fundamental really, given the personal inclination or capacity thing, in that what is symbolic or meaning for some will not be for everyone. I mean the complexity and beyond 'normal' stuff in a proportion of my dreams, such as mentioned with going non-corporial, involves going orbicular or geometri-form with dimensional plains having rather different environmental laws and inhabitants.

    Some of my research, in the sense that most people do to find the meaning of their and other's dreams, involved discussing and debating them with my college and university friends across the country, as we would share papers, books and insights from lessons, lectures and our personal and others research etc. There was of course a certain amount of 'pharmaceutical' research going on, so I managed to get a lot of relevant information from that crowd, but overall having insight from a broad range of people from many cultures was definitely a bonus.

    For those who are more intellectually or psychologically interested regarding the analysis of dreams, Sugmund Freud's 'The Interpretation of Dreams' is excellent in terms of his understanding and comprehension of the structural architectures involved in the mind. Some of his interpretations involving his sexual bias 'are' sketchy though, so keep that in mind if you decide to read the book. I would also suggest perhaps reading The Essentials of PSYCO-ANALYSIS featuring Frued's research selected and updated by his daughter Anna Frued, and published by VINTAGE BOOKS London. Perhaps read the Essentials first, or even only, given that it is updated, and the issues are addressed.

    If though you are not so intellectually inclined, but still would not mind going that way with a softer approach, C.G. Jung - Memories, Dreams, Reflections published by FontanaPress, is an amazing personal round up of his psychological research and thoughts about the meaning of life, and all that. If you have spiritual inclinations ~ he covers it extremely well indeed from the psychoanalytical perspective, so definitely worth a go on that front also.

    Disallowed Cynosure said:

    Concerning this Thread... the reason I left off, and then came back, to write this here... is that, in order to get rid of a lot of Bad Dreams for myself, I had to stop engaging in "Bad" things. I really did like films such as "Robocop" and "Alien", yet they *are* very VIOLENT...and once I stopped watching so much violence upon the Media (not at all an easy thing to do), then my "violent" dreams very much began to fade away.

    In psychology/psychoanalysis there is process called 'Priming The Mind" ~ which in many types of therapy has to be strictly avoided in terms of not asking leading questions, in that the patient needs to explore the character of their mind rather than adopt that of the therapist's.

    Whatever though we engage in during the day will to some extent set the theme for the following nights dreams, with sometimes several days lag. Looking at perhaps pictures of dragons or unicorns and such things may give you mystical dreams, or as stated watching violent action films and so fourth, but if you wish to get proactive in choosing your dream themes and going lucid, which is to say waking up and being more aware of being in your dreams ~ mind priming can be particularly useful.

    Like anything new of course it can take a while to get the ball rolling as the expression goes, and of course lucid dreaming is not for everybody.

    There is rather a lot to be said though for letting your dreams come to you as they do and when they do, in that altering the character of your dreams proactively can involve bizarre factor tens, which can take some getting used to and can involve feeling pretty weird for a while. So taking things naturally in their own time is not uncalled for methinks.

    In terms though of dreaming about being at school, in the dream sense I left school behind a long time ago. I think the last one was in the early to mid nineties. The place had in the dream been abandoned and left for derelict ~ quite apt I thought as I walked around. It struck me particularly that there were no coats in the cloakrooms (nor cloaks ever either!). I went into the teachers room and it was still furnished and well dusty, but otherwise empty. There was a monochromatic appearance with a polluted blue-black haze to the place, but otherwise all the colour had drained out and long gone it seemed.

    I reminisced about the building but not the students, because I was a sink hole for all the suppressive authoritarian abuse children need to off-load and dump on the 'weakest'. Most who did as such would seek me out privately and even in some cases sob about how guilty they felt about bullying me, and they all had alot of difficulty with the fact that they felt possessed or taken over when they were bullying me.

    I did have a nightmare about being at school some years before the dream mentioned above, and it was a nightmare in that violence is something that although I can do it, I am a pacifist and avoid it or doing it wherever I can, and the dream was one of those hero sort involving beating up the bullies of someone who had gotten my previous position in the school sociopathic hierarchy.

    During the dream though I was Mr Malevolence complete and utter, invincible and hulkian in strength, and I did not flinch or hold back at all as I did what I did. The rescued one I was all compassionate and consoling with, and as a teacher came into the toilets to see why blood tinted water was running out into the hallway ~ broken sinks and all that, I announced, "THERE SHALL FROM THIS DAY FORWARD BE NO MORE VIOLENCE IN THIS SCHOOL!" in one of those big and heroic-epic-echo special effect voices.

    When though I woke up and for some weeks after ~ I felt shaky, anxious and nauseated about all the violence. I would like to also state the lasting nauseam of this dream was also due to just how horrendously 'blokey-bloke' cliche and all that dross it was, not forgetting also that I had become a fully fledged authoritarian abuser and now ruled the (dream) school sociopathic hierarchy too, so unreservedly quite sickening really.