Hello - I am Penrose76 and a newly-graduated mature student. After years of personal speculation and self diagnosis, I have now undertaken official tests. The results are in and I definitely have Asperger's Syndrome. Even though I suspected and self dx, I wanted conclusive proof,rather than theoretic. I have to let it sink in, as women with AS can be difficult to spot and indeed I believed that I was perhaps NT with Asperger traits (if there is such a thing). To be told today that I 'definitely' have AS has left me with mixed feelings. A week on and I think I am adjusting from the 'Suspected Self-DX' to the 'Confirmed AS DX' but feel a bit adrift. I just want to talk to someone about it, because even though I have got the confirmation, I do feel that I have just been left 'to get on with it.'
So - I have joined up here and am hoping t get more personal insight by people who have ASD rather than just professionals. Would love to hear people's stories and look forward to hearing from you.
I hope you are feeling better about the situation. I was diagnosed earlier this year and have found it to be a bit of a roller-coaster if I am honest.
At first there was relief, then anger at how I had been treated by professionals previously - would it have made my life easier if I had known when I was younger? I ended up questioning everything and felt I then didn't know who I really was due to the years of masking. The first 3 months were the worst as I ended up almost going into denial for a short time that I didn't have ASD as there were people much worse than me, so I used the whole put up and shut up routine, which didn't help at all to no surprise.
I have kind of accepted it now and if anything it has made me more aware of how I have pushed myself too far and what I need to do to look after myself. It is still a steep learning curve though. Not many people know about my diagnosis other than my partner, parents and my boss. I am happy to keep it that way for now as well.
Things do get easier, but like everything it takes time and patience. The forums are very supportive and have helped me no end, especially when I have been at my lowest points. Take each day at a time and don't pressure yourself to feel or need to act in any particular way.
Thank you - I think that I have followed a similar response of relief/anger then wanting to reject it all. I have only let my youngest son, my husband and my two closest friends know - I haven't spoken about it to my sister nor my eldest son, because I think there would be problems.