Help please

I will try that and what a lovely words you sent

'We are most blessed - when we bless others.' 

'Good Words' have no cost - but their value can be priceless...

It is my joy to offer what I can that encourages...

My best to you...  : )

I am so happy that it may have been of some help  : )   I would love to hear how things move along with you and your son... and know that  you are not alone for there are people who truly care...  and although I am new here, I have seen a great deal of what seems like a true, heartfelt, caring, in the forums of this community...

Thanks you so much for your lovly words xx i  will also try what you suggest thank you

Thank you so much for your reply we do have a cat so this could be a reasson he is doing it

Marvelous insight!  : )   It seems quite fitting that it would be in 'finding common ground' that a place of communication can be established - afterall, is that not what people do everyday when we seek to find some comfortable commonality on which to start a conversation... 'conversation' doesn't have to be always verbal or audible... bravo for your insight and willingness to 'look past convention' and rather to choose to 'look to the individual' on how to best 'connect'...   : )

My experience is that if I'm careful with my movement and actions I can get a lot more out of "disabled" and mentally ill clients because they feel that they are heard and understood through mirrored non-verbal body language. Used to do a lot of conversations with actively psychotic inpatients walking alongside them as they paced. 

On further consideration, I do have a 'suggestion' but some people might think the suggestion 'strange' - but I will pose it none the less... If your son is doing this often enough that you can expect to see him do it again, then what do you think would be his response if you were to sit down next to him and gently start licking your fingers and hands, doing this for perhaps a minute or two, then in a casual, matter-of -fact way say, "You know... I am not exactly sure why I am doing this... Do you know why we are doing this?"  and just see if he has an answer...

I saw a man who gave an interview on tv once, and he said that his mother brought him out of a state of non-verbal autism when he was a child by simply 'joining him and then drawing him out'... he would sit on the floor and rock for hours and she would come and rock with him... and this, he said, gave him a 'connection to her'... commonalities between them.... and in response to her 'joining him in his actions' eventually he began to 'imitate small nuances of actions that she would initiate'... and gradually, so he says, he began to 'open up' and connect more with her, and then with the family...

Just a thought...

And just another thought:

Dear Lady, never let anyone infer that 'uniqueness' is somehow 'a flaw'... It is the rose of a different color that stands out as being the most beautiful in the garden...  Unfortunately some people can't see beauty as it is, but expect 'conformity to the norm' as the definition of what 'is' or 'is not'  okay... But my personal opinion is that such people's standards are as flawed as their vision.... : )

Hello Vicky, This is my opinion based on a long life of watching life go on around me... We, as humans, 'observe'... and most parents come to realize that children 'take in' far more than most adults realize...  and so it is that sometimes, we first as children, and then as adults, expand our 'human experience' by choosing to experience what we observe by 'doing such things ourselves'  (like swimming  : )   - and the hoped for result may either be to understand what others 'get out of such an experience' or maybe to 'learn something that may move us along in understanding something else we might like to do' - like eventually learning to surf... 

Life is not cubbyholed events but a series of interwoven chains, or threads, of events that we draw understanding from...

We imitate, we experience, we justify our curiosity, we sometimes fail, but sometimes we succeed... and the success doesn't always 'have a name' or 'a definable reason of 'WHY' we have chosen to do such a thing...

Is it possible that your son has been observing a cat? I often see my cat doing such things... and even the hand scratching sounds like a slightly altered action of a cat 'kneading a blanket' before they lay down on it for a nap.

Maybe he is acting out a questioning of why a cat does such things...

May the best of good things come into your life to bless you, your family and your son....   

Hi Owensmam,

Children on the autism spectrum disorder can often display behaviour that may be challenging. There will generally be a reason for this and it is important to try and understand the trigger for the behaviour when developing strategies.

Please see the following link for further information on behaviour and strategies:

http://www.autism.org.uk/about/behaviour.aspx

You may also like to contact the Autism Helpline who can provide more information and advice on behaviour and strategies. Please see the following link for further information: http://www.autism.org.uk/our-services/advice-and-information-services/autism-helpline/specialist-services.aspx

I hope that helps.

Regards,

Kerri-Mod