Advice on my plan

Yo guys, its Wei. 20 years old male.

Today, I have gone to a mental health service and it wasn't very helpful in my opinion because all she did was telling me what i already know and that the thoughts that gone through my brain was all false which i disagree but it was clear i suffer from Asperger and she wasn't a GP so it was a "solution" attempt she said so she wasn't able to give me a prescription. (Read my previous post if you want more information on my situation)

But i have been watching videos of a clinical psychiatrist and also a professor of a university so he teaches lectures and records them on YouTube, name Dr Jordan Perterson. After watching and follow up some of his many works the past month i have found some encouragement in me and like to move forward but just in case my plan is terrible so i'd ask for some advice here and thanks in advance.

I am currently studying Games Technology and its quite likely that i am going to be required to resit even if i try to work for it right now because I have almost 0 knowledge of what is going on and the project deadline is in 6 days. So instead of trying so hard on this course that i chose to be my escape from reality as it is an introvert course dealing with computers that doesn't require much social interaction. i'll like to face my problems from now on and do what i think i'd want to do and want to give my all at.

My plan is instead of fighting a loosing battle or attempt to fight it again, i'll move toward a new course, i don't know what University i will be going to study this but its going to be Psychology. I will like to know more about my thoughts and myself by learning this course and i am going to try to read books, hard books that I never did before. But before going to University, i will take a year gap for once and take it easy for a year from studying, potentially sort my life out while prepare and research more on the topic of psychology and do readings about it. When i go to the University i plan to at the start of every module/lecture i'll introduce myself to everyone that i suffer from Asperger and would like to make friend with everyone despite having difficulty associating with people and hope many of them would accept it.

What are your thoughts on this? Please give me any advice or insight you think is appropriate. (This is a bit leading opinion but in another words, i am giving up on current course and try to persuade myself that i can move on and do better)

I will try and face this difficult path and get pass the fear of failure for real this time is what i believe right now.

  • Good luck with your meeting- if you can freeze your student loans till next year and then simply transfer them across to a new Uni/course that sounds like a brilliant option. 

    Just a thought; get whatever you can, such as the advice about Student Loans etc in writing, if you can. For example, after having a meeting, or seeking advice, just ask everyone to sum up what they have told you and pop it in an email to you, (say you need this adjustment) so that you have some written evidence of these things/offers/ conversations which may prove useful in future. 

    Best of luck.

  • Ah yes, exactly what i'm thinking about studying psychology, requirements says I only need one of the 4 subjects to be A* which are Maths, Bio, Phy, or Psychology and I have Maths so it was fine without Psychology but as you said helps with start up so why not, I am going to at least get an A here or even A* since im going for it! Trying to hit some high end Uni so requirement to my preferred Uni are a bit higher naturally.

    As for student loan, called my student loan company have it all sorted, frozen the money to be paid to University now since i'm leaving. Going to a meeting in 40 min to get that actually approved, already talked and told my programme leader about it too. 

    Just told my parent about leaving too because I felt guilty doing it without them knowing at all, was very brief so I asked them to wait till they are home with me (my parent is currently out of country) to talk face to face and get them to understand. Oh, my mum and dad was so accepting about all this! I am so shocked >o<. I'm so happy about it, I'm so glad that I was able to sums up the courage to call her because I originally just going to tell them only after they gotten back. (It was so hard to press that call button thoough xD)

  • It sounds to me as if you are really doing your best to plan and embark on a new path. 

    What I do know, with some confidence, is that some Uni's accept less (AAB ) for their psychology degrees and that the A Levels themselves need not be in psychology. 

    However, whatever else you choose to do, if you are serious about studying this subject at degree level,  studying A Level Psychology in your gap year first sounds like a fantastic idea to me, not only to enable you the other A Level you need for your preferred Uni, but more so to give you a good grounding and 'taster' into the subject too.

    I did not realise you were currently studying at Uni, I don't personally know how this works with Student Loans etc if you have already started a degree. Perhaps someone else on here may know and offer their further advice about this?  

  • I'm still in the process of sorting out my current Uni situation such as cancelling student loan, withdrawing programme, and telling my friends and family. I have actually done most of that and calling my mum in about 20 minutes because shes busy right now.

    I made a plan (wrote it down even) to go back to my high school to ask for advice about Psychology study and I know a professor that I could get advice from too. In other words, I have yet to understand the way I would need to approach University to study Psychology completely yet. I have looked up 3 or 4 different Universities, it seems that if I would to head toward a good University such as UCL (my aim) I would need A*AA grade, I currently have A*AB so I am thinking of studying Psychology A level to get that last A. As for GCSE it requires B in Maths or Science and B in English. I have C in English for GCSE so i am probably going for that too. The other Universities are about the same requirements so best if I just go for it.

    Also planned a therapy or a way to face my fear of people and organised my life. I made a draft of my daily schedule includes reading, fixed sleeping timing, exercising and study/research time. I have wrote and confirm a plan of going travel, on my own, to reach further out of the world (I always hated travelling because of the crowd and how exhausting it is for me) but when I thought about what I can be doing during the travel makes me laugh or smile so I knew I wanted to do it. Planned to seek advice on how to travel and save money from relatives and travel agent.

  • I’m afraid you don’t have that kind of control Wei, none of us, to dictate what is written on a public forum. However, there has been no arguments on here and if something doesn’t relate to you/help you, just leave it. 

    But yeah, keep it simple, that’s what I like to do and if the comments don’t relate to you or they’re more confusing than helpful, just leave them be. Take what works and leave the rest. 

    Ooops, just noticed. Yes. There was some arguing going on, nothing to do with you though Wei, and it’s being dealt with by management. 

  • Oh Wei.

    I so want to reply to BlueRay, oh, so so much, ...

    But, in respect to you, I will do as you ask and 'end the non related debate.' 

    You are very right in that things being said on here can be fake and misleading.., so, best to try to take the best bits from all of us and use whatever bits you can to help you make your decision. 

    Have you got any further with your decision, such as finding out anything you may need to know such as what to do or study during your gap year, how to enable the best support at Uni, and what the Uni's require in terms of other qualifications in order for your application to be successful? 

    I am thinking that, finding out what the Uni's need (qualification wise,) may give you some direction to head towards over the coming year to make your eventual application successful? If you decide this is the right path for you, naturally. 

  • Appreciated :)

    As much as it is good to understand different subjects and topic here, but everything is so biased here and due to anonymity as for the purpose of this forum. Things being said and told can be real, fake, misinterpreted, or self belief so I have to be careful. Therefore, I don't really see much of a reason try to argue with another when I am asking for specific advice for my post, although some are still related but as direct as possible would make things in a thread like this much easier in my opinion.

    I do appreciate the fact that you guys cared <3 and seeing the view count goes up knowing how many people I was able to reach and those replies seeing how significant this post can be, may not be much but enough to sooth my heart, so thanks and lets end the non directly related debates to my opening post's here.

  • Sounds all totally great and logical (although not sure it would really work for me), but it's not helping Wei to decide what and how to study, is it?

    Good point. Sorry Wei. 

  • Sounds all totally great and logical (although not sure it would really work for me), but it's not helping Wei to decide what and how to study, is it?

  • I’ve trained in traditional talking therapies/counselling, based more or less on Carl Rogers. I’ve done some psychology at college and uni and in my work I’ve done continued professional development courses on different therapeutic approaches, I can’t even think of them off hand ~ how to work with ADHD etc etc. I have continued to keep up with my studies (almost but not for several months, while I’ve been in burnout) but metaphysics takes things to another level. 

    For example, a metaphysician might never see his client, know his name or no anything about his troubles, and the healing will still take place just as effectively. 

    I guess the difference can best be described like this. If you go to a gp in this country, for heartburn. He will give you some antacids to get rid of it. Or if you have pain, they will give you some painkillers, etc. 

    If you go to a metaphysician, we will find out the cause of the heartburn or the pain and dissolve the cause and the heartburn or pain will naturally dissolve.

    We don’t deal with the outer cause. For example, a person may be having difficulties in their marriage, they’re having difficulties at work and they’re feeling tired and depressed. A counsellor will talk with them about their relationship or work situation etc and try to help the person come to some compromise or something. 

    We don’t look at any of those things. They are of secondary importance. They are only the effects of the cause. So we deal with the cause. We take out the cause and all the outer problems disappear and we might never even have discussed them. It depends on the metaphysician and how they work as to whether any of the effects are ever discussed or mentioned or not.

    They love me in the NHS mental health teams, not because they love me, they think I’m weird and like nobody they’ve ever met before, but I get their caseloads down because I am able to get to the root cause of people’s problems which means they no longer need to be in the mental health services. This sometimes happens at the initial assessment stage. Some I have got to the cause there and then and with others, we have made enough progress that their needs can better be met through alternative approaches and I haven’t worked in a town yet that doesn’t have at least one place that offers excellent community support so I will signpost them or take them there.

    I work within the care program approach so all my interventions are documented etc, I just have to word them in more laymen’s terms as they wouldn’t be understood from a metaphysical perspective anyway.

    I’ve worked with some incredible psychiatrists and psychologists and we learn a great deal from each other but even they are brining in mindfulness techniques and other alternative approaches as well now. They love what I do and through a greater understanding of what they do, in light of the bigger picture, I love and respect what they do. It took a while for me to come to that understanding but they’re out there, day in day out, doing what they do, I couldn’t do what I do to the same extent as that. So we all have our place and my long term goal is to somehow be back in a position where I can work with those people again (the nhs clients) because I have seen that my work is very effective with them, it just wouldn’t pay the bills for me to work with them just now. 

    I can’t even remember what my former counselling qualifications are, I never look at them. I am professionally qualified and recognised by the two leading bodies in this country as a metaphysician/metaphysical practiontioner, which like any other professional body, membership has to be maintained by continued professional development. I keep this up both as a metaphysician and a social worker, which also covers me to work in the field of mental health, with people with severe and enduring mental health difficulties and in forensic services.

    Not all therapeutic and counselling interventions get to the root cause of the problem and they’re not all based on Metaphysical principles but even when I work at a more psychological level, my work is still underpinned by metaphsical principles. So there’s definitely a difference in both the approach and outcomes and the length of time it takes to get rid of the root cause of the problem. 

  • Hi BlueRay,

    Any positive and compassionate support for those in need can often be a good thing in my opinion. And I do appreciate now (thank you and thanks to your earlier explanation,) that when you speak of 'therapeutic support,' you are using this term loosely, in the layman's sense, of something being 'therapeutic' as it is a positive.  

    However, nothing I have so far read has enabled me (personally) to believe that you possess any significant professional understanding of what counselling or 'psychological' approaches are (or mean.)

    So my therapeutic approach is more like counselling therapy but I use Metaphysical principles so it’s more transformative than just counselling. But I will use more psychological approaches as well, depending on the client.

    For example, all ‘therapy’ approaches (in the classic ‘counselling’ sense) work on the metaphysical and 'psychological' level. And therefore your statement above came across (to me, currently,) as twaddle.

    Not that for one moment you have to justify yourself to me, because you sincerely don't.

  • When I work in mental health teams I don’t work as a social worker, I’m classed as a mental health practitioner. Basically, I do what the mental health nurses do apart from giving injections, but we usually have one person in the team that does that anyway. So we assess for mental health issues such as bipolar etc then work on a recovery plan with them. So my therapeutic approach is more like counselling therapy but I use Metaphysical principles so it’s more transformative than just counselling. But I will use more psychological approaches as well, depending on the client. But yeah, any of the things you mentioned could be classed as or be part of a therapeutic approach. And even in social work now with the new care act, it gives a lot of freedom to work in a more therapeutic/recovery model kind of way, which could include counselling type therapy or it could involve a more practical approach such as getting a bath or whatever. 

  • Hi BlueRay,

    Thank you for this.Relaxed

    What you have said is highly consistent with my own professional experience of working with Social Workers as part of a multi-disciplinary ‘Team around the Patient’ approach. Within which, Social Workers will assess each individuals practical needs (alongside an OT) and ensure effective external support is put in place to enable a successful transition/discharge takes place.

    The confusion is mine. I realise that when you use the words ‘therapeutic’ (and metaphysical) and the word ‘practical’ in the same sentence I tend to draw a complete blank as, to me, these seem to be contradictory things. I think perhaps this could be because I have a very different understanding and background surrounding the term ‘therapeutic.’ I appreciate it is possible however that, from a different perspective from my own, a warm bath can be ‘therapeutic,’ eating chocolate can be ‘therapeutic,’ receiving practical support can be ‘therapeutic’ etc.?  

  • Well everybody is different of course but yes, if a person for example has been sectioned under the mental health act in hospital, let’s say, for a few years, I would most certainly be looking at how they are going to manage basic daily living skills when they leave the hospital. For example, if they don’t know how to cook or prepare food then we might look at that and I might get somebody in to help them learn these skills (prior to discharge). The hospitals have facilities to support such activities and often have their own staff to help patients with these sorts of things but if the hospital doesn’t have anybody to do the training then I would bring someone in. 

    Everyone’s different. Before a person is discharged from the hospital, depending on how long they have been there for, we would always do a gradual discharge anyway. For example, they might start by just going for a walk on the hospital grounds, they might build up to going home for an hour or so, this might build up to a few hours and so on. When they first go home I would make sure that we have a support system set up that would make it as easy as possible for the person to make contact for help should they need it. 

    The mental health system (NHS) is now working towards a recovery model, meaning all hospital admissions now are to be seen as temporary (although of course the length is different for everyone) but it is always with a view that once the person is feeling better, we start to look at getting them home or some other living arrangement that is not the hospital. So if I have a client who has been sectioned, once they are able to, we will always be looking at moving back home or some other place. 

    I don’t actually teach anybody how to cook or clean themselves etc but I will arrange for people to do that for them if that’s necessary (either to teach them or do it for them if necessary). But I’m the one who finds out what they need. So I can see where the confusion lies ~ the penny’s just dropped lol ~ no, I’m not doing hands on practical things (although I sometimes do) but I build up a good relationship with them so we can work out, together, what they’re going to need in terms of support, when they get home. I think what I was saying in that paragraph above is that even though I always work from a metaphysical standpoint, my work is very practical in that I work with people at their level of awareness to meet their needs. But I don’t just assess and make arrangements, I work therapeuticaly as well and that’s why I said I sometimes do practical things. 

    Actually, I think I better stop here! lol! I’m not sure if I’m making it even more confusing. I guess when I said, my work is always practical, I meant it is always relevant and helpful for the client. Maybe I used the wrong word. I don’t have a huge vocabulary and don’t always use the right words at the right time, I carry a dictionary around with me but I get tired of looking up words and their meanings so I sometimes use words without being sure I’m using the right ones. So maybe I used the wrong word?!?!? Thinking

  • Hi BlueRay,

    I work very effectively with people with severe and enduring mental health problems. I work in secure forensic units, in mental health hospitals and in the community. I work with people at all different levels of awareness and my work is always practical, otherwise what would be the point?

    I didn't understand this bit (above.)  I got lost at the 'my work is always practical otherwise what would be the point,' mark. I could not understand what practical advice you offer to someone who is sectioned/living in a secure unit.

    Did you mean you work with individuals on how to eat, self care, keep a roof over their heads and clothe themselves in preparation for discharge?

    Please could you explain this 'practical advice for inpatients,' a bit more if you wouldn't mind, thank you. 

  • Hi Oktanol,

    I think this is really good advice and excellent points made Oktanol.

    Psychology and Psychotherapy are kind of my ‘fields,’ which I still get excited about too so to speak, and so I probably got too enthusiastic in encouraging someone else to study these fascinating subjects too, and it is also very true that I am sometimes guilty of being too optimistic as well. 

    But I think you are very right; studying Psychology (especially at Undergraduate level) is a very disciplined and hard subject, and is definitely not intended (or appropriate) to be a place where you can ‘work’ on your own emotional problems. Personal therapy is a much better place to do this.

    And what you further wrote is my experience too, that people who embark on this area of study in order to ‘exorcise their own demons’ rather than want to learn the subject from an objective, academic and 'professional' perspective do end up dropping off these courses in droves.

    I don’t think I have read NAS36787 previous posts, but again I think you are spot on Oktanol when you offered that a change of course cannot substitute for appropriate support and adjustments being in place. So getting the ‘support side’ of studying right is just as important (if not perhaps more so in some ways) than the actual choice of subject itself.

    Ps. Wei, I also think that sometimes we can only listen to our hunches, our 'deep down instincts,' that you mentioned in your reply to Oktanol, and pursue these feelings until their reasoning becomes apparent to us, and continue to move on positively from there. I would therefore definitely recommend that studying G.C.S.E Psychology at home first would be a great place to begin to become familiar with the ideologies and methods of this subject area. Pearson EdExcel do a great G.C.S.E Psychology study book which covers the basics and offers a great foundation for this area of study. Best of luck. 

  • I do live on a different dimension or plane to most people California, that’s very true.

    However, my support is totally practical, when understood. I always meet people where they’re at whether that’s in a one to one situation or whether I’m giving a talk to a group of people. 

    However, on a public forum, where I come to get help,  I’m not particularly addressing any one particular person, I’m sharing my experiences etc so I can get more clarity around them. I come here for help, not to help others. If I help others as a side effect of being here, then great, but essentially I’m here for me. 

    My experiences with the Department of Working Pensions are 100% repeatable with 100% accuracy, 100% of the  time,  by ANYBODY who does the necessary inner work to get to that level of certainty, which doesn’t actually take that long if you have somebody working with you.

    For example, if I was working with you ~ I would probably start with what you said in your second to last and last sentence ~ people need food to eat, a roof over the head, clothes. People cannot live without the basics.  These sentences alone are very revealing and after a little exploration, just getting clarity around those sentences alone would have a huge (positive) impact on your life. 

    I work very effectively with people with severe and enduring mental health problems. I work in secure forensic units, in mental health hospitals and in the community. I work with people at all different levels of awareness and my work is always practical, otherwise what would be the point?  But don’t worry, I’m not going to be trying to help anybody else on here any more. I’ve learmed my lesson there (apart from the ones I’m already in contact with), lol! So have no fear, I will not be trying to help others on here any more. 

    Besides, you’ll probably be pleased to know, I won’t have as much time to come on here as now I’m coming out of my 16 month long burnout, I will be more busy with life helping people who do want my help which of course, is the only help that’s worth anything. If people don’t want help then the best help in the world will be useless to them and there are more than enough people who do want my help to keep me busy for the rest of my life Blush

  • Hey, thanks for your insight.

    What you have said pretty much what I have already thought over and over and over again to try to clarify to myself that if i am doing the right thing. 

    I may not know what they teach in Psychology but I am aware that it will not teach me about Asperger or ASD or any of this sort deeply or even touching it at beginning. It is going to teach about mix of neuroscience, how brain works, psychopathology, criminals and crimes, human behaviour etc. So i think i'm ready to accept the fact that it will not teach me what I want but it will get me started toward what I want to learn. Becoming a psychologist wasn't my goal, I'll like to aim for Psychiatrist which need a master degree and a PhD, that is really where I will begin to learn what I really want but before that foundation are important too.

    About seeking advice, I have some person in mind to talk to and i even plan to go back to my high school teachers to ask for advice. My parent has a friend who is a professor that works in the field of science and teaches a University, i am planning to get full insight of how study works from master and PhD see if i anything i can prepare for it. Never in my previous courses I have thought so deep into seeking knowledge about it.

    My reason of studying wasn't for money or to live richly, having a big house, nice car, branded clothing etc, it was never what i wanted. The previous courses are of money making kind of study for me. But psychology has a meaning to it for me, I want to help myself, understand how normal people (that doesn't suffer from Asperger for instance) thinks and hopefully help people with mental health issues.

    I understand that the risk is high and there is no plan B after it but I have a feeling it will all go well if i try. After understanding that I have Asperger last week i feel like my life changed, its hard to describe but to put it lightly, it's like realising the Earth is round for the first time, its due to my realisation of what and why was my life like the way it is. It simply just hit me so hard and woke me up is what i feel like, its hard to describe sorry.

    I'm aware to not be influenced by others quickly which I was in the past and even mimic their speeches but as you can see that I was able to disagree with what my psychiatrist said to me so I realise I have my own believes now so don't hesitate to give me real advice and thanks again <3

  • Hi Wei, 

    I may be rather unpopular with this but thought I say it anyway (well, yes, that's me...). I've got two friends who studied psychology and when they had to decide for a uni they went to a fair few open days. So obviously these are events where the unis try to attract students, and the ones my friends went to did exactly that. However, in the events aimed at wannabe psychology students they kept saying that studying psychology is to enable you to work in this area afterwards (after some more hands-on training and all that, and not expecting everybody to become a psychologist of course), but that the courses are not aimed at people that come there to get their own issues fixed. Apparently they usually start with a large number of students of that sort and they drop out one after the other. Not necessarily because they can't keep up (that would probably apply to others too) but because they just don't really learn what they want to know. Or maybe they do a little bit here and a little bit there, but it's quite sparsely scattered. So while I totally agree with AngelDust that a bit of psychology would do everybody quite good I'm not sure if the same applies to a university degree. So the idea to do it on GCSE level is probably quite good, then you know a bit better what it's like (although uni may still be rather different). The other thing you could perhaps do is just sitting in some psychology lectures if nobody minds.  

    But maybe you need rather some proper advice before starting course #4. Psychology is not going to fix the problems you had with the other courses. A games technology course being full of people similar to you isn't the reason why you have no contact with others because even though the percentage of your sort of students will be higher on that course than on many others there are still plenty of people that are not like this. More people that all that socialising really easy do not automatically mean that it will all be easier because they make very quickly lots of friends so they don't need to spend the effort to give you extra time and encouragement. They'll probably be very happy to invite you to lots of things but unless you do actually go there this will make little difference and they will soon stop asking. And if the things you get invited to are not your cup of tea then even going there may not improve things that much. 

    Given that finance/accounting, computer science, games technology and psychology are really quite different subjects it would probably be important to figure out what you are actually interested in and where you could perhaps see yourself working (roughly what sort of job/in what field). Apart from that the way it's taught and the size of the courses would also be quite important (psychology bachelor courses are often rather big - that increases the risk of "disappearing"). Then you need to get support, someone who understands your issues, can help you to structure things so you don't start falling behind, helps you to integrate better... whatever it is that you need. Psychology may well be the perfect subject for you, who knows (I'm not sure you do either), but it is certainly not going to replace this support.

    Hope I'm not pulling you down with this, but I thought these are things you need to think about before spending some £9000 and another year of your life (it's not so much about the time but the negative experiences that you don't want to repeat).

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