Hi sorry I’m not sure if I’ve put this in the right bit
the last three to four months my neighbors have been messaging me about my son jumping and scream he is non verbal he jumps a lot when he’s excited he wakes up in the night I’ve tried everything to try and keep him calm and quite as I understand how annoying it has to be for them but it is getting to the point I’m being told to shut him the f**k up and that this has nothing to do with his autism and being told my parenting is bad they are bowing taking this to housing to make a formal complaint is there anything housing can do As I am trying my hardest to inpove the situation I just don’t no what move I can do :( I feel so bad for my son he’s four and having things sed about him is upsetting me
I really feel for you. I understand what an impossible situation this is for both you and your neighbours.
I think first and foremost, don’t be dragged into a row or a screaming match with your neighbours. Keep all evidences that you have, such as the messages they have sent you, and begin to make a journal of dates, times and events, such as your sons waking/noisy times and your neighbours behaviours, offensive language or other threats towards to.
I know it may not seem like it now, but it might turn out to be a good thing if your neighbours do bring in the housing team as this team may be able to mediate between you and the neighbours and help you both resolve this amicably. From what you have said it seems as if your neighbours don’t believe your sons behaviours are due to his autism; a housing officer may be able to educate them that your son’s behaviours are due to his autism and encourage them to be more tolerant of his disability and more supportive towards you. Your neighbours are more likely to believe this information coming from an authority figure (Housing Officer) rather than you.
I think both you and your neighbours are in a painful situation, neither is fundamentally right or wrong; I understand your neighbours wanting a good night’s rest, however, I also understand that you are doing your very best too. However, what is fundamentally wrong is for your neighbours to speak to you the way they have been doing (swearing at you and about your son etc.) If your neighbours don’t involve the housing team, I really think perhaps you should as you shouldn’t have to be living in fear, be sworn at or have your child spoken about in this way. Your neighbours behaviours are heading towards actual harrassment (if not already,) and therefore I would pull in outside help now (such as your local Councils Housing/Anti-Social Officer) before this situation goes any further and you have to involve the police.
I would give the NAS helpline a call, they may be able to help you know where you stand in the eyes of the law with regards to disability discrimination (which is potentially what your neighbours are doing, even if unknowingly) and perhaps they can give you some pointers as to what you can say to your Housing Officer.
Best of luck.
I'm sorry to hear what a stressful time you and your family are having. I agree with AngelDust that you might find it useful to have a chat with our helpline team. They can provide you with information and advice on this issue. You can call them on 0808 800 4104 (Monday to Thursday 10am to 4pm, Friday 9am to 3pm).Please note that the Helpline is experiencing a high volume of calls and it may take a couple of attempts before you get through to speak to an advisor.
Please see the following link for further information:
I hope you find some advice that is helpful.
Heather - Mod
I understand both.Your neighbours need sleep while your son can't help....
I understand there point of view it jut the way they are handling it isn’t very nice
thank you I’ll definitely give them a ring