Dealing with Diagnosis

This week I finally went for assessment and the results are in. It's a yes.

I thought I'd be happy about it but now I'm not so sure. It's really positive that I finally make sense and at 27 that's a huge relief. It also really sucks to have somebody else tell you how inept you are at life and to have to explain the job losses, uni drop outs, relationship breakdowns and all the other negatives that inevitably come from nearly three decades of undiagnosed ASD. I thought I'd scrape through and be told something along the lines of 'mild difficulties,' but to hear 'obviously autistic' was not what I expected at all.

I'm wondering how everybody else reacted to diagnosis? Was it what you expected, and did you do anything to help you process the result? Thank you in advance.

Parents
  • Hi Patch,

    I was diagnosed ASD 1 last week. I'm 52, so am experiencing similar post diagnosis feelings.

    It's a slight roller-coaster, but hang on and you'll be fine.

    I doubt the psychologist told you you are inept at life:

    I also doubt undiagnosed ASD is the sole reason for every less enjoyable part of your life.

    It's very common to hold a new diagnosis responsible for absolutely everything, but relax and it'll pass.

    People with ASD simply see things differently from others....Very differently to be honest.

    To help myself, I joined this place post diagnosis, I told my partner, told my brother, told a few family friends ....that's about it. 

    I was a bit disappointed in most reactions - Most of them didn't really have anything constructive to offer.

    In this forum, I have found people with some similarities: This provided some reinforcement that I'm not the only one going through this.

    Also, I noticed the amount of people who are upset or depressed is much greater than I had expected.

    The comorbidity of ASD and depression is well documented, but I believe we have more to celebrate than to blame.

    I have come across a number of people with ASD recently that make me simply chuffed to to be in this ideosyncratic, quirky and special group.

    My advice to you is to seek out people with a similar diagnosis to your own.

    With today's technology, it's not difficult.

    You'll find there are lots of us around and secondly may find a mentor, a medical professional or other individual who'll show you people with ASD flourish when together.

    "Birds of a feather flock together" kinda thing.

    Finally, I now distance myself from mainstream, uninformed opinions and behaviours about ASD.

    Consider this:

    Ask 100 random people right now if they think the most agile bipedal carnivore was a carcharodontosaurus saharicus or a tyrannosaurus rex.

    96 would of them would most likely stare at you puzzled : Maybe 4 might say "Errr....T Rex?", out of politeness.

    You ask 3 people who share your diagnosis and your special interest and you'll have a great conversation, great time and see your future in a much better light.

    Enough said.

  • Haha your comment about the carcharodontosaurus saharicus made the point very well.

    Before diagnosis I felt very much like that, part of a special group with lots of positives. While ASD certainly isn't responsible for everything bad that I've ever experienced, the assessment (especially the interview) seemed very focused on some of those negatives. I am sure that as I process all of this I will get back to that place of positivity, and think I am already starting to feel better, but some of the observations 'awkward / odd / impaired social skills / relational issues' felt like criticism when I only expected a simple yes or no answer to the question, 'do I have ASD?'

  • Haha I can relate to the wanting a simple yes or no! Lol! When the psychiatrist delivered the news to me, jeez, I was about to burst as he started to go through all the information before finally telling me that yes, I was autistic. I thought what the hell did he do all that for, I wasn’t even listening to him, I just wanted a yes or no. I was thinking, if he doesn’t tell me soon I’m going to grab him and shake him and tell him, just tell me, yes or bloody no! 

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  • Haha I can relate to the wanting a simple yes or no! Lol! When the psychiatrist delivered the news to me, jeez, I was about to burst as he started to go through all the information before finally telling me that yes, I was autistic. I thought what the hell did he do all that for, I wasn’t even listening to him, I just wanted a yes or no. I was thinking, if he doesn’t tell me soon I’m going to grab him and shake him and tell him, just tell me, yes or bloody no! 

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