Published on 12, July, 2020
Greetings. This is one of those Threads which I have been meaning to start for a very very long time. Adults and "People with Children" are welcome to Post and/or "Vent", equally. Please feel free to write anything... and if you can, end it with some resolution/positve hindsight/result.
This is a bad Topic, which I am fed up of seeing sidelined or not fully discussed. "Being Bullied At School" is/was also actually a part of the "Diagnostic Criteria" for ASCs! Please share here experiences, and how you did or would have dealt with them. The more shared, I honestly believe, the more is learnt, if this is is discussed openly and without reservation, Thank You.
I shall begin with only a few things. Advice for dealing with Bullies includes "Ignoring them" and "Laughing them away". This advice does not work, as they either give chase, or they think that Bullying is being *enjoyed* by ALL concerned!
Thanks for any replies in advance.
I am still voting every reply up and Thanking all of them (all of you, Thanks!). This is my own latest contribution, here.
When at school, I had to learn "Bladder Control", so as not to be 'cornered in the toilets' by bullies. I might wonder why schools to this day, are not aware of this very old trick...
Regardless of that, Some other things that almost always work with "bullies" is to FLATTER or to IMPRESS them. It is tricky to do this without getting involved with them ("Do you want to do what I do?" then says the Bully, sort of thing)... yet it IS possible.
This is at school again. I just happen to be "Great" (...) at Art and at using Computers. Once, a girl who was a constant bully of mine, saw some art that I did and she said: "Hey, you may be stupid and strange all of the time but you are really good at THAT, that is a GREAT picture!"
... But because she was a Bully, I simply stared at her, incomprehendingly...! She stepped away, returning my "strange stare" at her... but she never picked upon me after that. That was one of THE weirdest points in my (school) life, and I should never forget it.
LOL, I had almost forgotten about the 'Never use a toilet in Break Time' rule. Toilets are enclosed spaces with only one entrance/exit, with far too many awful things that bullies can do if you are cornered there. If I needed the toilet, I would always wait until the middle of a lesson, then ask to be excused.
I wasn't just targeted by a few bullies at my school though, there were too many to count & I would often get picked on by total strangers for no reason whatsoever, other than that I was some sort of scapegoat for the entire school.
It's almost impossible to properly describe to people just how bad it was. I had to be constantly vigilant for any signs of ambush, but my hearing has always been hypersensitive so I generally relied on that for advance warning.
That feeling of constantly being on the lookout for danger has never left me though, as well the feeling that no matter how hard I try to fit in, I will always be an outsider.
Nowadays, I am very good at wearing masks & blending in, but still haunted by the fear that if I say or do the wrong thing, I might find myself back in the same situation again.
(This is my own technical note, nothing to do with the topic of this Thread. For some reason, I was signed out and had to sign in again with the Post still here in order to Post that last, there.)
(I am not changing the subject.)