Published on 12, July, 2020
Ive struggled my whole life, and still cant do simple things like go to the shop, use public transport, use the phone etc. Ive saw a few phychologists, councillers and CBT never worked.. it was never taken seriously.. was told maybe im just too shy.. or social anxiety. Ive never fitted in, in the past few years i found out more about autism and i knew right then.. this is me 100% so i did all the online tests scoring the highest possible scores. Printed it out and went to my GP. He was shocked i had never been assessed for autism before, so said he would refer me. 2 months later i get a letter from the hospital to attend an appointment with the psychiatrist.......
I went yesterday to my appointment all prepared. I had wrote notes down to remind me of what to bring up, what to say as my mind goes blank and i struggle to process things. I sat down, she went right to asking me questions so i look at my notes and she shouts to me to put my notes away! And i start stressing out and tell her i need them so there was pure silence i couldnt think of a thing to say... it was horrible... so i peek over to my notes and she tells me no! Put them away! I was fidgiting with my phone and she says " no phone " she barley spoke english and could barley understand me. She didnt care after 5mins she says " i dont know why you were even sent to me what a waste of time" my friend tried to help me and speak for me and she kept shh'ing her!!! She said everyone has a bit of autism, and she hates changes in routine too and said woman are no different to males. I came out heartbroken.. tears... went to bed at like 4pm hid under my covers. She did say shed write to my GP to refer to the specialist team. But i have no idea who that is and i cannot be waiting 2-3 years what can i do... i feel lost... no support... no nothing.. and im still crying over this woman yesterday!!!!
You don't live in Surrey do you silentninja?
Oh dear, I am so sorry to hear you had experienced that. I really don't know what to say it is a hard pill to swallow (so to speak). In this day and age it is shocking. I am really lost for words. Words can't comprehend the 'qualified professional' being so naïve yet an uncooperative, very unprofessional. It was uncalled for not only has the doctor made you feel uncomfortable and awkward. She has left you feeling upset and ultimately that has made you lose all confidence, hope and trust. The doctor, didn't deal with your query with sensitivity or see it as an urgent matter.
What makes it worse it is that rather than seeing you as an individual she disregards you and everything that comes with it. It is worth mentioning not every professional is like that. Nevertheless, you deserved to be treated like dignity and respect as anyone would expect. It might be worth seeing what is available around your area etc.
Although, you are feeling hurt but please hold on in there you will find a solution and hopefully get some answers in time. If you aren't satisfied with the service I think you can make a complaint (https://www.nhs.uk/nhsengland/complaints-and-feedback/pages/nhs-complaints.aspx). Or, you could go to the surgery site can contact them whether by phone or e-mail whichever works for you. Hope this helps.
SilentNinja, the thing is, there is no 'magic' cure or therapy that is going to work for you unless you are prepared to put in the work and cooperation to allow such approaches to help you. In the end, it is you that is going to help yourself and all stuff like CBT etc. can do is to show you the way to achieve that. It's as well to remember that the brain is highly amenable to 'elasticity', in other words, human beings are capable of altering the way they think and feel about the world around them and despite the special challenges of people on the autistic spectrum, there are plenty of examples of such individuals who have achieved great success in life despite such handicaps.You have to be prepared to meet your therapist halfway Maybe this particular therapist is not right for you, I don't know as I wasn't there, but please don't fall into a negative attitude about therapists in general as there a some really great ones about. Maybe you've just been unlucky.
Didn't mean to be so negative there, and concentrating on my own troubles.
I hope your friends can help, and you will get better professional help in time, and learn to do more things for yourself despite the social anxiety. Don't give up.
Hi SilentNinja,
I'm sorry to hear about your experience with the psychiatrist, which sounds very distressing and unhelpful. I would recommend you bring this up with your GP the next time you see them, and you also may want to look at the NHS complaints procedure - https://www.nhs.uk/nhsengland/complaints-and-feedback/pages/nhs-complaints.aspx - to make a formal complaint. The Patient Advice and Liaison Service mentioned on that page might be helpful for a situation like this. If you are interested in doing making a complaint, it would probably help to get your friend to write up a statement of her experience of the appointment just as you have done here so that you have two accounts of events.
Hope this is of some help,
Best wishes,
Ross - mod
Some psychiatrists are brutal. They don't like having their decisions questioned, even when new information like possible autism might affect the way they've diagnosed you. Given the unprofessional way she behaved, even if she was having a bad day, you might like to consider a complaint to the hospital.
I had something similar when in secondary mental health care with a really patronising, unhelpful and frankly stupid psychiatrist who has now fortunately retired. Because I was already 'under' mental health care, when I raised autism with my GP, the GP had sent me to her as the doctor I was notionally 'under'. I was feeling strong enough to stand my ground insist on a referral, but the psychiatrist didn't make it easy or listen or accept anything I said. I think your outcome may be similar, so now you're through that, you should be on the waiting list for an autism diagnosis (from the 'specialist team'). I'd just check with your GP in a few days to see if they've had her letter yet (that in itself can take weeks).