Burnout. Help.

Im way too dead to be typing this but ill try. 

For the last few years my burnout has been increasing and simple things get forgotten and stuff. I am having loads of smaller sgut dowms and had a really bad one the other night after a bath. I judt dont know what to do... my mum wants me to get a job like in a month but we agreed to have me clean the house which im fine with but im so dead. 

Bad explainations but I havent got a dx and im only just starting that journey. I fear if i keep focing myself and still keeping with the nt passing which ive feelt as tho i have to keep that im just gonna shut dosm worse more oftej or something 

were eating soon and the idea of going downstairs and all that then watching tv is too much. Ik im not weak but i feel ss tho i am. 

  • No.  That would be the very worst thing.  If there's one thing I can't stand more than a bunch of NTs, it's a bunch of writers.  Or literary agents.

    I need more wine...

  • WorriedI hope not. I feel bad I haven't concentrated on a good book recently. Is it at all possible there might be low-key activities you would find inspiring - a writers' circle for example?

  • For the last few years my burnout has been increasing and simple things get forgotten and stuff.

    Me, too.  I'm heading for something.  I can sense it.  I've lost interest in so many things in recent years.  I can no longer read, which is something I used to love.  I'm finding writing increasingly difficult.  All I want to do is sleep.  And drink.

  • Cool. Good to hear you have it covered. Hope you get your dx soon.

  • Yep, had tests to check fatigue related stuff and also depression. So at least I can rule that side outBlush

    I defo think its more from trying to act as neuro typical for so long. Something similar happened a few years back and I realise now that was related. 

    Thank you Slight smile

  • Just to check: Have you checked out any physical causes for tiredness? I got a simple 'fatigue screen' blood test from my GP to check things like iron, insulin, thyroid hormones and many others. OK, everything was 'normal' for me, but it's so straightforward it might be worth ruling out anaemias and other causes that might be contributing to the burnout. Of course it doesn't pick up psychological things like depression.

    'Autism fatigue' can sometimes be from the effort of socialising or appearing neurotypical.

  • Dear NAS37537, 

    I am sorry to hear you are struggling, I hope the following information will help you out. 

    You may like to contact our Autism Helpline team who can provide you with information and advice . You can contact the team via telephone on 0808 800 4104 (Monday to Thursday 10am to 4pm, Friday 9am to 3pm). Please note that the Helpline is experiencing a high volume of calls and it may take a couple of attempts before you get through to speak to an advisor. Alternatively, should you prefer to send a message, you can do so via their webform:

    https://www.autism.org.uk/services/helplines/main/questions.aspx

    You may also find it useful to have a look at our Community Care page on our website. The page contains information about community care services, at home or in the community, that may be available to you http://www.autism.org.uk/about/benefits-care/community-care.aspx

    You may want to search for services in your area that cater for people with an autism spectrum disorder on our Autism Services Directory: www.autism.org.uk/directory.aspx

    Best regards, 

    Mod-Federica

  • Yes, that's understandable. I hope when the diagnosis comes things will get easier Slight smile

    Retail is a very stressful environment! Open mouth I'm impressed you tried it- I would never have! I volunteered at a day-group for people with learning disabilities for a few years and went from there into education. 

    Time probably will be. Slight smile

  • Yeah I’m pretty sure I’m depressed and the anxiety too... realising that they relate. 

    Yes and no... my mum knows and think my dad may but I don’t think they understand enough plus tbh I feel so awkward:/ maybe in time. Another reason For diagnosis. I hope to become more comfortable n all,that. 

    I worked in retail for a year straight after school... dumb move! By towards the end I was struggling with everything. I did try working in a charity shop again but just didn’t have the energy to keep it up

    thank you so much just guess time may be the key Blush

  • It's hard to know what to reply to this. Disappointed I can only offer my own experiences as an attempt at guidance.

    Firstly it sounds like you might be depressed (which is neither uncommon or surprising in undiagnosed autistics). Have you talked to anyone about this? I found counselling terrifying at first but ultimately really helpful when I was first diagnosed.


    Are your family understanding/educated enough about autism that you feel you could stop NT passing (or as I call it, masking) at home, at least? Just exist there without the pressure to e.g. socialise over dinner when you feel you don't have the energy. Having a safe place to be yourself could really help you.

    Re. the job, I think having a time limit on it is quite unhelpful and counterproductive, as it's so important (with anyone to be honest but especially with us on the spectrum) that it's the right job.

    Have you considered some voluntary work? It would be a chance to try some things without the pressure and on your own terms -and your mum could see it as a stepping stone to getting that "right job" and so perhaps feel less like she needs to put pressure on. It's what I did and I really think that without it I'd never have ended up as happy in employment as I am.

    Hope life starts treating you better soon and that your diagnosis comes as quickly as possible. x