Not doing to well

Song your not alone this community is here for you 

Of course I am going to reply to this post I am concerend about you. It sounds like you are in a very dark place at the moment.iI may not seem like it at the present moment but the dark times will pass I have been there too and so have others as well, you are among people here who truly care about how you are  feeling at this moment. I do not know if you are seeing your Doctor at the present moment but I think it would be a good idea to make a double appointment to see Him/ Her don't be scared to tell them everything you are feeling at the moment they will listen and get you the appropriate help an or medication that is right for you. If you do not feel you can go alone can you ask a family member or friend if they would go with you to the Doctors. My thoughts and Prayers are with you at this difficult time. Always here to listen.

Helena

Hi Song

Glad to hear you are safe and I'm sorry that you do not feel better.

It’s good that you’ve let people know how you feel. We hope you’re okay.

I just want to make sure you have links to services that can help if you feel you need them or if you are unable to cope with the distress or despair over the weekend.

The Samaritans also provide confidential non-judgemental emotional support, 24 hours a day on 116 123, or by email on jo@samaritans.org.

Call your GP and make an urgent appointment. Your GP can make sure you get appropriate help and support. If it is outside your GP hours call 111 to reach the NHS 111 Service: https://www.nhs.uk/NHSEngland/AboutNHSservices/Emergencyandurgentcareservices/Pages/NHS-111.aspx

MIND have information pages on coping with self harm or suicidal feelings based on the experiences of people who’ve been through it that you may find helpful. https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/suicidal-feelings/

If you are very close to doing something to hurt yourself - call 999 now or go to your nearest A&E department. There should be someone there to support you and make sure you get ongoing support.

If you need help with an autism related issue, our helpline can be emailed via webform https://www.autism.org.uk/services/helplines/main/questions.aspx or they’re open Monday to Thursday 10am-4pm and Friday 9am-3pm on 0808 800 4104.

Hope you feel better soon,

Nicky-Mod

I’m glad to hear that, keep fighting. I also don’t want to die today, so it must be a good day! 

Hello song, glad things are slightly better, I so wanted to reply earlier but wasn’t sure what to say, probably to much and may not have helped.

I have found that there is no specific one thing that sends me spiralling down, it is usually many things and then just one last thing that makes it all not worth bothering with. I have had my real lows and I too come here to vent my feelings, I have found the people on here to be very understanding and one or two have been absolutely amazing in that they stood by me, seem to understand where I was, and helped me level out and eventually get through it.

never feel unable to talk here, we really do understand even if we don’t always have answers, we care ok!

take care and please know your contributions and your overall presence and ability to interact so well are very valuable to me and I suspect others too.

x()x

Thank you everyone. I'm feeling a little better now. Hmmm not sure that's true i don't actually feel any better, the crap is still crap but I don't want to die at the moment which is i guess better. Ok i don't know what I'm talking about but I just wanted to let you know that I am safe and to thank you for your support.

That’s why I personally tend to go towards things, as opposed to people, for comfort and happiness.

It's not really that easy though, is it? Surrounding oneself with people who care, understand or even love us, I mean. I struggle to surround myself with anybody, then I certainly can't be picky. Guess I'm not alone with this, I just don't know the others...

Hi Song. You are not crap. None of us are crap, life on the other hand can seem like it sometimes. Or BE crap for a while, but things do move forward and change and thankfully they don't stay crap forever. It's hard to remember that right in the middle of things mind you, to remind ourselves to let these times pass. No, we can't be cured of life but much as it sucks at times the alternative is NOT a more attractive proposition!  

From your post mentioning "being dismissed", it sounds as if something has happened to confirm to you one of my own assertions, not so much that life itself is crap but that People Are Crap. Yeah, I have no real advice about that one. People do suck. Not all of them, of course, but enough of them and in enough positions of power to give me no reason to challenge that assertion. 

Give the average person a tiny bit of power and they don't seem to be able to resist the urge to wield it over someone else out of all proportion to their actual status or expertise. I think admitting our AS status to an NT is an example of this, they seem to see it as an immediate 'promotion' over us. No longer can we legitimately hold a position that challenges theirs because we're 'less than' and can be dismissed without consideration. It's one of the reasons I haven't disclosed my AS to anyone other than my partner and grown-up children. I (apparently) have had enough 'strikes against me' over the years that I've (mostly) successfully challenged loudly over the years but these days I'm just too tired for the fight and refuse to give them any more ammunition. Duck, Puck and Buck em all!! (other capital letters are available) Don't let them grind you down Song.   

I kind of know what you’re feeling:

I’m waiting for diagnosis and

my vocal chords are either closing on breathing or are paralysed temporarily or permanently.  This means I get both mentally and physically exhausted.

Not to mention that when my GP asked for an urgent appointment and I have had to wait a month and half.  

Not to mention they wrote another letter to the hospital asking for a quicker appointment and they said no.

Not to mention when asked for a cancellation appointment they only give it to people on the lost longest.  Not on medical need.

Not to mention I can’t go A and E because of crowds and noise.  And the fact they lied about one lot of results before to get me out of there.

By the way 12 months ago I had no breathing issues.

Not to mention I studied Law and am still stacking shelves (until I got sick) for a living.

And finally I am male in his late 30’s never had a girlfriend or any intimate relationship and lives at home. 

Some days is bad days, some days is good days. 

Perhaps their should be regional ASD support groups run by Local Authorities.

Anyway...

I am still on the waiting list for a formal diagnosis but, based on the hunch that you might be going through the same sort of "internal readjustment" I went through a few months back, I'm reposting this image from the web:

ref: www.c2d.co.uk/.../

You and I both know that we can’t be cured of life. I agree that life can be a terribly cruel thing, and that there are many horrors in the world in which we live, but one can usually still find something that will bring them happiness. This is why I made some suggestions of things that bring me happiness in my previous comment, though I appreciate my suggestions may not be suitable for you.

I am sorry your diagnosis has made things worse for you, but remember that it hasn’t changed who you are. I do hope you manage to find something to help you feel a bit better soon.

Thank you for your advice... That wasn't crap and will help. I very much doubt your crap. Being unique and different is something to be proud of. Surround yourself with people who care, understand and love you and I'm sure you will start to feel much better

Life, can you cure that for me? My body is falling apart my brain never worked properly in the first place. I can't do it all any more.

Having a proper answer the diagnosis is meant to make it all a bit better but it hasn't it's worse. Now I can just be dismissed as autistic, special not just different eccentric.

I’m sorry to hear that Song. I certainly don’t think that you are crap, though I can’t say I disagree with you in relation to life being crap. 

I hope you can find something to help you feel a little better. Sometimes simple things work well, for example a long walk in the sunshine helped to pick up my mood earlier this week. I also often try a favourite food or activity. I do realise however that sometimes you feel so bad that nothing really helps other than to give it time. Life is hard, and it can take it’s toll, so be kind to yourself (no more calling yourself crap!) and remember you are not alone.

If there’s anything specific you are struggling with then do let me know and I will try my best to help. Take care.