Rights at work

Hello, I have just been diagnosed with Aspergers  (I do personally prefer this term).. long story about how I finally arrived here, but for now I need to ask; I am a registered nurse..should I tell the NMC?  Would this help me or would they call my practice into question/would there be negative consequences for me? Any advice would be much appreciated.

  • Hi I'm also an RGN have been for 14 years, diagnosed with AS 2 years ago. I did disclose to a senior nurse and 2 sisters shortly after diagnosis. As far as the NMC goes if your AS isn't directly affecting your ability to do your job I wouldn't tell them, its not dishonest, every time we revalidate we declare that we are of a sound state of mind and as far as I'm concerned AS doesn't change this. If its work adjustments you need occupational health would probably be your best bet and your line manager/ senior nurse. The only problem I find is the social side of things with collegues and sometimes I take myself off somewher for a couple of minute s of quiet. Hope this helps. BTW I'm not having the best time at work at the moment but this is aside of the AS.

  • I don't think anyone is saying that, not from my perspective on the posts here anyway. I am pleased with my diagnosis, like you it has offered me a whole new perspective on myself, my life, the challenges I face, everything! It does fell like a weight off my shoulders too, to know that I finally make sense and I'm not 'broken' or 'weird' or whatever else I've felt on bad days over the years. I definitely see having my diagnosis as a VERY positive thing - for me. It's just that I also recognise the unfortunate fact that it isn't necessarily going to be seen as such a positive thing for everybody else, because they don't know (can't possibly know) the difficulties 'masking' and such have caused me over the years.

    With any good news it's good to feel on a high over it, I did! You should definitely enjoy that high! But when the high wears off normal life resumes and a few realities do settle again like dust. 

    Realities such as, People can be asses. What 'Should' happen isn't what Will always happen. Of course disabilities legislation 'Should' protect you from discrimination of every kind but why expose yourself unnecessarily? You can't file a case for every snide comment and unfortunately these kinds of people are out there.    

  • Wow..so are you saying I should just keep it to myself and put up or shut up..continue struggling beyond my depth or just give up work?

    I am in this situation.

    I continue struggling beyond my depth.

    Do not know what to do!

  • Wow..so are you saying I should just keep it to myself and put up or shut up..continue struggling beyond my depth or just give up work?

  • Technically you do have rights and recourse, but it is a difficult process and doesn't always work the way you expect it to. Tribunals are run by NTs after all. People tend to gang up on us, so don't expect other people to tell the truth.

  • I think it depends on where you work. I've worked in some teams that were extremely b****y and had a small time mentality. I now work in education and have come across the odd department with a negative attitude to those who didn't change who they were to fit in with the pack but on the whole most have been extremely positive and helpful. I'm just about to start a new post, they gave me RA in the interview (extra time for processing my answers), had me in a week after I was offered the post to discuss what RA I need and they've arranged for everything I need to be in place from week one. I can't wait to start and I think they can see that if they do this for me I'll do the best that I can for them in return

    I'd rather be honest and find out quickly that its not the department for me, then move on, rather than feel I have to hide the true me to fit in.

  • Would that sort of behaviour not  be in breach of policies on respect and dignity at work, bullying and harrassment.. as well as discrimination and affecting my rights under disabilties legislation? Worst scenario may be some sniping about 'convenient diagnosis' and 'swinging the lead'.. which would be hurtful because I do the best within my abilities but have really struggled in silence for a long time. .but any such accusations would be groundless and I would surely have some recourse and protection? Yes I agree I'll have to think carefully but I am disheartened by accounts of such negative and discriminatory behaviour and I am who and what I am, always have been.

  • It is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of, but your colleagues (particularly the ones you may be having trouble with) might not feel the same way. I would caution you from telling people without giving this a lot of thought. You never know what people are saying about you behind your back, and a work environment can change from ok to very unpleasant almost instantly, and you'll never know why.

  • Thank you. Yes I'm surprised too; like it's something to be ashamed of, or a secret..which it is definitely not. it could be that some have had bad experiences though. My employers certainly talk the talk about inclusion and equality, but there is a layer of middle managers who really run the show and the people at the top don't know the half..they are so performance and target and micro management driven that they  might try to push me out or downgrade me rather than accommodate. My line manager is good though; don't see any problems there..colleagues? Most (I think) will understand and some might not be surprised, but I anticipate cynicism from some. I'll speak to the ones I trust first ..as for the middle managers with their demands; well that's  where the organisation will need to put its money where its mouth is and I'll need to make sure I am protected. The diagnosis is a relief and a massive weight off my shoulders as it explains my whole life; life should be easier now, but I need to make sure I am assertive enough to protect my rights (in a respectful manner of course). In a social level; now i feel I can explain to colleagues and friends and family that I am not miserable or amtisocial or uncaring, but I neither need or am able to tolerate very much social interaction.. 

  • It all depends on the relationships you already have with people you know. I'm happy for you that you felt comfortable enough with your acquaintances that you felt you could let them know about your diagnosis. However, if you already have people feeling negatively toward you, letting them know you have a condition will just justify their tendency to blame you for any unpleasant situations.

  • I’ve been really surprised to read so many comments advising you to not to tell many of your colleagues. I received my diagnosis in Oct (after going through a few misdiagnoses). I’m overjoyed at receiving this news and still use every opportunity, no matter how weak, to tell as many people as possible. I’ve told over 100 people and only have poor reactions from 2.

    It sounds like you have a good plan and I hope you enjoy your week off.

  • Thank you all for the advice. I have a week's holiday now post diagnosis to think about it all. I will talk to my line manager, read the relevant policies and see a union rep. I will  make a list of all my particular difficulties and what specific areas of work I struggle with and ask for adjustements. Now I will no longer feel isolated and backed into corners at work; I should now be able to ask for clarity and specifics when I don't fully understand what is being asked of me, rather than fearing people will think I am stupid or pedantic..and hopefully I will feel able  to be honest if I need to ask them to back off and allow me some time and space at times when I am given more work than I can cope with, without people thinking I am lazy or not up to the job. I have so far been masking a lot and they don't know the half of it.

  • I would certainly recommend telling the NMC because, as someone else on here has mentioned, if you feel you require adjustments at work at a later date these will be easier / quicker to accommodate if they already have all of the information they need. I would ask at your Union appointment what the guidelines are too as you may, in your position as a nurse, have an obligation to declare your diagnosis to the NMC. 

    As for telling ANYONE else, It is of course entirely up to you but I wouldn't recommend it at this very early stage.

    It would serve no purpose to tell work colleagues all of your personal business from any other area of your life and this one (your health) is no different. Additionally, I would definitely recommend (from my own personal experience) allowing yourself time to adjust to and accommodate this new diagnosis. It's worth taking the time to let the information settle in your own head before having to deal with other people's opinions, suggestions, or biases on such a personal issue. Once you feel comfortable and used to the diagnosis, perhaps learn more about how it affects you as an individual, then you could revisit the question of who to share the information with.    

  • That is probably for the best. Before you tell them, think about what reasonable adjustments you could ask for which would relieve some of your pressure. Be as constructive, respectful, and calm as possible, and make sure everything is in writing. If you have a meeting with someone, follow it up with an email confirming what was said. Maybe everything will be fine and you won't need those emails, but it's a good thing to have if you end up falling into worse circumstances because of your Aspergers. Remember that you only need to tell your line manager, and they should keep it confidential unless you give permission for it to be disclosed to others. The fewer people who know, the better, and your direct manager, if they are competent at all, should be able to arrange for reasonable adjustments for you without spreading your personal business around the workplace.

    I give this advice out of personal experience. I wish you the best of luck.

  • I am not doing ok at work, I have struggled but somehow managed to wing it for years, but the workload, demands, pressures and micromanagement have all gone through the roof in the last year or so; I am.going to have to bite the bullet and tell them, because I am not coping and I am exhausted. 

  • As N...56 said, is there a need to tell everybody? Some suitable person would probably be quite good, someone who would take the time to let you explain what it actually means for you, where you think problems may develop or have developed already, and how someone could help you. Maybe you have some welfare officer in your workplace for instance? I would not simply tell everybody, just like others also don't tell everybody about every health problem they have, but they may tell someone they are close to or who could help them with resulting problems.

  • It shouldn't make any difference to the NMC as long as you can meet your professional standards. Whether there will be any negative consequences depends on the personalities of people you work with. Some see the difference as a threat, an inconvenience etc and act negatively, others will want to be supportive and remove anything that causes you challenges. I've worked in some incredibly supportive environments, as well as some hostile ones.

    If you declare, I suggest you contact A2W for a report of any adjustments or support mechanism you could have. For example, they've paid for me to have access to the app Brain in Hand so that there's someone on the other end of my phone who I can talk to about support strategies when I'm finding things challenging.

  • Thank you. I am in a union and in fact have requested a meeting with them..the NMC issue just occurred to me as I've only just had my ASD assessment and diagnosis, so I'm thinking about how to proceed at work. I have a week off on holiday now and it's still all sinking in and I'm thinking about how to tell my colleagues and bosses..some may not be surprised but I fear cynicism from others..all that 'fashionable diagnosis' rubbish. As you all know it is a long and difficult road to diagnosis (I'm 48) and not everyone understands or appreciates how difficult it all is.

  • If you are doing ok at work with no problems and nobody treating you unfairly then don't tell them because then the problems will start.

    If you feel that you are receiving unfair treatment at work or you think that people see you as different, then it's good to make sure that you protect yourself by disclosing so that you can have some recourse if you are discriminated against.

    It's your choice, of course, but always consider that you need to protect yourself because people on the spectrum tend to get picked on.

  • Are you in a union? ask them as they should have advice. If you are not in the union do join them in case you need them later. 

    I really can't say regarding telling them.