Are there any women here? #2

This is a root and branch (pardon the pun), fresh-start, clean slate thread...and continuation of the Are there any women here? post 

:) 

Parents
  • I'm still here in the long grass and I hope the discussions will continue as it's still reassuring to read other people talk about life in a way I understand.  I do hope also that men like Lonewarrior and others who identify with a more female iteration of autism feel free to comment too, not all men are the stereotype either.

    Does anyone else feel completely trapped in their lives, or are you in stable, even happy relationships and jobs that have survived the revelation of being autistic?  For the most part I'm behaving exactly as I always have because I see no alternative for survival, but some days I feel sure I'm just shy of breaking completely. ()

  • No relationships here; and I have loads of "superficial friends". But I always end up with people being angry with me (even though I so do my best). And when people are angry I almost feel as if someone is holding me hostage - and I can't function until that person has "forgiven" me. Even though I know I am not at fault. I end up sending lots of messages trying to justify why I can't meet up, and I feel they don't get it and I feel their annoyance. 

    I also feel sad because often people come with their issues to me. But when I feel bad, often people don't like ask extra questions and just say okay, and then I feel I have to stop. And the conversation just turns back to them - and I go back into the mode of asking people the right questions. Often I feel that ASD friends are more sensitive and empathetic. 

    I would be interested to know how the other person experiences it. They seem to like this kind of interaction. They keep going for more than an hour sometimes. I kind of like it, because it is interesting. But it is very tiring.

    I often feel I need to justify my existence (why I am not at work, why I have no energy, etc) - even when people don't say it bluntly - and many people do, because they don't understand why I'm not back at work. I don't tell everyone about ASD, I sometimes say burn-out (but that has been like 4 years now) and I do have a Lyme infection and CFS/etc kind of symptoms (I think many people with ASD seem prone to this).

    I often wish I had known what I know about myself now, 30 years ago.... I might have had a hope and a chance at fun relationships and my own family. O gosh I hope I don't sound too mopey and depressed, but then again, maybe that is how I'm feeling now.

Reply
  • No relationships here; and I have loads of "superficial friends". But I always end up with people being angry with me (even though I so do my best). And when people are angry I almost feel as if someone is holding me hostage - and I can't function until that person has "forgiven" me. Even though I know I am not at fault. I end up sending lots of messages trying to justify why I can't meet up, and I feel they don't get it and I feel their annoyance. 

    I also feel sad because often people come with their issues to me. But when I feel bad, often people don't like ask extra questions and just say okay, and then I feel I have to stop. And the conversation just turns back to them - and I go back into the mode of asking people the right questions. Often I feel that ASD friends are more sensitive and empathetic. 

    I would be interested to know how the other person experiences it. They seem to like this kind of interaction. They keep going for more than an hour sometimes. I kind of like it, because it is interesting. But it is very tiring.

    I often feel I need to justify my existence (why I am not at work, why I have no energy, etc) - even when people don't say it bluntly - and many people do, because they don't understand why I'm not back at work. I don't tell everyone about ASD, I sometimes say burn-out (but that has been like 4 years now) and I do have a Lyme infection and CFS/etc kind of symptoms (I think many people with ASD seem prone to this).

    I often wish I had known what I know about myself now, 30 years ago.... I might have had a hope and a chance at fun relationships and my own family. O gosh I hope I don't sound too mopey and depressed, but then again, maybe that is how I'm feeling now.

Children
No Data